Pepper's Last Road Trip

in The LIFESTYLE LOUNGE4 years ago (edited)

Although Our Little Family Is Feeling Better ..

Or rather learning how to cope with the loss of our baby boy, I have put off a few posts that were going to include him. I wasn't ready to start blogging about his "last" this and that. His death is still very fresh and very vivid in my memory. Last night, I put my mind to it and put this post together, before too much time passes and it doesn't mean as much to me. Maybe the timing is right. Maybe it will be therapeutic in nature. Yes.. I believe it will.

Pepper's Last Road Trip ..

We didn't know that it was going to be his last trip. Heck, we thought he was going to live forever or at least hoped that would be the case. So when we headed out on the trip to my parents home in Delaware, 10 days would pass upon our return and Pepper would no longer be with us. It's strange to think of it in that light and how precious that trip became to him and to us, now that I am reflecting on it tonight.

I had a passing feeling of guilt, for not taking more trips with him (something he most certainly enjoyed), but quickly realized that the thoughts were irrational and not helpful. We did take him everywhere we possibly could, even if that was limited to just a Saturday morning errand or Dunkin run.

I didn't want to make this post about my potential shortfalls or self doubt, so I am moving on and past that. Lets get to the meat of the trip, regardless of how exciting or not exciting it was.

We've taken this trip a hundred times, or so it feels. We would head out after packing our bags and loading in the doggy comforts, such as food, treats and bedding. I make them an area where they can ride elevated (to see what's happening outside the car) and between the seats. It's safe enough for them and comfortable for sure. They ride like royalty! Okay.. so maybe it's a little tight but they manage just fine once the initial excitement wears off and snuggle down.

IMG_6684.JPG

We pull out of the driveway and all the roads we will see from this point forward, will be as familiar as the ones in our own neighborhood. The car can almost drive itself there, since it has made the trip so often in the past.

Flash forward to the arrival. I didn't want to bore you with dialog of the entire trip.. it's really not all that exciting. The roads that lead us from point A to point B, either cut through endless farmlands, or are made up of highway scenes. Neither one gives me much to write about. After our hellos and after we carried all the items we packed into the car, inside for the duration of the visit, we could relax. The dogs are very familiar with my parents house and property, so it doesn't take all that long for them to re-check things out and settle down.

They have their favorite spots, especially the sunny ones or wherever we are at the time. Pepper will follow my wife and I wherever we go, but Molly is more of a lay in the sun kind of girl. She is quite content having her beds and blankets from home, to snuggle into.

IMG_7794.JPG

Early in the morning, before most were up and about and after their breakfast, Pepper could be found taking a rest next to his little sister. He wasn't dumb, this spot was also near his daddy and close to the breakfast table, that would soon be teaming with delicious smells. A handout was a definite possibility.

IMG_5992.JPG

IMG_5986.JPG

What trip to mom-mom's and pop-pop's would be complete, without the occasional "Handout". Just a small tidbit of egg or bacon. Who could possibly say no to those faces?? Not me, that's for sure, and most certainly not pop-pop. His hand is always the first to drop toward their salivating mouths.

IMG_7777.JPG
HANDOUTS!!!!

IMG_7792.JPG

After breakfast is finished and not another drop of coffee could possibly be consumed, Pepper and Molly are ready to explore. Well, actually Molly is not much of an explorer and doesn't have Pepper's level of curiosity running through her veins, so let's just say she needs to go out to make potty. Out we go! Pepper makes a dart for the dock, and ready to check out whats happening at the water's edge.

1600777826.jpg

He looks left. Then he looks right. his eyes and nose take him up and down the dock, sniffing everything within proximity. He pears out over the ripples on the surface of the water, sniffing at the air running past his nose. We hear the calls of a nearby Seagull, but unfortunately Pepper does not react.. for he can no longer hear so well anymore.

IMG_7803.JPG

Molly was carried down to the dock and seems to be content standing in one spot. She doesn't care for the way the water moves, the way the wood feels on the bottoms of her paws, or the strange sounds coming from up above. I really can't blame her, since she is really quite tiny and not used to being this close to the water.

Pepper runs out of investigation stamina and he is starting to pant. It's time to move on and he takes the lead by running up the steps with Molly not far behind. Of course he MUST make a pit stop every few feet, to pee on anything leaning over the path's edge. It seems like it takes him 10 minutes to walk 10 feet, but we all make it back to the patio and inside for drinks (beer for me, water for them).

IMG_7798.JPG

Thirsty for that drink.. she can hardly wait!

IMG_7796.JPG

Spending time out doors and in the sun is exhausting. Sniffing all that air made Molly a little sleepy, so she crashes in one of her favorite spots, on her blanky, spread across the couch.

IMG_7781.JPG

Pepper has other plans, and joins pop-pop out in the sun room. He sits there for a while, thinking about taking a nap, but never really lays his head down. Pop-pop on the other hand is out like a light. I'm not going to lie, my eyes gently closed for a minute or two, before reopening to find Pepper was missing. Where did he go off to? My wife had no clue. Mom-mom knew nothing of his whereabouts. Molly can't talk, so she's not giving up much information.

