Let's talk about women's empowerment! 👩💪 || Ladies of the Hive Community Contest #93 ✨[ESP-ENG]

in Ladies of Hive16 days ago

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Bienvenidos! || Welcome!

Hola Hivers! Espero que se encuentren de maravilla y que su día haya sido muy productivo, yo me encuentro excelente gracias a Dios, una vez mas me uno a este concurso semanal de esta hermosa comunidad dedicada a mujeres fuertes, guerreras, emprendedoras y con mucho que demostrar aquí en Hive, en esta ocasión respondiendo la siguiente interrogante: ¿Cuándo empezaste a ver que las actitudes hacia las mujeres cambiaban en tu vida y qué crees que impulsó esos cambios? Por favor, dé algunos ejemplos.

Antes de comenzar mi participación me gustaría invitar a @dimeshana y @bluevibes a que se unan también!

Hello Hivers! I hope you are feeling wonderful and that your day has been very productive, I am feeling excellent thank God, once again I join this weekly contest of this beautiful community dedicated to strong women, warriors, entrepreneurs and with a lot to prove here in Hive, this time answering the following question: When did you start to see that attitudes towards women changed in your life and what do you think drove those changes? Please give some examples.

Before I begin my participation I'd like to invite @dimeshana and @bluevibes to join in as well!

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👩💪 ¿Cuándo empezaste a ver que las actitudes hacia las mujeres cambiaban en tu vida y qué crees que impulsó esos cambios? Por favor, dé algunos ejemplos.

Creo que en mi caso nunca hubo un " No puedes hacer esto por que eres mujer ", mas bien era una forma distinta de decirlo, hablare un poco de mi experiencia y luego les contare sobre lo que visto a mi alrededor, mi padre es machista y controlador, nunca estuvo de acuerdo en que yo tuviera amigos varones ( los hice cuando entre a la universidad ), cada vez que salia con ellos ( a jugar juegos de mesa o simplemente charlar ) me recordaba que yo era una chica facil, que seguramente iba era a costarme con ellos cuando no era asi, el me recordaba que yo era mujer, que era débil de mente y cuerpo, que podría salir embarazada de cualquiera de ellos y arruinar mi vida por completo, que tener un novio o un encuentro casual con un chico ( sexualmente hablando ) seria mi perdición, en vez de explicar o decirme todas estas cosas con amor o paciencia lo hacia gritando o siendo agresivo, en vez de decirme que si alguien intenta abusar de mi debo defenderme y contárselo o que recuerde siempre tener la confianza de charlar sobre cualquier tema con el, no, esas eran cosas que solo los hombres podían hacer, las mujeres tenían que permanecer siempre encerradas en sus casas haciendo cosas de mujeres, incluso yo a esa edad ( 17 y 18 años ) ni siquiera había dado mi primer beso aun si que se podrán imaginar lo horrible que era escuchar acusaciones falsas sobre mi solo por ser mujer, mis amigos mas bien me protegían siempre, me buscaban y llevaban a casa, no dejaban que yo tomara alcohol, si me quería ir de algún lugar ellos me llevaban a mi casa, hasta ahora son los mejores amigos que he podido tener, me respetan muchísimo y me enseñaron a defenderme de cualquier hombre que quiera abusar de mi ( cosa que mi padre no hizo ), adicionalmente mi padre me quito el habla cuando me compre mis primeros lentes, si, estaba ciega, no veía bien y reuni con esfuerzo algo de dinero para yo mandarme a hacer mis lentes ( en ese entonces ya tenía trabajo ), el se molesto por que no era necesario invertir en mi salud, ese dinero tenía que dárselo a el, esto ocurría mas seguido de lo normal, cualquier cosa que me comprara estaba mal para el, lo último que le permití antes de irme de mi casa por que ya no soportaba mas agresión psicológica era que había conocido a mi pareja actual, el hombre mas maravilloso del mundo, mi padre se convirtio en mi enemigo número uno, todos los días me decía que me iban a engañar con otras mujeres, que seguro yo era una mas, que este hombre solo me iba a utilizar y dejar, fue tanto el acoso y el daño mental que sentí , que ya no pude mas y me fui de mi casa!

