We start telling our favourite bedtime horror stories the moment we wake up.
Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay
- I am such a bad sleeper!
- That was a horrible night's sleep - I'm never gonna be able to make it through the day without a nap!
- There is no way I'm going to be able to concentrate or focus on so little sleep.
- That bed is so uncomfortable! I'm never going to be able to sleep well till I can afford a new one!
- What's a bet I'm gonna be exhausted all day and then WIDE AWAKE when it's time to sleep again?
I'm fascinated by the stories people tell themselves about many things, but nothing seems to conjure up quite as much interesting self-talk as sleep issues and insomnia.
"I've never been able to sleep well."
"I know I'm never going to sleep soundly ever again now that I'm a mom."
"I can't sleep if I eat after 3pm
"I always wake up at 4am."
"I always have trouble falling asleep."
"I'm such a light sleeper that everything wakes me."
Science has shown us, over and over again, the great problem with rehearsing the next sleepless night and with reinforcing the bedtime horror story of twisted,damp sheets and dry, gritty, wakeful eyes:
"Studies have shown that the same brain regions become active when a person performs a task and when a person observes someone carrying out a task." Source
"It is now a well-known fact that we stimulate the same brain regions when we visualize an action and when we actually perform that same action. For example, when you visualize lifting your right hand, it stimulates the same part of the brain that is activated when you actually lift your right hand. This shared area of brain activation when we imagine an action and perform it has been demonstrated extensively in the scientific literature." Source
Thinking about, talking about and imagining your sleepless night triggers the same brain activity! And once we start that merry-go-round then yes, the brain will secrete the same chemicals and hormones that created the poor sleep quality last time.
IT CAN"T BE EMPHASIZED ENOUGH that a huge part of great sleep is seeing it happening. Believing it. Visualizing yourself nodding off and deeply asleep. Imagining yourself stretching after a long & restful sleep and being grateful for waking feeling rested, eager and creative. Breathing into the ease of sleep, and the seductive pleasure of simply nodding off.
Self talk is everything. The stories we tell ourselves and others literally shape our future. The coffee break chit-chat "I just never seem to get enough sleep"? The oft repeated mantra triggers the very brain chemistry that causes it.
And so the challenge is firstly to become AWARE of your own stories about yourself. Observe yourself with mindfulness and HEAR yourself limiting, defining and shaping your tomorrow. Once you hear it, you can create just enough mental pause to begin to tell a different story.
- "I slept better last night than I have in a while."
- "I'm finding a quiet hour before bed without computer screens making such a big difference!"
- "I feel so much better when I allow myself enough unwinding time - it helps me sleep a lot better."
- "It's so nice to start the day after better sleep."
The choice for better sleep - which means better focus, faster healing, emotional balance and vastly increased creativity and problem solving - begins with the story we tell ourselves.
So begin that journey to better sleep by changing up your Bedtime Horror Story for a gentle, kind and supportive inner dialogue which encourages deeper rest.
Image by Viveka Rosin from Pixabay
Suddenly feeling very sleepy in my Natural Thai world.
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Gratitude and a big hug from Chiang Mai. x
Although I have been aware of this for quite a while, I still struggle with it, especially with my morning story ( and this morning was a perfect example of that ). I's about time to change this around and create a better bedtime story for myself, both in the night, before going to sleep, as well as in the morning, after waking up.
Thanks for the reminder and a hug from Portugal :>)
It's a lovely journey to change the stories we tell ourselves... and life changing! Hugs back from Thailand. 😊
Good one! Upon reading that I was thinking what my story is I tell myself. I have no trouble falling asleep but it's the waking up where I think I need to change my story! I'm going to try it for I love starting my day energetic and ready to roll!
Thanks for sharing!
It's an ever-evolving mindfulness journey. 😍 And it's all good. Have an excellent, energetic day.
such a good point because many people find it difficult to sleep. Reading a book, listening to soft music does help. Shared
Indeed ... distraction breaks the negative self talk we have about sleep. 😊
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This is so true, we tell ourselves stories all the time and those stories create our day to day lives. Yes I don't sleep so well at the moment, but I have just accepted that. I have always found it really interesting how mums of young children always go on about the lack of sleep, we need to just accept it, cos it is part of nurturing and being present for your child. The more you complain the worst you feel. xx
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The sleep journey with little ones is rough. Im SURE though that as we change up our self talk about sleep, that the quality sleep & sleep habits of our babies will improve. 😊 You're doing a great job, mama.
The first step before training our brain & telling a new story is to leaen to listen to our old programming & stories. Always impressed by your lovely bilingual comments. x
oh, yes of course
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Such an important part of sleep hygiene that I think is commonly missed. Thank you for bringing this topic up for discussion! Another important part of the story is what you first say to yourself when you first wake up. I find myself feeling more rested on the days that I wake up telling myself that I slept well than I do on the days I wake up and complain about sleep.
Ah! that's exactly what I said! They did a study into it and found that this worked. Complaining makes you more tired!
I was pretty certain I had read it in a study as well, but couldn't remember so I didn't say such. I wonder if we can find that study..
Yes, yes yes!! I read a research study a while back that said that those who believed they had enough sleep actually were less tired through the day. I tell my students that all the time:
'How are you?'
'Tired!'
'Did you know that if you 'say' you're tired, you're more likely to experience tiredness! They've done studies which found....'
It certainly transformed how I got through the day - simply telling a different story about how much sleep I got made the world of difference. Love this post!
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