Voices Carry
do not shine
for me.
No time
for me.
The clock keeps ticking...
My Sanity.
Tick. Tock.
Tick. Tock.
Flickering incandescence
The cold light of history.
Temporality.
Experiencing
Life
Through Mortality.
Belts and braces
Bars and bells
Under Lock and Key.
Insanity
Whispers...
Hear me.
In Solitary
Nothing prevails.
I scream.
To hear
Something.
Anything.
And Voices carry.
A sound
I cannot see
Another voice,
of Misery.
Floats softly back to me.
Do I knock it back?
Push it down?
Brave the day
Without a sound?
The pain
Echos
In my head.
The distant cries of a stranger
Words unsaid...
My only company.
And my clock...
Tick. Tock.
Tick. Tock.
The walls
Of Doubt
Enclose
Constrict
Impose.
A private cell.
My private Hell.
I fight to remember
I fight to forget
My life is not over.
The war not won...
yet.
Another hour
Another day
Time sweeps them all away.
Eventually.
The marks on my wrists
The barbs on my face
A lifetime of scars
These things...
can't be replaced.
I ask myself...
Why am I here?
What is my crime?
Why do I fear...
Doing this time?
I won't give up.
I've lived in sin.
My faith is strong
I let Him in.
I cry out loud.
What did I do wrong
To earn this...
Isolation song?
And voices carry...
This poem has been written in response to Blockchainpoet's weekly prompt: isolation. I wanted to try to give a sense of the feeling of desperation and how it impacts on the mental health of a prisoner enduring a spell in solitary confinement, doing everything they can to survive the experience, whilst it slowly tears them apart.
It seemed like the most hopeless and awful position to be in... I read a couple of articles about solitary confinement and, in particular, Florida's terrible record for having way too high a percentage of their prison population in solitary at any one time... and using solitary cells simply because of prison space issues and because it is easier to hide the problems of ill-discipline away than to deal with them and rehabilitate properly. So many people end up in isolation for periods far longer than mandated or allowed by statute... but there is no justice for this kind of thing. (I have added this in from a comment I made below as I felt it helps to explain my thinking at the time of writing which i probably should have done from the start).
Edit: The point has been raised that the experience is not so much unlike the experience of living through and with depression. Now, I don't live with depression myself, but I have experienced depression in my life. I had the joy of being placed in a medical state of depression for a few minutes by a specialist who was running tests to check my body's response to shock. Long story! Anyway... I was injected with adrenaline to see what my body would do and it responded apparently as expected... but I started sobbing my heart out. I felt the most incredible sadness come over me like a dark cloud. It consumed me: my thoughts, my feelings, my everything. I couldn't process past the singular sense of despair and futility, hopelessness and helplessness, and the most immense sadness I have ever felt. My mom asked me why I was crying... and my answer... I don't know... I just feel so incredibly sad and miserable. The doctor apologised to me, informing me that he had caused the state of temporary depression and that he would give me another injection which would neutralise the first and make everything better. He did. And it did. If only it were that easy in real life. If only there was a quick fix for the torturous hells that so many have to endure.
For things like depression, we can take a pill, work on our lifestyle, and improve our habits, and our mental health. For all else, and some may argue for depression too we can turn to Faith to guide us through the darkest hours.
Header image Confinement by Lindsay_imagery in Canva pro
Dreemport banner used with permission of @dreemsteem and @dreemport and designed by @jimramones
And you did a brilliant job at it!!! 👌👌👌 That was super intense dear Sam, I could really relate to the feeling when I was going through my worst phase of depression...
So well phrased 🙌👍
!LUV !HBITS
I haven't written a poem in ages. It felt like it was time again 🤗 It was the first thing that came to mind when i saw the prompt. Thank you for reading it, my lovely and for the kind words. I am so glad that a lot of that time is behind you now.I can't imagine what it must have been like to have to endure those feelings over an extended period like that !LUV !ALIVE
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This almost got me crying, I remember when I was thrown in prison for no cause, here in Nigeria there's nothing like human rights observed. I felt like I was in the deepest part of hell, my throat went completely dry, my tears dried up that night, I was confined for 24hrs and in that 24hrs I saw hell and I pitied the rest of the prisoners who had crimes solely attached to their names. It's actually a very terrible experience. Nice lines BTW
I'm so sorry that my words impacted you in this way😢 It seems to have had quite the effect on a few people - not at all how I expected either. It's pretty awful how human rights are just thrown into the wasteland by so many countries and so many abusive regimes. I hope you never have to experience anything like that again, my friend !LUV !ALIVE
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We're currently in a very abusive regime no doubt and everyday sucks. Sometimes I just feel like running away but the distance is one hell of a barrier. Lol
Thanks for the tokens 🤍
Sending you so much love, my friend. We can only pray for change. I'm so sorry that you have to live like this 😢Keep looking up❣️ !LUV
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Thank you 🥺🤍
oh Sam... this was TERRIBLE.
and when I say terrible -i mean that you EXPRESSED this hell SO well, that i felt every bit of it in each word!!! i wanted to claw out of my own skin by the end!
which means you wrote it PERFECTLY. wow. i can't say i loved it. hahahaha i hated it. but I think that means you were a master at writing it... so, in that case - i loved your skill!!!!
is this the weirdest comment you've ever gotten??? LOL i hope so. cuz i like to stand out HAHAHAHAHAHAH
i love you - 8!!
