I put one foot in front of the other. So grateful for my body's ability to move. To carry me from one place to the other. For giving me the ability to dance, in such a wonderful way, a way in which I get to express myself. My body allowing me to run, to jump to climb, I am so grateful for it all.
I envisage my body whole and pain free.
Over the last few years, I have been experiencing some back pain. Sometimes it is a twinge here and there, other times it has me confided to my bed.
Yesterday, I was collecting water. Something I do everyday, carrying two buckets from the water source to my truck, which I then use for washing. As I bend to lift up one if the buckets, I felt my back give out.
I walked towards my truck, walked up the steps and went to lie down on my bed. The pain going from my back, down my legs. A trapped nerve perhaps?
And here on my bed I still lie. Each time I have to rise, I roll onto my side and push myself up onto my hands. I then move along my bed until I reach the end and am able to pullyself up with the help of my bookcase.
All the while, I am in pain. Once I begin to walk it eases a little. Standing and sitting are painful. So lying is my best bet right now. But sleeping is not easy. It's hard to find a comfortable spot to lie in. I use cushions to elevate my knees a little, so as to keep the pressure off, my back.
I'm also using CBD oil, taking it orally and rubbing it onto my lower back. It is certainly bringing me some relief.
I'm struggling with being able to just rest, there is a lot that needs to be done and there are only so many times, I can ask my daughters to help, before I start getting inpatient. They have been pretty helpful, but I can't expect them to wait on me. They have their own things to do.
I know that what I am experiencing, is deep rooted. It's not just a case of making a wrong move. For sure the move I made, may have been a trigger, but so too has my poor sleeping pattern and my ability to push myself, both emotionally and physically. Cos I have to. Being a solo parent, means I can't afford to slack off.
There is no one for me to turn too, for respite. That's what it's like when you choose to move away from your home country. No aunties or Grand parents to step in.
I've been getting better at being more gentle and attentive with myself, but it seems I still have a bit to go.
I do have an appointment on Thursday with a physiotherapist. Who also does release work, taking the time to delve deep and identify the real issue at play.
But for now, I envisage my body healthy and strong. Focusing on what I know it is capable of, so that I can aid the healing process.
You know, I wasn't going to do this, but my Mum would say it to me so I'm going to pass the torture on.
Squats.
Yep. Squats. Preventative medicine is EVERYTHING especially at our age. SEriously, I had the worst back pain for a year and could hardly do anything. It was awful. I'm terrified of being back there so I listen to my Mum and do squats and sit ups every day. Not heaps - like 10 - 15, and hold chair pose for as long as I can, and about twenty sit ups. But it helps.
Then again, I want to tell my Mum, sometimes life's jsut giving you a lesson, and no amount of preventative exercise will help that!
HOpe you recover soon and find your ways through the pain. Thanks for the reminder to put my amanita cream together too, I've been wanting to do it for ages but keep forgetting. It's meant to be good for topical pain relief!
Thank you. Yeah I need to get better with preventative care. I still squat a bit in my day to day life , but not enough to keep my core strong. Thank you for the reminder. I'm trying to improve my overall self care. Had a big break through today though. Xxxxx
Omg :(
Nightmare with your lifestyle and two kids. Solo.
Today's Thursday.
Let me know how it went, please.
Thank you, it has been challenging but today also brought me a lot of insight and I felt things shift.
I just wrote about it.
I have 3 girls actually, but they have been helpful, so I am blessed there.
I Hope all is well with you xxxxx
Ah... I'm so glad you were courageous enough to allow it to rise!!!
I find the dancing shakes things up, btw. Out of the body and back up to the subconscious towards the conscious.
An opportunity to heal properly when this happens if we snatch it!
Perhaps that injury was a boon. :)
Apologies. Three (! Whew) girls. Wow. You are one powerful woman! 💥🔥