At 23, she married him via a civil ceremony because she was already pregnant. The boyfriend who became her husband was 10 years older yet had a personality of a playboy. He was jobless and dependent upon his mother financially and at that time still goes to the uni because his family wanted him to become an engineer. To me, he was the epitome of an irresponsible, happy-go-lucky guy.
When pressed for the truth, she shared that he'd leave her for days and come home whenever he wanted. Over the course of her pregnancy, she had been alone. During labor and delivery of their child, he wasn't there because he was away with another woman. I was mad, too mad that I could not hold myself and told her over the phone to leave him already while it isn't too late (I was in another country at that time).
She laughed yet I know behind the laughter, she was hurting so much.
And it's as if fate had it that during that same time, her parents' relationship was on the rocks and they decided to separate. One emotional blow after another. How tough it must have been for her... She cried yes, but it didn't take long and she was back on her feet, raring her baby even when she was all alone, her husband often away and would go home as he pleased.
At one point I asked why she can't leave him. Her answer silenced me. It was a choice she made even when she knows about the consequences and she'd stand by it because she believes that her husband will one day change. Also, she didn't want to give a broken home to her child. I couldn't help but admire her optimism and faith.
Then a few years later, she found out that her husband had a son with another woman. The boy was a year younger than her little girl. The boy's mother wanted the father to take him in because she was going elsewhere and no one would look after him.
Can you guess what happened?
My friend accepted the boy in their home and took care of him like her own. She's so selfless and has a heart of gold, I must say. I teased her then if she had plans of legally adopting the little man and she said she has faith that the boy's mother will take him back one day.
And she was right on both things that she truly believed in...
First, the boy's mother took him back years later and second, her husband has changed over the years too. He has become a professional engineer after 12 years at the uni and subtly turned into a responsible man. They now live happily with my friend's mother who never got married after separating from her husband 19 years ago.
This is my participation to the second question of the week's LoH challenge, re:
Let's talk about a resilient woman, it can be your friend, family member, co-worker, etc. What is her life challenge and what did she do to overcome the trial she faced?
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What? 😮 I am so floored!
I know right? If it was me, I may have gone crazy or something. It's like she gambled everything she had on the relationship and glad it worked to her favor in later years.
!LADY
It goes without saying that women are the strongest. Society has labeled them as the weakest but it's not true. You've written it beautifully 💖
Thank you lots :) It's so nice that you recognize women as such.
!PIZZA
She's indeed a strong woman, I tried to put myself in her shoes but I found out it's not that easy. Knowing that your husband is cheating can make other woman go crazy not to talk of bringing another woman's child home. I truly commend her for her Faith
I feel you. Just imagining it happening to me doesn't sit well. I often wonder how she and the others were able to get through what they've been.
Seriously it's really tough and not easy. I just don't want to imagine it
Do not attempt to imagine it :)
Okay. Thanks for your concern.
Such a strong and selfless woman is your friend is. Other woman out there would lose her right to think especially if her husband made an affair and what's worst is that it bears a child.
It seems that it's just a trial for her to make her stronger than before and not to trully ruin their relationship. I'm happy that she didn't give up.
She is and I'm just astounded at how she managed through those years. Thank you for your kind remarks.
She was so tough... If ao yun di ko kayang tanggapin lalo na ung magkaanak sa iba ung taong mahal mo. Toxic for me. May lamat na kumbaga.
I have the same feeling sis kaya saludo ako sa mga taong nakakayanan yung ganon. May mga lalaki din akong kakilala na binalikan pa rin ang girl kahit may anak na sa iba.
Grabe ung pain jan ate. Cguro for me okay pa ung both of you nagkaroon ng anak sa pagkadalaga or binata pero ung magloloko habang kayu pa, un ung no no tlga. Nakaka trauma un.
D ko maimagine sis, pero ganon nga siguro sila magmahal :)
Wow! I have no words. Her story is truly unique because women who face situations like this rarely get their happy endings with the said man.
