Fear by TheDigitalArtist in Pixabay
Drowning strokes !
"Engagement is the best time to practice because you are not married yet.."
Shut up! You're not me!
"You insist on harassing our relationship. Of course, I'm not you. But, of the two of us, you seem to be a puerile insect and I, the voice of your reason, which is not much to say, because every time it seems that you have less elbow room, which puts me in a difficult situation because I am nobody in anybody's mind. An unpleasant ghost, it seems."
Fortunately, you are saying it and not me because you would call me hostile again when what I want is peace to live without pleasing someone inside me who is not me, but pretends to be the owner of my body and my mind. When were you going to tell me that you fell in love with that dull girl who aspires no more in life than to be the property of a man, an object of carnal desire with the status of a "lady"?
"You are definitely wrong. What do you mean, me? If you hide in corners of our mind, hidden from me from such lurid and deeply libidinous so that I do not restrain your impetus. The moral part and good principles of you, remained with me when you forked, who knows for what reasons and since when? Because I am strong, with light and voice since I know myself, but I do not recognize you... more and more dark and sour."
Then, the tracking seemed vivid and fascinating, yielding timely answers to an ever-changing riddle..
I simply want to be me, the way I am. Not an appendage of another. We should be one, without so many complications. Identify ourselves, give us a chance to be who we think we are. I, your emotional and visceral part, and you, my fussy and manipulative consciousness, leading me down paths that do not recognize my footprints. I, who when the river grows and sweeps everything away, does not take me and instead, instead of downstream, I find myself fighting with my hands against the current... And if not, why do you assume control when fear tries to paralyze and devastate me? Think about it...
"Picky and manipulative? Is that your conciliatory perception? Your fears suffocate me as much as they do you, but I don't run to hide behind your madness when responsibilities are pressing. It is time to take the bull by the horns and get serious, commitments are as much a part of life as that "freedom" you defend, which is just another fear. Fear of meeting again, fear of communicating with another, fear of exposing your true inner self. I'll tell you something... You are neither more nor less than anyone else".
The issue fell to screeching tiers. Coming to terms with oneself in times of strenuous stress can be laborious. Not all beings know how to surrender. Sometimes it is easier to dissociate oneself.
One should take the party in peace, nor you press me to assume a commitment for which I still do not feel prepared, nor I spit my fears in your face.
"Ah! at least you are accepting that you are dripping and your verbal diarrhea, added to a "controlled" dissociation, is nothing more than a mental ruse to shake the gift without trying to open it or see its contents... Drowning strokes! Then, if you are going to jump into the water!"
People by PublicDomainPictures in Pixabay
14/11/2020
In response to @mariannewest[3-Part Weekend Freewrite - 11/14/2020 Each message is highlighted in bold