When you were a kid, and was scared to fail in your exams, you decided to study more. You took action based on your fear of failure.
But some among you were able to understand life a little bit more. They chose to study more because they had desires to top their class. They wanted better results, better careers. They were never scared of their failure.
When we don't understand something, chances are that our actions will be based on the fear of failure.
A kid doesn't know how the education works. How it can helps him in his life. He is only scared of failing in exams. He wants to avoid bad grades.
So, he takes enough action to avoid this result. And gets better grades. That's it. The fear of failure in the exam is gone. The motivation to put more effort is gone.
However, some kids were able to understand that better result means better opportunities in the future. It doesn't mean 100% success, but it increases their chances of success.
Every action you take is either because you want something to happen or you want to avoid it.
For example, you work hard because if you don't, you will lose your job. But some people work hard because they find their work meaningful. They want to produce better results.
If you think about it, every action you take is motivated by either fear or desire.
You shop like crazy on discounted products because you fear missing out on cheap products, even if you don't want them.
Or you love a product, and getting it at a discount is what you desired for a long time.
You join gym for the desire of getting in better shape or the fear of gaining more weight.
When you are motivated by fear, you will take action faster, but when you are driven by your desire, you will take stronger actions, and repeat them over a long period of time.
Desire driven actions only gets stronger whereas fear driven actions, gets weaker over time. Because fear driven action creates doubt inside. You don't know whether you want to actually do it or just scared.
Desire intensifies with repetition. For example, the more you go to the gym, the more you want to be fit.
The more you write, the better writer you want to become.
The more you code, the better programmer you want to become.
The more you do something, the more you will want it.
The factor that intensifies both desire and fear is "focus".
Focus is something we take lightly. But we should learn to train our focus. Because if we live a life without focus, our mind will become weak. It will be filled with doubts, fear and negativity.
The mind focus on what we want, what we think about the most. Sad part is that we always focus on the negative aspects of life, the negative outcomes. When we do something, we think about 100 ways it could go wrong, or 100 things we don't want to happen.
Maybe that's why we always make a plan B in case our first plan doesn't work.
How is something going to work if we are already planning our failure, if we are ready with an option in case things go wrong.
There was a story in the book, "Think and Grow Rich".
An army had no chance of winning. The General knew this, so he sailed with his army to the enemy territory. The odds were heavily against him. To win this war, he destoryed all the alternate options except to win. He burned all the boats. There was no option to go back. There was no other way but forward, towards their enemy. Their only choice was either fight and win, or die. As a result, the General won that impossible war.
Sometimes killing our alternate plans help us win the impossible wars.
I am not saying that it is a foolproof plan to achieve our goals. There are times when you will fail no matter what you do.
But if you are 100% focused on something, the chances that you will achieve the results you want increases exponentially.
Focus on the things that will go wrong, and your mind will come up with hundreds of doubts. This is "bad mind training". The more you focus on bad outcomes, the more your imagination expands and the stronger your fear will become. Focusing more on doubt will create more of it.
Therefore, you need to focus on what you want. Be as specific with the results as possible. Always begin with the end in mind.
Focus on your desired results, and your mind will come up with the desired solution.
You will know what you are committed to through your results. We all produce results. But if you are not producing the results you want, you are not committed enough.
Your commitment is a reflection of your desire. If you really want something, then you'll commit to it. You'll be willing to let go of other things. You'll go all in.
An employee who is working to get paid at the end of the month can work only so much. He will produce a limited amount of result. However, an employee who truly believes that he is making a difference through his actions. He is making an impact in the world with his work, will produce high quality work.
Who do you think will create better results? Obviously the person with desire, the second one.
Steve Jobs was never driven by his fears. He was always driven by his desire to achieve extraordinary results in personal computers.
Elon Musk is always driven by his desire to achieve the next breakthrough in space technology.
Fear can only take you so far, make you an average person from being a failure. But desires has no limit. It can make you extraordinary. It can take you to the top of your field.
So, if you are not getting what you want, maybe you don't want it bad enough. Because if you want something bad enough, no matter what, you will achieve it.
When you get extremely committed to what you want, you stop living under the fear and you see everything more clearly.
Combining your focus with your desire will make you confident to achieve anything you put your mind on. It will motivate you to take stronger actions.
But if you are constantly worried about what will go wrong, you will create doubt. You will focus on failure. And you will lose your confidence.
Confidence is something that takes a long time to build, but you can lose it all in one moment of strong self-doubt.