She’s truly kind and resilient and I’m happy it all worked out for her at the end.
The stigma around ‘broken homes’ is one we most collectively let go of as a society. There’s nothing broken about single parenthood and there’s definitely no shame in it. ‘Staying for the kids’ is what I believe results in a broken home because that is an unhealthy environment to raise a child in.
Like I said, her story in unique and I’m glad she got her happy ending because she deserves it.
Hey farmgirl, been a minute since we bumped into each other. Howdy? 🤗
Hello @yourservice, it's been a while :) I'm doing well and I hope you are too? Thank you !LADY
Hers is rare indeed, including 2 of someone I know who went through similar experience as hers.
I am with you on this. I strongly believe that no one should stay bounded to a marriage who no longer works because of children.
The lady is nice to be able to take in his husband child and care for him because only a strong and nice person can do what she did.
You are right about that @mercysugar. Her kind is very rare I think :)
By reading your story, I think that we know who is the "stronger" sex... Always was, always will be... Women and mothers are stronger than 100 wrestlers...
Thanks for sharing this beautiful story!
I have picked this post on behalf of the @OurPick project which will be highlighted in the next post!
Thank you lots for your appreciation to women and mothers. They are indeed commendable with their strength and courage. I appreciate you once again for including my post on your pick :)
Wow.. Your friend is so resilient indeed. I guess I can't stand it knowing that my husband is cheating on me.. I might just gonna give him up..
But the same happened to my mother. She believed that my father would change someday.. And it did happen 😊..
Still not done with my entry here.. !LADY
She's one unbelievable soul and the fact that she was my age is even more admirable :) Just like you, I can't bear the thought of a spouse cheating. I have 3 friends and an aunt of similar experiences so I'm really convinced that there are women who hold on to their faith and love. And just like your mom as you mentioned :) Glad their men changed for the better :)
You still got time sis hehe. Thank you and all the best!
Some !LOLZ for ya, the lady command is on a day off today hihi
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Kaya nga..and you are lucky for having a loyal farmboy. Farmbaby na lang tlga kulang hehe.. Ako, paubaya lang muna haha.. Thanks !LUV
Hehe :) You will meet yours too, you never know when but you will :)
A heart pure of gold! a woman has a thousand reasons to stay, but a man could get out of the relationship even for just one mistake. I admire your friend, If I were in her situation I'll better leave that man and make him suffer.
I thought of the same things and even beckoned her to leave him. Just glad she didn't listen to me hehe. She's one of the 3 people I personally who have been through such.
I'm really inspired by this story. Though it may not work for everyone but I admire her resilience and faith. It's a beautiful story but I know that If it were to be me, my impatience will never let me stay three days taking in all those disrespect.
Thank you Zara, they are rare I think. Most of us would probably walk out the door sooner.
Someone like me. Lol
And nothing's wrong with that ;) We value our sanity hehe
Oh yes! We value our sanity indeed. Lol, her perseverance is on the high side. Lol
Visionary. If I may say anything about her. Stayed her course until everything aligned with her. The strength of a loving woman is unmatched. Women are such a blessing.
Oh, what a great way to put it and I must agree with you. She set her course and stayed on it for years until the things she truly believed in happened. Thank you for your amazing input and appreciation of a woman's strength :)
!PIZZA
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Wow! What faith she had and obviously still has! I can see why you admire her. I'm not sure I would have stayed with him. Thank you for sharing and have a lovely day!
True that Liz, I can't imagine her strength. I don't have half of hers :) Thank you lots and have an equally lovely day :)
!PIZZA
Her strength is really admirable, and inspiring how she trust people even though they are hurting her.
That's right, it's unimaginable how she went through the emotional challenges. Thank you for your input :)
!CTP
The level of optimism and faith here dropped my jaws while reading.
She's the definition of faith.
I'm glad everything worked out for her because she deserves it.
