I did not know that today, 05 October, is World Teachers' Day until I saw many posts about it on Facebook. I thought Teacher's Month was last September so Teachers' Day should be done. I knew that because my nephews did not have classes last 30 September in culmination of the Teacher's Month. Now, Teachers' Day? I searched the internet for clarification. Apparently, the Teachers' Month was for Philippine observance only. Teachers' Day today is international according to Wikipedia.
That makes me think of my previous teachers and their impacts to who I am now.
From elementary days, I had teachers who discriminated me because of our family's financial status. In the middle of a mining site in the mountains of Zambales province, families of laborers like us were looked down by some white-collared company staff. In spite of other white-collared staff being fair, the discrimination was stronger. I was stricken out of honor role in my fourth grade and I cried at the end of the school year. That was the first time since kindergarten that I was not attending the school's commencement exercises because I will not be receiving any recognition.
My mother said I am still intact, that they did not take a single piece of me, that instead of feeling down, I should all the more pursue my studies to show them they were wrong. She also said that they (my parents) have nothing for my inheritance except to crawl me over to finish my studies. I wrote about the discrimination four years ago.
In high school, my father died. My mother and I were left in the middle of a town in Benguet province were we relocated and no definite means of income. My mother said I should focus all the more with my studies because, as she repeated her words in elementary, that is the only inheritance she can leave with me; an inheritance that no one can steal. We made it through by going to others' farms as laborers and being sidewalk vendors when there was no farm work.
In college, I had moments when I cried today because tomorrow will be start of examination period and I haven't paid yet even the partial of my tuition fee. They didn't allow students to take exam without necessary payments. My mother said she will do something and she did. I don't remember from whom she'd been borrowing money but she saw me through, along with our usual earnings from being farm workers or sidewalk vendors. She even sold a parcel of the land that she acquired through her real estate sideline just to buy computer for my thesis. I felt bad because it felt like I am abusing her property. I did not want her to do it but she said I am very near there so there is no way I am stopping school. Yes, she made me graduate!
When I started working, I had no plans whatsoever. I was giving half of my salary to my mother and the other half was for my expenses up to the next payday. I did not know the meaning of savings and investments back then. After few years my mother told me to stop giving her money and that I should start thinking of my own. She had her pension so okay, I stopped giving her money and started saving what I was supposed to give her.
Shortly after, she grew impatient. Once she asked my elder sister to call me in Metro Manila where I was working. She wanted me to buy a parcel of land that they were selling. When I asked for the price, I did not have enough but she was very persistent. She said the price is very favorable so we should not miss it. When I still declined, she begged for that lot to be in exchange of my brother's because he prefers the location. She said she will return my money in a week when my brother's alloted lot in a different village is sold. I said I'll try to make a loan from the bank. If it gets approved then fine, otherwise, sorry.
I loaned for a hundred thousand to augment my savings. To my surprise, it was released on the third day without any collateral or co-maker. My mother must have had a very strong manifestation! I bought the parcel of land without even seeing it first. I just sent the money and they took care of everything.
Weeks and months passed but my money was not returned. She said the supposedly buyer of my brother's allocation backed out. Oh well, whoever that buyer was, he or she did not back out. There was no buyer. She just wanted me to have something of my own.
Early morning when we just woke up and she looked much fresher than I am!
Years later, she again sold me another parcel of land. This time, I inspected and liked the location so I bought it. Her impatience did not stop there. Once I told her that I am planning to buy a car, she begged me not to. As our conversarion went on, the begging turned into a challenge.
She asked, "what would you need a car for when you don't have a house? Will you live in your car?"
"Why, won't you let me in this house?"
"This is my house. Have your own!"
"Okay, not a car anymore. Let me buy a jeepney and let's register as public utility vehicle. You manage and take the income."
"Who knows how to manager a PUV? No. Start planning for your house. And make it semi-commercial so you have source of income even if you don't have work."
"But I don't have enough money and I don't want to loan again."
"When will you have enough? Forget the pride. You are not that millionaire who has a lot and dreams of finishing a house immediately. Having a loan is not bad as long as you know how to manage it." She knew that I felt bad having a loan.
That made me put up a four-storey building where the first two floors are commercial spaces. It was not easy as I did not have the financial capability. I had to make a loan, continue the construction while paying the loan, have another loan and the cycle continued. Construction ran for years. I was the one running out of patience especially when my mother once commented in 2016;
"Oh, it is indeed taking long to finish. I just wish I can taste a nice house before I die." Her house was something just a little better off than a shanty. She offered that we sell it to augment my expenses but I did not agree. I did not want "losing" her property because of me, plus, it won't be enough anyway.