Can I give you worst comment of the day 🤣 ROFLLLLL (but can I also agree... that the poem is terrible - as in terribly sad)
I really don't know why I wrote it. I just felt like writing a poem. I haven't written one in ages...so I dropped into blockchain poets and picked up their latest prompt and wrote about the first thing that came to me. It seemed like the most hopeless and awful position to be in... I read a couple of articles about solitary confinement and, in particular, Florida's terrible record for having way too high a percentage of their prison population in solitary at any one time... and using solitary cells simply because of prison space issues and because it is easier to hide the problems of ill-discipline away than to deal with them and rehabilitate properly. So many people end up in isolation for periods far longer than mandated or allowed by statute... but there is no justice for this kind of thing.
I'm sorry it wasn't a joyful reading experience. Not sure it was a joyful writing one either 🤔
Love you 8 too 💞
!LUV !ALIVE
edit: hehe you know I tease... this was a great comment! Thank you 🤗
it really is the worst comment - but think... you'll never forget it ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
but you really did write it so powerfully - and so REAL Sam. which is why i really did not like the content but loved the expert description. i know it makes no sense hahaha but... there you have it
and i am daring to say 7 now.
cuz.... cuz i want to LOL
i am close enough to 7 in my head that i say 7 damn it!!! LOLOLOL
and now to go make my hair pretty for that 7!!!
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Hi @samsmith1971,
Thank you for participating in the #teamuk curated tag. We have upvoted your quality content.
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Thank you @teamuk, always appreciated !PIZZA
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I'm inspired. And to think I read this as the first thing this morning. Thank you @samsmith1971 . I now know there are many channels to hear from him.
Thank you buezor. This inspires me. Indeed very many channels for He is everywhere 💗🙏 !LUV !ALIVE
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I just knew you would nail it! The echoes life carry is painful and choking especially when one is confined.
I am sorry you had to go through that and I do agree with your last paragraph.
aw, thank you for coming to visit my poem, my lovely. There is always hope, right? No matter how dark and lonely things may get sometimes 🙏💗 !LUV !PIZZA
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Nice poem. You're good at it. It's hard to create a poem with one word per verse that can clearly understand, but you nailed it. Thanks for sharing your talent.
Anyways, I was sad after reading your explanation regarding the poem. You have depression. That's one thing people can't joke about. It's hard to control, and yeah. Feeling so sad and miserable in an instant is usual for depression. I hope you're having a good day today. Stay awesome! ❤
Got your post in @dreemport.
Thanks for dropping by and for your wonderful comment. I don't suffer from depression but I do know what it feels like as I have experienced it before - when a doctor injected me with adrenaline to mimic depresssion in the body to see how my body would react... it's a long story... not one for now !LOLZ But it means I can relate to those who are suffering with depression because I understand how awful and hopeless it feels. !ALIVE !LUV
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Wherever he wants.
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That's good to hear that you already survived that depression thing. Anyways, do you mind creating an article regarding that injected adrenaline on you? HAHA. I'm wondering what happened and I'm sure it's interesting. 🙈
You did very well with the Poem writing Nice one
Came from @dreemport
Thank you, Sommy 💗!LUV
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Thanks @luvshares
You are highly welcome 😁
This is so outstanding and beautifully made. It told a lot about how the feeling of isolation is. Depression is real.
Nice poem.
Thanks so much for sharing
With love ❤️
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Thank you Prate Q - I'm happy that you enjoyed it! !LUV !PIZZA
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This is a fantastic job and you nailed it.
I believe in your masterpiece writing for a long time now.
Isolation is killing, we should all avoid it.
Thank you for this wonderful post.
Thanks for dropping in. I appreciate your kind words. I will keep writing to improve 💗😎 !PIZZA !LUV !ALIVE
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Well appreciated 🤙
This is such an amazing and important poem Sam!! Knowing that the prison system was the initial inspiration when you read the prompt makes me feel grateful, so many are forgotten once they are behind bars. Out of sight, out of mind...
There's some admission of being less, just by being given the title "prisoner". Not many feel bad for a prisoner, even though we all know of corruption and the human tendency to be unfair at times. It's hard to define what is just, but sometimes it is cut and dry. Forced solidary is torture, and you wrote that so vividly!
Thank you so much for sharing this!
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Although I am not a person of faith, I found your text moving. Particularly the opening resonated with me. One small criticism - 'echoes' I believe. Minor typo.