I'm responding to @theinkwell's invitation to participate in his new initiative:
The Ink Well Weekly Fiction Prompt #1: Heart and Soul
With the romantic invitation of this contest I have prepared for your readings this exercise:
Far away spring
"She must be running around in the woods," thinks the mother as she imagines her picking blackberries, currants, mushrooms, wild flowers, in the soft warmth of a mid-spring afternoon.
Indeed, as she weeds her garden, she sees her daughter appear, comes from the woods. She brings her basket overflowing with flowers and fruit.
The mother sits down by an old apple tree to rest while the daughter arrives. She cannot take her eyes off her.
The girl arrives, places her harvest on the mother's brown skirt. As the girl shows her treasure, the mother watches her: her blonde hair covering the rosy cheeks, the smoothness of her hands delivering the fruit, the rattle of her voice and her laughter. She is beautiful, is thirteen years old.
A fleeting thought crosses her mother's mind.
"Did you go to the forest alone,Analiesa?" The question came out of the mother's mouth without having decided to ask it. In the same way, impulsively the daughter answered "Yes, mother, you know I like to be alone, so I can think.".
It really is like that. In company, Annaliesa is a breath of fresh air, a source of joy, a gentle word. She knew that the life of peasants is not always easy. When she was alone, the young girl immersed herself in a world of fantasies, of imaginary friends, fairy godmothers, fairies, elves... it had always been like that, until the beginning of this spring.
Now she loved to be alone to think about Detrich. She had seen him the first time among a group of young riders crossing the road near the stream. She was gathering firewood, with other friends, to fuel the bonfire with which her village was celebrating the coming of spring. The group came from a village larger than Anneliesa's, 20 minutes away on horseback.
The encounter between the young riders and the young girls filled the silent forest with words. Detrich and Anneliesa exchanged glances. At one point, amidst the laughter and banter of the lively group, the young man stood up and approached a fir tree. As the group of riders took their leave, Detrich handed Anneliesa a sprig of the fir tree.
"I will be for you like this tree, I will wait for you here from the ninth hour, every Sunday of this spring".
The parents in the village did not hear of the young people's meeting, nor did anyone else hear of Detrich's promise.
Anneliesa kept the sprig of fir, but did not attend the next Sunday. On the second Sunday she did come, accompanied by Griselda, whom, without telling her of her ulterior motives, she had invited to take a bath in the stream. As they approached the river pool, they saw the young man sitting near the fir tree.
This time the three young people talked for a long time. Anneliesa learned that Detrich came from a family belonging to the carpenters' guild. The girls talked about the fertility of their village and the busy agricultural festivals they prepared. Detrich wanted to attend these festivals and Anneliesa began to dream of a wider world.
As the feast of St. John approached, the young people already knew that they were keeping a secret of love between them.
They continued to meet at the stream, Detrich carved a heart for each meeting, each time on a different tree. At the last meeting, before the feast of St. John, he asked his sweetheart for permission to visit her at home, and told her that his parents wanted to meet her.
Anneliesa was overcome with fear. What would her parents say?
That evening when she got home, she did not fill her basket with flowers or fruit. She only put in small branches from the fir tree where Detrich always waited for her.
"I want to tell you something," she said to her mother as she placed the contents of her basket on her skirt.
The mother looked at her strangely.
In response, the girl went into the house. She came out with the branch of the fir tree that Detrich had given her the first time. She approached her mother and placed the old branch on the fresh ones.
Then, with her head down, she said: "I have a suitor. His parents want to meet us".
On Midsummer's Day the Bergers' house was decorated with garlands. In the early afternoon, a carriage arrived punctually in the village.
The entire community welcomed them.
Amidst dances, wreaths of flowers, fruits and songs Anneliesa and Detrich experienced the best spring of their lives.
Thank you very much for reading
This is is beautiful story of young love. Takes me back to simpler times when love blossomed in nature and not behind a screen.
Thank you for reading my story, @litguru. I believe love still springs from nature, in the simple complexity of the great wonder of life. It would be so nice to be able to enjoy it that way...But we humans like to complicate things. That's the way we are.
Great comment, @litguru. I have to agree.
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ENGAGEtokens.As I was reading, I was trying to place the time of the story. It was clear that this was a rural area, but I wanted to have a sense of time. First I thought 19th century, but then it became more noticeable: Middle Ages. A beautiful story, with shades of uncertainty, but peaceful and with a happy ending.