Que pude aprender de todas estas cosas?

Bueno, que ser mujer no significa tener una mente y cuerpo débil , que NO debo de estar encerrada en una casa limpiando y cocinando solamente puedo trabajar, tener hobbies, disfrutar de la vida, que mi cuerpo NO esta hecho para ser abusado y luego botado, que invertir en mi salud es mas importante que cualquier otra cosa, que tengo derecho a enamorarme y escoger un exelente compañero de vida, que puedo tener amigos hombres, que puedo irme de lugares donde sienta que las personas no me están sumando energías positivas, que me respeto, me valoro, me admiro, estoy orgullosa de ser y estar donde estoy, tengo un año y medio de relación con mi pareja donde soy inmensamente feliz y estoy construyendo mi hogar, me siento en paz, no me despierto con gritos o malos tratos, y saben que? Todo cambio cuando decidí no soportar mas el machismo que estaba viviendo, creo que eso es lo que impulso mi cambio, el no soportar a una persona toxica y controladora, el hacer escuchar mi voz, el empoderarme, trabajar duro y sacar de mi vida a aquellas personas que solo me quieren ver por el piso, los cambios que he visto de otras mujeres han sido por la misma razón , estamos cansadas de ser pisoteadas, de que nos quieran minimizar, burlar o hacer ver como menos, cuando somos mucho mas, cuando valemos mas que el oro, tu mujer que me estas leyendo, no permites que NINGUN HOMBRE te haga sentir menos, sea tu padre, hermano, amigo, pareja, no permitas que te metan en la mente cosas que no son ciertas, nosotras no vinimos al mundo para ser inferiores, estamos aqui para hacer escuchar nuestra voz! Triunfa por que eres como el sol radiante! Dios nos quiere ver gozando de la vida y triunfantes!.

👩💪 When did you begin to see attitudes towards women changing in your life, and what do you think prompted those changes? Please give some examples.

I think in my case there was never a "You can't do this because you are a woman", rather it was a different way of saying it, I will talk a little about my experience and then I will tell you about what I saw around me, my father is sexist and controlling, he never agreed that I had male friends (I made them when I entered the university), Every time I went out with them (to play board games or just chatting) he reminded me that I was an easy girl, that I was going to get it hard with them when I wasn't, he reminded me that I was a woman, that I was weak in mind and body, that I could get pregnant by any of them and ruin my life completely, that having a boyfriend or a casual encounter with a guy (sexually speaking) would be my downfall, instead of explaining or telling me all these things with love or patience he would do it by yelling or being aggressive, instead of telling me that if someone tries to abuse me I should defend myself and tell him or that I should always remember to have the confidence to talk about any subject with him, no, those were things that only men could do, women had to always stay locked up in their homes doing women's things, even me at that age (17 and 18 years old) I had not even had my first kiss yet so you can imagine how horrible it was to hear false accusations about me just for being a woman, my friends always protected me, they looked for me and took me home, they didn't let me drink alcohol, if I wanted to leave any place they took me home, until now they are the best friends I have ever had, they respect me a lot and they taught me to defend myself from any man who wants to abuse me (something my father didn't do), additionally my father took away my speech when I bought my first glasses, yes, I did not see well and I gathered with effort some money to send I to make my glasses (at that time I already had a job), he was upset because it was not necessary to invest in my health, he told me that I should have given that money to him instead of investing in my health, he didn't talk to me for about 2 weeks, this happened more often than usual, anything he bought me was wrong for him, the last thing I allowed him before I left home because I could not stand any more psychological aggression was that I had met my current partner, the most wonderful man in the world, My father became my number one enemy, every day he told me that they were going to cheat on me with other women, that for sure I was just another one, that this man was only going to use me and leave me, it was so much harassment and mental damage that I felt, that I couldn't take it anymore and I left home!

