This is the best part of an otherwise mediocre painting, done in oil on linen. I destroyed this piece not long after the paint dried.
Today, for the first time in a while, I left my neighborhood. I went to a picnic on the Mississippi River. There were maybe two dozen people. I got to see several old friends, plus all of their kids and dogs. We had good food, a campfire, and a banjo. The weather was perfect. It was nice.
When I was leaving, a longtime friend gave me the biggest, longest hug. She said I seemed sad. When she said it, I started to wonder if I was indeed sad and was just ignoring it. This seemed plausible. So I may be sad and in denial about it.
In other news, I made an ERC 20 version of Rstory today. And I may have found someone to make the EOS version of the token. If and when that happens, Rstory will be operational on three blockchains. Next, I intend to create 1:1 swap contracts connecting these blockchains. Eventually, a sample app or two will be developed. In the meantime, my broader vision for this token is not yet fully formed.
The project feels important but the details haven't quite come together. Which is surprisingly similar to a couple of other situations in my life at the moment. Things are up in the air at home and at work. I've got no control over any of it. I've just been working nonstop and trying not to worry. Perhaps this has made it easier for sadness to creep in unnoticed.
There are many things I'm always a little sad about. These things are like constants in the background. They didn't seem especially present today. I have been feeling particularly weary yesterday and today. Maybe I'm not weary. Maybe I'm sad.
If it turns out I'm sad then so be it. But now that I think about it, three different people told me sad stories today. I wonder how much of the sadness my friend noticed was mine and how much of it was being carried for these storytellers. More to the point, how much was just because we live in a dystopia? Probably some.
Riots. Covid. Outrageous price hikes. Exploding rates of homelessness and addiction. Society is transforming, and quickly, in many ways that are decidedly unhappy. I usually try to focus more on the good changes that are occurring. The legitimization of remote work, for example. Yet the good doesn't cancel out the bad. The Canadian rainforest is being cut. Pipeline construction threatens Minnesota's waters. Some sadness seems appropriate.
This painting has a quality that today didn't have. Hope you like it!