This was where I cropped my profile photo here on Hive
Her comnent pushed me to the edge. Third and fourth floors were still not done. There was no way that my savings will be enough so I filed a loan with four banks one after the other with just few months interval. The last one I used the unfinished building as collateral. Surprise, all four loans were approved. Yes, my mother really had strong manifestation. (May I add that my earnings here on Hive helped a lot.) My mother stayed in the new house for two years and seven months before she died. We staged her wake in the same house. During her wake, I was able to terminate the last of my loans two days before her funeral.
With her gone, I am reaping the fruit of her persistence. Without her words of encouragement, struggles to see me through, challenges and business ideas, I wouldn't be where and what I am today. I may be reaching my senior years and still catching paycheck to paycheck.
I highlighted above the words of wisdom that either woke my senses to real life or pushed me to aim for something instead of just living day to day without purpose. Those were just few of the words of a woman who never went to school, did not know how to read or write* and still learned her way in life (did you catch that part where she was doing real estate?), a woman who brought and raised eight children, a woman who never went to school but saw me through from kindergarten to college graduation. That was my mother... my best teacher ever!
*P.S.: She somehow learned to write her name in all capital letters. When I asked how she learned it, she said she asked someone during her early days to write for her and she patiently mimicked the writing. Though, she was shy of letting others know that she knows how to write her name. Every time she needed to sign a document, she would do thumb-print.
*P.P.S.: We will be commemorating her second death anniversary this coming 24 October.
Happy teachers' day to all teachers out there!
What a wonderful tribute to your mother, @macoolette. Very happy, for you, that you could write it. Sadly, many have not had the relationship with their parents, from which such a post could be written.
It certainly conveys a lot about who are and how you got there.
Out of curiosity, if not too personal, where are you in the birth order of her children?
It wasn't all that smooth with my mother. We had the usual mother-daughter fight.
What pains me is when she died not being contented of how she was taken cared of during her last few years. We have been getting her a caregiver but the longest stay was just about three months. She wanted her children to take care of her so the caregivers give up when they feel they were not appreciated.
The last time I saw her alive, three months before she passed away, she asked me to stay and not go back to work anymore. I was scared of my loans so I had to go. She said it will feel really bad for the children if a parent dies and children are away. She still looked that fighter woman then so I thought I could have a little more time for work. I didn't realize she could degrade too fast in three months. She died on the night of 24th, right the night before I was to go home and see her again on the 25th. She died without me and made me feel what she told me. That is something that I am still learning to forgive myself.
I am the last, unplanned menopausal, child. She was telling me that they (with my father) thought my elder brother will be their last child. Then she suddenly conceived at 47. She said the doctor did not even believed her when she went for checkup. I am six years apart from my youngest elder brother whom I followed.
She had seven children and also raised the youngest of her step-children when she and my father got married. That's a ton to me.
Yes, well I understand the challenges of our relationships with parents @macoolette. As well as with our children, as our "quiver full" have been out in the "big, wide world" on their own for several years now ...
My own sense of achieving some peace, having "been through the wars" (how often do I use that phrase ...), is resting on the thought life is not easy. We provide hope and encouragement to other people. And they provide that to us. We hurt other people. And they hurt us ...
Are our lives not "deeper" (and "richer?") for having experienced these issues? Which man has endured since the beginning of time? For this "old warhorse," I (said somewhat grudgingly at times ...) believe the answer is "yes" and I try to ultimately be thankful, in the midst of it all.
As I think you have done here in this post, with this wonderful tribute to your mother, in spite of the difficulties. Well done! ❤️👍❤️
I hope you find your own sense of peace from the "weight" of some of what you have shared, my friend. God bless you!
I feel guilty of not taking care of my mother in spite of her asking for it very clearly. I will never have the chance to make up to her but I cannot drown. As you say, be thankful. For whatever odds have come, we're still here so yes, I am so grateful for that. I just pray that I can find something to somehow make up.
Thank you @roleerob! God bless you too!
💪😉😊🌈🤙 Wow, what a great and smart lady she was! You are so blessed to had grown up with such strong support and guidance.
I luv how savage she was at times.. THIS IS MY HOUSE, U GO GET UR OWN! :p
well, of course its so sad that she is passed, but congrats on all you've achieved na!
U HAVE MADE IT THROUGH THE RAIN.. 😎☔🎶
Yap, my mother can be fierce when she knows she had to move me. She is also the most caring and understanding person I knew when I was down. A lot of times when I cone home from Metro Manila, I would talk about all my complains at work and she would patiently listen even without understanding what the heck I was whining about.
I would say I did not make it through the rain. Instead, my blessings were through the rain. 😊
😊🌈🌺