Thanks, man, for sharing this story... It was different in the 90s, and I can attest that I had a similar (or no) relationship with my father... Times were different, connections weren't made, and even in adulthood, it's hard to "re-connect"... In the end, being a father today, it's different, but in a way, the same... Despite not telling "those words", we know that they were there for us, in their "specific" way...
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Thank you so much for sharing the little slice of your story here too. I am encouraged by the open-ness of the hive community to each share their story- you're not the only one who has done so in the comments today!
I tend to "collect" my friend's dads as selected family now. My wife's father is a brilliant man, who has no trouble expressing love, but we all have our flaws - his is drinking - he is not violent or destructive, but the damage it is doing to his health hurts me, because I really do love him.
Well, sometimes the only thing we can do is just accept them as they are, with all their flaws and goods... The "drinking" side is unfortunately very well present in my family, so I understand partially your point...