She's admirable. Maybe if it was me, I ran away already. Thank you Johnsen :)
!PIZZA
Water rises to my eyes, amazing story, amazing woman , very strong.
She definitely is and I'm really proud to have known her :)
!PIZZA
I so love to hear every story of a resilient woman just like your friend. When the heart is pure, it always finds a thousands of reasons to understand despite the bad times and would always be very much willing to endure. How I love this week's question about the Ladies of Hive. How I wish I could also join here. Or am I too late for this prompt? Hehe. Thanks my dear friend farmgirl. Sending love and a big hug.
Of course you can join in CJ, anyone is welcome. Even men who talk about women are welcomed in the community :) The prompt is on until Saturday so you're not late, hop on!
Thank you for this, it's so beautiful :)
!LUV
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Awww looking forward yo submit an entry my dear friemd farm girl. Hehe. Thank you so much resilient girl.
Yay! That's awesome and I look forward to reading yours, CJ
this is wonderful. it's really inspiring and at the same time breathtaking to know such experience like this. women are truly strong.
It truly is. I wonder where such strength come from :) Thank you !LADY
Your friend is a true definition of an exceptional woman, her faith and believe saw her through those rough edges and I'm so glad it ends in happy ever after.
!luv
She truly is and I'm happy that it ended that way. It's unbelievable how she went through all she did even at a younger age. Thank you for the luv and here's to share some !LOL :)
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She’s really a strong woman, not all women can cope in such situations. Most of them would even abandon their kids. I’m glad things worked out for her afterwards. Thanks for sharing 🥹
She's an incredible soul indeed and thankfully, it turned out well.
Thank you so much for stopping by. I’m happy you like it🥹❤️
Wow what a credible woman and I really appreciate the woman for the strong heart she had because it not so easy to keep a man to yourself alone then if you now have the chance to keep one then keep him wisely and closely.
I admire them too of how strong they are because I don't have such a strength to do the same thing.
Women rock and she typifies it CJ😀
About time that the husband pulled his finger out.
I hated her husband for some years to be honest, lol!
!PIZZA
Oh I am not surprised..
It's a story of resilience and a lot of faith, sis. Your friend despite everything never lost faith that things would change, and that's so hard sometimes. It's a good thing she wasn't wrong in the end.
True sis. Sometimes it makes me question where their faith is coming from. Hers is quite the same as the life of my aunt's (the wife of my Dad's brother).
A great demonstration of maturity, responsibility, faith, optimism and empathy. When you say that the husband would change and the wife would get her son back, it is as if she had received a slap in the face, I would not be willing to do what she did, simply admirable.
!LADY
She is and I kind of felt guilty that I judged too soon back then and thought she was out of her mind. I even hated her husband for putting her through hard times. Then things turned around years after and I'd just be pinching myself each time I see them :)
That's life. The same thing happened to me with a friend, the bad thing is that it cost me the friendship, because I let my emotions intervene in a couple relationship. Big mistake.
Oh... Sorry to hear. That's one of the things we want to avoid, losing a friendship because we care quite too much at times.
Life been life jajaja don´t worry it happened several years ago.
Cheers :) We move on and live again hehe!
WOW! For your friend to have accepted the child in and took care of him like her child, then she must be a hero.
Thanks for sharing.
If you see it that way hehe :)
It's unbelievable how they can accept albeit it's hard. I also have an aunt (the wife of my father's brother) who did the same thing and the child is with her up until now. She met the child when my uncle died a few years ago.
Seriously?? No way! That surprised me! And renewed my faith in the meaning " For better or worse."
Yes, it's unbelievable but true. Something I couldn't comprehend how she and the other two women I know were able to "accept" things like they were easy. It's just beyond me :)
Wow... she must love the guy so much!!!
Persevering woman... she believed ... and she was not disappointed!
!LADY 😍🌺🤙
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She's one of a kind :) Thank you lots !LADY :)
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