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The prospect of rejection, creates inferiority as well as uncertainty. It's often even more painful to be rejected for what you do not have control over or. In life, we often admonish ourselves to see rejection as a stepping stone, especially when we know by default that it's a direct hindrance to perseverance.
Truth is, we often talk good, in our private spaces it's often difficult to replicate what we internally say to ourselves. Rather, we weep, lose, allow that pain crush us real bad, while pretending to be strong in public; in the gathering of friends, amidst acquaintances, colleagues or people we generally know. We humans are excellent judge of character unless we allow sentiments to actually dissuade us.
I've faced rejection a lot of times and I didn't take positive, I allowed the pain crush me and I took the lessons that came with it. A lot of times we learn even without knowing it, for someone like me, I learn from experiences that leaves a scar, either on me, or someone else because a lot of times it acts as a check to my excesses.
When I was younger, I didn't care about rejection I saw it as a usuality but when I grew older, I discovered that these rejections mostly happened as a result of things I couldn't control. Have you ever tried to bend the rules like trying to swim a tide, when the inevitability is certainly lethal? The fact that rejections happen for things you cannot control makes it hurt the more.
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It feels like fighting a force you cannot defeat. Truth is, you eventually want to prove a point by doing things differently, but you cannot. Rejection over things you cannot control is beyond depressing. It makes you feel like an actor in the grand scheme of life, playing to a particular script without a will of your own.
Will of expression is embedded into us, the reasons why we're what we are is because of the ability to meander beyond usuality, chose to be unique, chose to be expressive beyond limitations and sometimes when we cannot, it becomes more of an agony. I wouldn't like to begin to cite examples of rejections beyond control, at one time in our lives we've all faced it. Nevertheless, to many others it has become the basis of their existence.
The prospect of rejections raises red flags, it's difficult to be expressive, especially when you sense rejection. One of the reasons why a lot of people choose to be independent is because they might choose to be dependent and face the likelihood of rejection from things, circumstances or people they're counting on. Rejection is also feedback, a negative feedback which everyone fears and loathes.
Feedbacks improve our lives, either negative or positive, irrespective of the pain it leaves behind. But how many people are willing to continue facing the prospect of rejections every day simply because they want to learn? Sometimes we improve all aspects of our lives... be better, but what it that uncontrollable factor that will inevitably bring rejection still remains?
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Irrespective of our faults and failings, every functional human being with a mind craves acceptance, hell! Even animals craves love and acceptance. This means that our consciousness is all we need to seek and crave for it (acceptance) But then, our innate desires have raised the bar. When people feel that they meet a lot of requirements, they subconsciously raise the bar to rejecting people that doesn't meet those standards.
But then, there are standards we cannot reach and this is because we are not equipped naturally to do so and sometimes a lot of people expects us to and when we cannot, it becomes a prerequisite to base their stances of rejections, I'm slowly approaching my late 20s and from my experience, I've seen that we cannot Influence people to accept us because they do this on their own terms. (In my next post, I'll be talking about the most common reactions people are likely to cultivate when they're faced with rejection)
Interested in some more of my works?
Why Do Nigerians Choose To Dye Their Hair? (Feature Article)
How Life's Issues Prevents Us From Obligatory Priorities
A Sense Of Self Accountability: Why Minimalism Exceeds Beyond Spending Money.
A Taste Of You.... (POB WOTW) {An Original Poetry)
Causality & Common Sense: Some Answers To Most Plausible Questions?
My name is @Josediccus, a young Nigerian entrepreneur who is a Vlogger, A Psychologist, Poet, Sports Writer/Analyst & Personal Finance Coach. I'm using my contents as a process to create shared meaning as well as create expressions through which people on/off hive can relate. I believe content is a process to be enjoyed and relished and I'm up for any collaborations in my field stated above. Cheers
@Josediccus, your brother-in-pen & heart
I'm hoping to reach more people who are broken at heart and spirit, so share on any platform or reblog
Well written blog my man. I love the systematic approach with your writting. Often I'll say out loud while reading your stuff like but this or that... And then I read on and see that you taking us there already. It is almost like I can hear you saying calm down im getting to it😆
My main take away from your post. It is why we must find a way to stay grounded in our convictions and stay stead fast with focused thought/intention. No need to worry lest one wants to start worrying perpetually in thought.
We cant let others influence our morales, convictions and thoughts through emotions that carry attachments.
✌️💗😀
Sincerely, as a practical psychologist I have studied pattern and seen that this is often more difficult than it seem.
External feedback sometimes grounds our conviction and this is often determinant on the environment which we find ourselves. So many people develop an environment where they listen to external voices inadvertently more than they even do their own.
We have important figures in the society which we often deemed their opinion as the rule or as a statement of accuracy.
Uou can actually see how Elon musk influenced a lot of people especially when it came to doge coin.
It is the reason why we often should patent our own convictions while listening to external factors as an act of check and balance.
Thank you so much, many years ago, I didn't think I would come this far.
You are right and that becomes more of a mantra just to help get me out of the thought patterns that arise from external environmental factors that are far too influential on my thoughts as an empathetic person. I find my thoughts are extremely powerful and capable of manifesting great objectives with a clear head. Easier said than done on a city.
Environmental factors tend to mould individuals in a society. But when an individual starts the habit or repetition of a desired process then unneeded emotions like rejection from a dull society become a useless thing to even entertain. Much like the former smoker who simply started jogging until smoking was non essential.
When we find these individuals that are trying and trying, it is important to help them succeed and perpetuate that thought on them and others even if it doesn't seem fulfilling at the time. Thoughts are vibrations that ripple back to us imo.
Oh no im rambling and kind of steered away from the point maybe...
Nice article