IMG_7789.JPG

I hear Pepper whine lightly a few times and it hits me.. I know exactly where he is. He had a bad habit of walking up the spiral staircase to the loft, only to find out that no one was up there. After sitting at the top of those winding steps, he also remembered having a fear of coming down. At that moment he begins to whine, hoping that someone will come to his rescue. Over the course of a weekend, we would find him up there four or five times. Silly dog! You can't beat the great view from up there though.

1600777889.jpg

After some snoozing, lunch and maybe a quick trip out and about, we make it back home to happy hour on the patio. We might as well take advantage of the nice weather before it's swept away by autumn winds. Both dogs like spending time out on the patio with the family. Molly is content laying in her bed while Pepper likes to look out toward the water. There was an extra chair available, so I turned it around so he had a clear view of the canal.

IMG_7809.JPG

He sat in that spot for a good while before becoming bored with it.

IMG_7808.JPG

It's beautiful out on the patio and shaded during the afternoon hours. All sorts of things can be seen flying or buzzing around in the gardens that surround the seating area. Hummingbirds, bees, and butterflies, just to name a few, are sure to catch Pepper's eye.

IMG_7820.JPG

IMG_7822.JPG

This would be the last time he got to spend any length of time outdoors, before becoming to ill to enjoy it. It makes me sad to remember how much he loved spending time on a porch or patio. I am trying hard not to get too sad, but it's hard.

IMG_7807.JPG

Inevitably all good times must come to an end. Out time was up and we had to head back home. We packed up our things, loaded the car as we had just a few short days prior, and said our goodbyes. I didn't know that this would be Pepper's last road trip and his last trip to Mom-mom's and Pop-pop's house. If it were, would we have done anything different than this? Would we have provided more of an experience for him to take with his departing spirit? I have given it some thought, as a mind in distress sometimes does, and my answer is no.

He did everything he always enjoyed doing. He was still very much curious and inquisitive, while exploring the familiar environment. He made the best of the time he had, and what more could we ask for?

Caramel Pop Corn ..

No trip is complete without stopping by Fisher's Popcorn in order to go home with some freshly made deliciousness. Popcorn isn't the best things for dogs to have, but a piece or two doesn't hurt. After we made it back to New Jersey, and to the comforts of our home, we unpacked the car. We had a little time before bed, so we all settled down on the couch for the evening. I took out the popcorn and began to replay the events of the fun weekend out in my mind.

The pop of the lid was all it took for the pups to come running. They took their places by my feet and firmly planted their eyes on my moving hand and the bucket of sweetness. Soon enough they were both rewarded for patiently waiting. "Crunch, crunch, crunch" and it was over.

1600777761.jpg

They were content and the popcorn was put away. Pepper and Molly lingered in hopes of a second windfall of snacks, eventually falling asleep by my feet. I couldn't help to think, maybe, just maybe, they were dreaming about the awesome weekend and what would eventually become Pepper's last road trip. My heart aches thinking about it. I wish he were here, young again, and already looking forward to his next adventure with Molly, my wife and myself.

Maybe tonight when I lay in bed and close my eyes, I will dream of such things and that will be enough. Enough to ease my troubled mind and give me the strength to brave the next one without him. I pray for it to be so.

IMG_7823.JPG

Hive text divider.png

Thank you for swinging by my blog and checking out the post. Have a great day!

Hive text divider.png

.textdivider1233346.PNG

22664_1337216159268_6439837_n.jpg

“Do not go to my grave.

Mary knows, I am not there.
Look for me in between pages
and on people’s lips.
Do not go to my old school.
Do not go to my old house —
I am not in any of those places.
Look for me in your hearts
and greet me there...

...A part of us always remains
when we leave somewhere.
It is a part we can never reclaim
even if we revisit the place
for it was never ours to begin with.
There is so little of ourselves
that belongs to us.
This body is the earth’s.
This heart is yours,
and his and theirs.
The only thing that is our own
is our freedom of will—
our freedom to choose
our attitudes in life.
All else is borrowed.
All else is everyone else’s.”
― Kamand Kojouri

.textdivider1233346.PNG

Untitled.jpg

text16.png

All words, pictures and art pieces are the sole property of B D Miller Gallery, unless otherwise noted and credited, and are not to be reproduced or copied without the prior written consent of B D Miller Gallery.

Hive text divider.png

About Me ~ The Artist

My art work incorporates a wide variety of subject matter, including landscape, seascape, cityscape, and still life images. My works are the product of a continuing process of exploration through which I seek to portray personal and visionary interpretations of my surroundings. My paintings are impressions of places and events from everyday life, an interpretation of my imagination, and personal responses to what I see and feel on a daily basis. More recently I have invested generous amounts of time into my landscape painting. I am surrounded by natural and man made beauty, which inherently presents itself in the tri-state area, and almost demands that I paint it.

Not everything is art. Art is not everything, but it comes close. Art is everywhere and all the time. Art makes you experience the beauty of the world, the people in it, and the places we call home. Art itself is so influential that it can tell stories, show feelings, and express passion or fury. Art exists in addition to language; expression of sensations and thoughts, revealing a way of thinking too subtle and delicate for words.