What could I learn from all these things?

Well, that being a woman does not mean having a weak mind and body, that I should NOT be locked up in a house cleaning and cooking, that I can work, have hobbies, enjoy life, that my body is NOT made to be abused and then thrown away, that investing in my health is more important than anything else, that I have the right to fall in love and choose an excellent life partner, that I can have male friends, that I can leave places where I feel that people are not adding positive energy to me, that I respect myself, I value myself, I admire myself, I am proud to be and be where I am, I have a year and a half of relationship with my partner where I am immensely happy and I am building my home, I feel at peace, I do not wake up with yelling or abuse, and you know what? Everything changed when I decided not to support the machismo I was living, I think that's what drove my change, not to support a toxic and controlling person, to make my voice heard, to empower myself, to work hard and get out of my life those people who only want to see me on the floor, the changes I've seen from other women have been for the same reason, we are tired of being trampled, We are tired of being trampled, of being minimized, ricudilized or made to look like less, when we are much more, when we are worth more than gold, you woman who is reading me, do not allow ANY MAN to make you feel less, be it your father, brother, friend, partner, do not allow them to put in your mind things that are not true, we did not come to the world to be inferior, we are here to make our voice heard! Triumph because you are like the radiant sun! God wants to see us enjoying life and triumphant!

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GRACIAS POR LEER! DIOS LOS BENDIGA! - THANKS FOR READING! GOD BLESS YOU!
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I can see that you are a strong woman.

It is hard for fathers to feel like they are protecting their families when rearing them, especially when they are getting up into the upper teens, and fathers that already have control issues complicate everything like your father did. It is extremely good that you were able to overcome that and move on, and become the woman you are now. You sound like you made major progress towards your strengths and have eliminated a lot of the other things that provide weakness. Onward and upward!!!

My daughter met a guy and ran away with him at 16 but didn't get pregnant right away. He kept trying to send her back, but we kept saying, no, you take her hahahahahahaha!!! 🤣 In seriousness, he did not feel right having her run away, she just hated any authority over her head, and it would not have mattered to her what it was; she even looks back on it now and says she made a major mistake, but that is what life is about, learning. So, it takes a lot of patience to bring up kids where they can learn enough and be protected enough to learn to deal with the world after leaving the nest.

!LADY

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Waww what a strong situation, but you are right, it served your daughter and all of you as a life lesson, sometimes we have to learn in very painful or incomprehensible ways, and yes! that was what happened, my father wanted to protect me or express his concerns but he did it through his childhood traumas, he wanted to give me the same abuse he received, he needs psychological help, I hope someday he takes it and realizes that the change to be a better person is in himself.

I am sorry that your growing up years were that way! I am so glad you found your self worth, despite all of that as well! You (as we all are) are beautiful in the eyes of our Creator, and very worthwhile. We all have a role to play in our lives that affect others around us (just look at how your male friends have positively changed you) Thank you for sharing and stay strong and beautiful! !LADY

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Thank you for your beautiful comment! God bless you! 💓💓💓💓💓💓

God bless you as well, my sister!😇🤗💜

IF I could only have listened in to your conversations with your father, I figure that he meant well but went about it the wrong way perhaps like his father before him. But he should realize your ability to make your own decisions and be confident in them.

That's exactly what happened, I don't hate him, in fact I love him and respect him a lot even though he didn't know how to communicate his concerns to me, he just went to all his childhood traumas and wanted to treat me the same way, I'm still trying to convince him to go to therapy, he needs psychological help 😊

Thank you for your entry to our weekly contest! 😊

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You are just all forms of amazing. This is one great piece, I don't even know where to start from in contributing 🤗🤗
I'm sorry for what touch went through with your Dad but I'm so glad that you found your voice and proved to him you are more than he thought you were. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful story. Accept these heart from me 💕 💞 ♥ 💜 💙 🧡 🤗🤗😊😊