In education line, I am slowly exposed to parents with ridiculous mindset. I am kind of believe that a problematic child mostly comes from a problematic family background. As the saying goes, "like father, like son; like mother, like daughter". They learn everything from the closest people around them which are their parents since they were young. They learn from the way of how you do things, how you talk to others, how you manage your anger and stress to how you dress, basically everything.
Children is the mirror of their parents. This is very true. Emotional parents would not have emotionally healthy kids.
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When it comes to learning attitude, we could not run away from it as well. Parents always have high expectations on their kids, they literally do everything for their kids. They sign up tons of lessons to fill up their kids' schedule, as long as they can afford it. They feel insecure if their kids have more free time compared to their friends' kids. Yes, they have this hidden competition especially among the Asian.
There was this group of parents, who are English educated, but she wanted to send her kids to Chinese school. There is no wrong on the good intention with realizing the importance of mastering Chinese language. As expected, children will have lower score in this Chinese subject, so the parents started to feel anxious about it. For me, it is very normal due to lack of practice and they might not have any interest on it too.
And this is what you could not get by hiring a tutor. In the standpoint of parent, they wish that little money can settle their problem, so they expect you nurture their kids without any effort and time from them. Very contradicting, they are not that willing to pay the amount when it comes to money, they started to negotiate on the price by hoping that to get a high quality of service with small amount of payment. If they could hire a professor as their kid's private tutor at same rate, they will definitely go for it.
I always know that changing the mindset of an adult is more challenging compared to educating the kids. As an educator, our role is not just to plant the right seed in the children but also dealing with stubborn parents. I see the root cause of the problem through conversation when I encouraged the parents to put effort in learning the language with kid.
Not a surprising answer from her, "I am English educated, I have no time to learn the language, I do not want to teach wrong things." For me, they are just excuses, I wanted to make her think in the shoes of the kid, "If you think it's impossible to learn the language, you children will think in the same way too. They might not even wanted to learn it since they do not see the necessity in an English educated family. "
Sometimes, I really do not understand the this kind of parents. They put dreams and expectations on their kids but they do not want to involve in the process of getting there. They started to stand aside then let you take charge of it. Honestly, if not you who do you expect to educate your kids wholeheartedly? Well, tutors or teachers, they play their main role in school but the role of parents is unavoidably crucial for the enforcement part.
I am personally think that education is the most noble profession however it's not being treated like that in the aspect of paid in our country. It takes lots of patience to build up the characters and proper learning attitude before you could see the result.
But you know parents rush for it...
"Dear parents, there is no shortcut in learning~~Play your role well to cultivate the interest and passion, to build up the good characters in your kids. Please put effort before you say it's impossible. If not, pay willingly for the time and effort, we educators are supposed to get."
Feel free to comment~:)
Hope you enjoy reading my post! Have a great weekend!:)
Below are the my posts that You Might be Interested in
- The Alley Sri Petaling
- Homeschool or Learning Centers
- My Nostalgic Childhood Part 1
- Menya Hanabi Mazesoba
- Meaningful Incident
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I know this post is very well meant, and I appreciate that spirit, but children will not necessarily become who their parents are. Parents have an overwhelming influence, and bad parenting is a terrible burden for a child, but it can be overcome.
Teachers, religious leaders, friends, family, neighbors may sometimes offer to children possibilities that the home does not.
If the parents don't measure up, if teachers are not materially rewarded for the effort they put in, they should still never lose sight of the fact that they may be the one positive influence in a child's life. That's a powerful thing.
Yes I couldn't agree more than that! I just couldn't accept those kind of parents with the mindset I pay then I don't want to bother anymore on anythg about kids education and character building. Tutors can't do all roles for just few hours per month. Even yes, how much parents are willing to pay for the time and effort tutors put in, provided they are wholeheartedly.
Hi @fruityexplorer I take it from your post that you provide tutoring lessons hence the rant? 😄 I do agree wholeheartedly with you that as parents, we are responsible for our kids and we are the key to ensuring that our children get a good education. I do believe that even paying someone to do it will not solve the problem because it also depends on the teachers/tutors/educators. I have had my fair share of tutors/teachers/educators who are less than competent. So it is pretty important to find good people to help your kid. I do believe if the tutor/teacher/educator is passionate about teaching and has a heart for the child, most parents would not hesitate to pay a reasonable and good fee to that person.
It's great to hear your story and point of view! Keep it up!
@khimgoh Thank you for your insightful thoughts! Yea, these are just part of my experiences and I see different characters. Well, they wouldn't know if you are passionate and professional before they take your service. So the price negotiation, asking for discount all that are expected despite the market price has already gone up. Yes, everyone just looking at their side only. But normally I will tell them its your preferences, you can hire a lower qualification to teach your primary kids, high schoolers can offer the fee that you expected but not me. Parents do not understand that. 😕A professor can teach college kids, do you think the fee will be lower if your kid is just primary, definitely not. Why would they bother since the same time spent but with lower rate? #educatingparents
so true! i try my best to see the behaviour of my son as a mirror to help me grow as a parent and person and see my own mistakes.
It's not always easy, but I trust in the wisdom..!
That's the spirit! It's kind of hard when adults receive comment and feedback, we are more prideful and offensive. 🤣😂 When we need to reflect about it, I always remind myself that if I'm not being teachable how am I supposed to educate others.
so true!
Absolutely Right.Nice post
Thank you for reading my post!
Got two kids. This was quite helpful, I'll share with my wife.
Thank you for nice comment! Yes definitely, for the sake of your kids, parents should not have excuses on it.
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