One of the things that makes a relationship last is, not only caring what is in it for me, but looking to provide value for them too. In my opinion, friendships have to be win-win and when one side is consistently giving more than the other, while the other happily takes, it tends not to workout so well.
As I have said before - I go long and I tend to build lasting relationships and a couple days ago I had a session with a client I have been training for almost a decade. He is not that much younger than I, but he was beginning his real career when we started together and over the years, it has been very much a win-win relationship. As I have helped him develop in various ways to move through his very large and global organization, he has also helped me get work helping his people in similar fashion.
What I do isn't special in anyway and I think many people could do it, but most will not, because they see the relationship as transactional in the moment, meaning that most people want something now for the effort put in. However, over the course of the decade and in combination with other people I enable within the organization concurrently, we together have been able to build what is similar to a decentralized network that is able to coordinate activities amongst the various nodes and get things done in ways that this large and very traditional company hasn't before, with literally a handful of key people spread across the organization.
Sure, it took ten years (so far) but the value this group has generated is quite incredible and now, they all hold trusted positions throughout the organization, with many not even knowing that they are all linked together. Out of all the things I have done in my business, this highly functional group is probably the best showcase of what a little discussion can accomplish.
And yes, we haven't filled a form, done a post-it-note on the wall workshop, had trust camps or any other consultant nonsense, we have just sat down regularly and chatted about things. Not even work related things most of the time and often, quite personal things. They know me well, I know them well. We are friends and as such, have each other's best interests at heart.
You see, as I have said many times most likely and why my content is as long and varied as it is, is that in order to really build lasting positive change, we have to onboard a new mindset, learn new skills and build a fundamental understanding of the world and our place in it.
This is not an overnight exercise, it is not through a leadership getaway, it is through experience and reflection, something that not many of us naturally do and not many more have a process that makes it habitual. Most of us, just do what we do on default, with very little thought or attention on whether our processes are working. To develop the personal practices for process success (outcomes vary), it takes time, effort, intention.
My client might be moving roles soon and into a position with another one of the nodes in a "getting the band back together" event to establish a new division and get it up, running and returning value rapidly, with "rapid" being a couple years. I don't know if I have a role there as a facilitator or enabler, but I am pretty excited to see what they can do.
Similarly, I myself have been contemplating my own position in my employed work and questioning if it is the right place for me under current conditions. With the pre-summer health event taking a heavy toll on my capabilities and the constant reminder of how much has changed, it could be that moving into a new role I do not have experience in could give me the "clean slate" to step back, evaluate and reconfigure myself in alignment with unfamiliar conditions. As kismet would have it, a role did open up and I have been recommended for it.
But, the main question I have to ask myself is, "can I make it a win-win relationship?" The reason is that in order to have opportunity in the future, I have to take care of the present and if I am unable to deliver a win for those involved, I am unable to get the win for me down the track. So, this is something I have to contemplate, because one thing I don't like doing is letting people down and, I do have to consider my own position and limitations too. After all, it is meant to be win-win and for me, there is more to a personal win than a monetary result - especially now.
I am in the unusual position currently that I need to work, but I don't need to work for a few extra euros here and there. I am confident that even in the bear market, I will have enough value in streams trickling in that I can do something I enjoy, rather than something I have to do because of a paycheck. The position on offer might very much be, something I enjoy as while I like my job now, I don't get to build long-term relationships with my clients directly, whereas the new role is closer to what I do for my business, so I get to spend many months and potentially years with those I enable. I like seeing people progress.
If I am deemed or deem myself unsuitable for the position, then I will happily stay where I am for now, but it has been interesting to consider over the last week or two and strangely, I have had a few events fall in my lap where I have been able to use the very skills I would need, plus events that reinforce why I would be good at it, like the discussion with my client about his own progression.
It would mean more work though probably - and that always comes with its own problems like - when do I find time to manage all my crypto nonsense? Well, we'll see how it goes.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
Don't compare yourself with the perfect, imaginary candiate. Compare yourself with your likely competitors. You're better than you're giving yourself credit for.
I think I can get it, but I just wonder if I am able to actually give it what I think it deserves. The (probably) tiny bit more money isn't the factor , at least for some time to come. I need more incentive than money :)
I follow other author on hive but less i observed so consistent and continual in writing without bothering the market .
Passion of writing and earning through is something like generate extra income as a reward which surely make you feel proud and encouraged.
The thing that gives me some confidence, is that it isn't only writing now, though this is a big part of it. Splinterlands, some pooling, curation... there are a few trickles.
Great article. 👏
I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment. 💯 My mom thought me about codependence at a very young age, and she has engraved this notion in my brain.
A couple of things I found of note:
This. This right here is super relatable. I don't think there's a human alive that hasn't thought about their worth at some point.
Delayed gratification is a bitch. 😂 It's so hard not to be absorbed by the moment and just have perspective. It goes against our nature as human beings, me thinks.
We have to give in order to receive. If more people lived by this message, the world would be a much nicer place.
We'll get there eventually. 🍻
This is why so many people don't get to where they imagine they would get - they don't control themselves for long enough.
I agree. most people worry about "fairness" though.
It is a mission that don't need to be eradicated instead focus and self determination can achieve a win-win situation when embarking on such journey.
Good understanding between each other is another source of win-win relationship. I appreciate your choice of topics and the way you right your blogs. I wish I were also a good writer like you 😊
It really just takes practice and some thought to write half decently - most people just write as they please, without the intention of improving along the way.
I am in this situation, thank you for sharing an article that made me realize many things.
I think your long writing is letting your emotional intelligence run dry. Write as much as you like. You have sensible texts.
I think it fills it up :)
Like the old say goes Nothing ventured, nothing gained. It is hard, it is worrisome, and it is scary stepping out of a comfort zone one has had for several years. I completely felt like a fish out of water when I had to move off the floor and into the office environment. It was a hard and difficult transition because I also had to learn to be a nine to fiver type person where I had always been a shift worker.
Risk tolerance is not much different in jobs than it is in finances. It is a hard and difficult road, but it can be oh-so rewarding during the transition and finding a new level of comfort.
I it is the "new level of comfort" I am looking for at the moment as currently, I don't feel like I fit my own skin. This could be partly due to me eating too much, moving too little also :)
That is just a hazard of the mid 40's, late 50's we somewhat get it back under control. (or I did sort of).
I didn't know that Kismet is also an English word. We have kısmet in our language and means destiny. Probably, has Arabic root.
Yeah it has I think. I know that it is used in Yiddish also.