For me art requires love, honesty and perseverance. In return, it reveals some personal, non-analyzable, and creative untamed passion. For the public, art with its magnificent beauty, improves mood and health and builds better human beings and communities. It engages the intellect, softens the heart, strengthens the soul and frees the spirit.

Hive text divider.png

If Your Interested In Purchasing Any Of My Work:

They can be found for sale on

Saatchi Art

Or

Etsy

If you don't see the piece in either shop, It may still be drying. Let me know and I can upload it as soon as possible to be available. Or you can always make me an offer (in HBD, Hive or any other crypto) in the comments section of this post. If we agree on a price, I will then ship the painting to you. (shipping costs will be determined by your location).

Hive text divider.png

Power House Creatives Logos FINAL_float.png

2N61tyyncFaFVtpM8rCsJzDgecVMtkz4jpzBsszXjhqan9qEZkUsDzMhwgdrt13KBbAh7WqSboQumdv2yhFRRtSdbX6GJhfNVeQ8Lce6Vfx3iuDddUojjdUkNCSsknFgR7FmeGwt2e9C.png

Hive text divider.png

I Proudly Support:

Curation by @qurator, @ocd, @steemitbloggers, @curangle, @steemflagrewards, and @theluvbug, - Kudos to them and many others for supporting great content and making the blockchain a happier and healthier place to spend time :-D

Hive text divider.png

Sort:  

I think it is very natural to wonder about the last of anything. I don't think Pepper would have wanted to know it was his last, he enjoyed his days there, he got to do what he liked to do.

We a spiral stair case also, one of our dogs, Shasta, will climb them to visit when I am upstairs some times. She is a brave little dog when it comes to climbing the stairs, but going down not to sure about herself, I am not to sure about her climbing down, so she gets carried down when she has visited enough.

When we got her she and her sister were so so small, it was fun teaching her to climb the stairs at our old place. It did not take her to long to master, and when she did she would literally fly up and down those stairs. It took her sister a little bit longer to get the hang of it, but then again she was just a little smaller.

It is sad when ears and eyes start to go for our little friends, though they don't seem to mind it to much. It is us that have all the worry genes, especially as our pets age.

I'll still miss Pepper even though i never got to meet him, he was a happy little active guy who came across as just wanting to enjoy life and have fun.

Your absolutely right.. He enjoyed it just as he would have if he knew it was his last. He was a curious little soul who did enjoy figuring things out and exploring his surroundings. I will miss that because Molly is just not that kind of soul. She knows home and her bed is safe and that's good enough for her. I had to force her (and ended up carrying her) on a walk last night. "You need fresh air little girl." She thought different.

Sometimes I wish the worry gene was not in my DNA.. lol

Like Shasta, we too had to carry Pepper up and down. I like the spiral stair case, but it does throw off your perception a bit. Add in bad eyes and that's not a good combination. I was chuckling as I was picturing your pups flying up and down the stairs.. so cute they are.

!ENGAGE

Thank you for your engagement on this post, you have recieved ENGAGE tokens.

What a fabulous life Pepper had! He certainly seemed to enjoy it! Love to you all. x

Yes he did. We were blessed to have had him for so long. Thank you for the love and the support 😊

So beautiful, I'm going to miss Pepper too. What a blessing you got all these shots of him on that last trip! Love the shot of the two of them patiently waiting for a hand to give them a little morsel.

😊 Thank you.. They are never in need of food, although we never over fed them. Molly and Pepper are/were always good and patient. Never barking for a hand out.

You sure got some awesome shots to remember him by.

It is weird to think any time, this or that could be our last time to do that...if that makes any sense...

Anyways I really liked to see these.

Makes perfect sense. I was just talking with my mother, who read the post and said the same thing. She also said that we are only human, so as much as we would want to treat every moment like it was the last won't always work given our tragic flaw to take some things for granted.

I loved the 3rd picture, so so cute! And the poem... It went straight to my heart! Thank you for sharing this!

Yeah.. Molly is missing those moments. Her snuggle buddy is gone and now she shivers more often. I loved the poem because it spoke to me and I have so happy it did to you as well.

This part really got me to thinking..

There is so little of ourselves
that belongs to us.

Quite beautiful and interesting line.... It indeed makes you wonder

What a beautiful post, Brad. It was his last trip, but, I am truly glad he wasn't aware of that, or anyone else. It was a happy time with the people he loved. The pictures show off the happiness and joy of those he was surrounded with. In my heart, it was perfect.

Thank you for showing off the pictures. They were so fun to scroll through. This is what love looks like. They can never take that away from you.

Awww... Thanks Denise. Your right, if we knew what the following weeks were holding for him and us, the trip would have been less of a fun, loving, good time and more of a pity party.

I love to take all those pictures, but then think people may not want to see that much of my life.. lol. Oh well, I guess you and I like that kind of stuff 😊

Thank you for the support and the kind words that always seem to heal my heart.

Thanks for sharing your experience with us!
TIBLogo

You have been curated on behalf of Inner Blocks: a community encouraging first hand content, and each individual living their best life. Come join the Inner Blocks Community , and check out @innerblocks! #lifehappening