Thanks for reading, @morey-lezama. There's no way that the presence of a young girl in a forest can't cause us uncertainty, after so many years of hearing about Little Red Riding Hood. I too was a little disturbed at first but I preferred the path of simplicity and the peaceful unfolding of events. The enjoyment of love without pain. A little rest after so much blood has flowed in literature.
Thank you for reading and sharing feedback on this story, @morey-lezama!
!ENGAGE 10
ENGAGEtokens.Hello @gracielaacevedo,
This story is rich in the symbolism of life and fertility. You provide the reader with a feast of youth, and burgeoning love. It is springtime "the best spring in their lives". I enjoyed reading this very much.
Thank you for your reading and generous opinion, @agmoore.
When I think of love I think of the powerful forces of life, celebration and homage to nature.
I also enjoyed writing a lot.
Thanks for taking care of the source.
This is a very charming story, @gracielaacevedo. It has a timeless feel to it, though it takes place some time in the past when horses and carriages were the primary modes of travel.
When I started writing I was thinking about the birth of love in an adolescent couple.
Certainly that happens in a timeless way. Nevertheless, I incorporated some clues about time: the use of carriages and horses, the proximity of the forest, the celebration of spring with bonfires, the presence of the guilds (carpenters and peasants), the use of the ninth hour as a reference to measure daily time ... Annaliesa's age gives the most important clue, although it is perhaps a little cryptic. In medieval times young people came of age at the age of twelve.
I'm glad you liked my work, @theinkwell.
Thank you for sharing those details! It's lovely to see the writer's mind at work and learn about the thinking that went into a particular tale.
Hi, @gracielaacevedo. Your story is lovely. I didn't feel the dramatic arc, however on rereading I discovered this detail.
That sentence (by the way, well placed) invites me to uncertainty or disjunction. Bravo!
I also like this sentence. I think it's a beauty.
It was a pleasure to read you!
Hello @marcybetancourt. Thank you for your reading and comment. In a way I like that you didn't feel the narrative arc, it means to me that the story unfolds smoothly despite the constraint of the limited length.
As far as the narrative arc of the main character is concerned I point to the tremendous change in Anneliesa as she grows from a girl to a woman.
As far as the story arc in the plot is concerned, I am relying on the reader's prior information as to certain information of the time in which the events take place. Anneliese will leave the countryside for a more economically developed city, she will change social strata with the consent of her own and her fiancé's parents.
That is a big social change. At some point she feels fear: (children at the time were the property of the family without the ability to decide. Women had even less capacity to make decisions...)
She resorts to symbolic elements to express herself. The culture did not yet have a discourse for romantic love. I think my story tells of that transformation a little bit.
Receive a hug.
Thank you for reading @gracielaacevedo's work and commenting, @marcybetancourt!
Hello @gracielaacevedo I love your timeless story of a far-away land.
When younger, I loved to read fairy tales and stories related to the Medieval or Middle Ages periods. Your reference to peasants and suitor made me think of this. Also, the fact that Analiesa and her parents lived in the countryside. That's where the lower-class people lived. Detrich was probably one class above them. Yes, peasants had a hard life under the feudal system. It was a simple way of life, but hard.
Detrich giving Analiesa a twig from a fir tree is symbolic. She knew that he was declaring his intentions to her and didn't take her lightly. He was showing her his strength. The mother knew what the fir tree symbolized also. She knew her daughter had found a dedicated suitor.
I read your story as I would have a fairy tale where all ends well.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Thank you for your nice and informed comment, @justclickindiva.
I think you have been able to read in my exercise situations that are not expressly said but are tacit and/or form part of the substratum that the reader contributes. As some scholars say, readers finish writing the books.... You imagined the conflict (which at some point may arise because of the different social backgrounds of the bride and groom) and resolved it, reading the significance of the symbolism and thinking for the mother:
I wanted my story to be peaceful, to worship the beautiful face of love.
I have also been a reader of medieval stories. I love and am gripped by anything to do with that era where the world we know today came into being, even though it is conceived as a dark time.
Grateful again for your reading.
Yes, I feel the mother didn't protest when the daughter showed her each of the sprigs because she already knew what they represented. The suitor reaffirmed his intentions each time he gave her daughter one.
Oh yes, falling in love in a forest environment must be a magical feeling! In this case love arrives on a horse! Good prognosis: Annaliesa will surely live a happy life.
Thank you for reading and commenting on the work of your fellow writers, @dwixer!
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I inadvertently sent the Engage token from The Ink Well account instead of my own. :-)
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ENGAGEtokens.