Fuente
The Ink Well Fast and Furious Festival - Day 1/ Good luck/ short story/ by @gilliatt
Fuente
After spending five years in college, and being the youngest graduate in my class, it was so ironic that my first act out of law school involved murder for hire.
It was the grayest afternoon I had ever seen in my life, and it was logical, I was about to interfere in an act that if I made the slightest mistake, I would lose not only everything I owned at that moment, but also what I could have, or dream of having in the future, but I was forced to, at least I thought so.
It was one of the most complex situations of my life, that despite my young age, I had passed every calamity, that nothing would surprise me.
Starting with that little sexual encounter in high school, which ended in a near-forced marriage and the birth of the triplets, almost ending my college career.
It was after four in the afternoon when he finally arrived, he was an extremely tall and robust man, with a very cloudy appearance, he sat down without saying a word and just looked at me, I managed to control my nervousness and tried to speak to him as if it were something that towards every day, and started:
- Hello, am "Wilson", (remembering Tom Hanks), nice to meet you, you're a little late.
- Hello, I had to verify that nobody followed me.
- Well, here we are.
- You will say.
- What should I call you?
- Call me Ilianovich, he said with a frown, and looking at me with those blue eyes without any kind of shine or sign of life.
(If they had asked me, they would have bet, by his look, that the man was dead).
- I began to explain to he my wife's illness and the reason why she should have an "accident" that she should not survive.
- Don't tell me who she is, just tell me how she is, who, it's just your problem.
(Ilianovich stared at me, this time with a smile that gave me chills).
- She is a woman, tall, blonde, very thin due to her illness, she wears a sling on her left arm, and a wound on her cheekbone on the same side, which was made when she fell due to losing her balance.
- Where do you want? .....Do You understand me.
- Preferably when leaving the hospital, tomorrow will go to consultation, I will be at home with the triplets.
- My rate is 3000 Euros, and my guarantee is that if I get caught, I won't say a single word.
(I shuddered when I saw those twisted teeth, it was the closest thing to a shark I had ever seen).
- Okay, I'll give you half now, and when it's done, the other half.
This gave a blow to the table, before sentencing:
- The payment is unique and in advance
(I just looked at the scar that crossed his face, it seemed that he had sewn himself)
- Okay, (I handed him the envelope)
- Ready, the next thing you will hear about this, will be on the news.
I stayed in the cafe, thinking that it would have been easier to take out life insurance for natural death, and not be, about to commit a madness like that, all because my ill wife had declared her terminal illness and could only be charged the policy if your death was caused by accidental or violent death. (I told myself that this was an incitement to murder, a very difficult crime to prove, and that it gave me headaches, when we saw it in the fifth year of law school).
At night I couldn't sleep, Angelica only told me that I should be very strong, that I should think about the future of the girls, that I calm down.
Love, remember: the death is part of life, and I do not intend to die in pieces suffering, I prefer it to be like that, quick and merciful, go to sleep, you should not stay up late.
I thought that despite everything, I had come to love her, and my throat tightened at the thought that I would never see her again.
It was during pregnancy that the doctors diagnosed her with imperfect osteogenesis, better known as the crystal bone disease, and after the triplets were delivered, every week at least one bone broke, and by now, she had given up, I just wanted to stop suffering.
In the morning I fell asleep, for a few minutes, enough for Angelica to go out, without me realizing it.
When I woke up, I jumped up, and just ran, I had to prevent that plan from being carried out, after all, I was a man of laws, and the law, if discovered, would be implacable with me.
But when I got to the hospital, I could only see people around a body in the middle of the street, I approached terrified to discover that the victim, although I knew that face well, was not Angelica, it was Ilianovich, who had been run over by a school bus.
When I got closer, I could see the gun lying on the pavement and the police badge that came out of her bloody jacket, later Angelica was on a stretcher, being treated by the doctors, who had suffered a heart attack, as a result of the shock upon seeing Ilianovich, fly through the air, while explaining something of a conspiracy to assassinate her.
I headed straight for the house to take care of the triplets, until the phone rang, I picked up the receiver and only heard the voice on the other end, which informed me that Angelica did not survive the shock of the accident and was pronounced dead at eleven thirty in the morning.
And here I am, taking care of these three girls from hell, with a fund of 750,000 dollars in the bank, wondering if this idea that is spinning in my head, will not be too much abuse of my good luck.
#theinkwell #fastandfurious #writing #fiction #character #dialog #story #writerdevelopment #comedy #like
Excellent post, I am fascinated by your stories, always well constructed from beginning to end, I like that you have been original, thanks for writing.
Thanks to you for your interest and follow-up, I am very pleased with the support, thank you for reading me, I look forward to your participation.
How deliciously twisted your tale is
I enjoyed it very much
On a separate note, I am not sure if you just wanted a prompt to inspire the story or if you actually want to be part of the fast and furious challenge...
What a good story, it surprised me several times in the development of the events.
Excellent, I think you have a talent for this, go ahead and don't be discouraged. 👍 Congratulations. @gilliatt
Hello partner, the story you created contains as a moral the conflicts of decisions.
I'll give you some notes to improve the dialogues:
As always a fan of your stories, my friend.
I leave you two links that I have used to improve:
I really appreciate your tips, in fact I was completely unaware that in English the quotation marks marked the dialogues, in Spanish they are used to quote verbatim, I write in Spanish and do the translation into English, hence the error, thank you for following me.
Don't worry, I really like the way you write.
Hello @gilliatt, did you read and comment on anyone else's work? If so, can you add the link to each of the comments to this comment on Day One of the festival.
Your imagination is good for your story. "taking care of these three girls from hell". I was just wondering about the use of the phrase since I thought the girls babies.
The tasks for Day 1 cover 3 different assignments.
I come to read the participations to catch up.
I would have liked you to follow the instructions, like everyone else, so that I could read you with the same criteria and give my opinion on what you worked on in the workshop.
Greetings, @gilliatt.
It is correct, apparently I did not understand the task well, and @dwixer had already exposed it, but it was a bit late, I still had fun writing, greetings.
Greetings @dwixer, among the rules it establishes that I must work on the proposed dialogue or create my own, of course I opted for the second option, imagine the scenario of 20 or 30 writers, developing the same task, with the same topic in a paragraph of 69 words, I think the result would end up repeating itself over and over again, hopefully the moderators, @jayna or @shanibeer, will clarify this question, thank you very much for stopping by, reading and commenting, really thanks.
I think it refers to the dialogue, I will wait for the clarification, I still enjoyed writing it a lot, thanks for your interest and help, I really appreciate it a lot.
@gilliatt, it looks like you had fun with this!
But yes, @dwixer is correct. There were two assignments that were very specific. One was to write three paragraphs - describing the traits of each of the three characters as you imagine them from the bit of dialog. The other was to write your own dialog that is 70-100 words.
I see what you mean about the same thing occurring over and over if all of the participants follow those instructions, but actually no two writers ever come up with the same thing based on the same prompt.
It's okay. You wrote a story, and how can that be a bad thing? :-)