The Nature of the Selfing Process

in OCD3 years ago (edited)

The self is a strange loop

I've been reading a lot about what different people have to say about the meaning of life, making meaning out of life, what is consciousness etc. I keep seeing a theme, whether it is coming from a spiritual, philosophical or often even scientific perspective.

Me, @afturner, Kona and Harvey (around 2013)

This is the idea, or hinting of that what we see as ourselves is not actually a real thing, but an impossible self referencing loop. For instance, when you try to find yourself in your body, you find the mind bouncing around from one feeling to another; at first thinking "this is me!"

Invariably it isn't you, because that sensation utterly vanished (how could that be me? it's gone, but I am still here!), you move onto the next sensation. Ultimately you end up somewhere in your head, perhaps between the eyes somewhere; a bit lower toward the back of the head.

"Ah, this is me."

And then if you concentrate long enough, you notice that this too goes away, but you can clearly still sense that you are there. What is going on here!?

The reason that you can't find yourself and hold it stable is because there is no stable you to be found. You see, this is what I mean by "the self is a process, not a stable permanent thing".

This is a trick that the mind plays. It's a difficult thing to get your head around, but for the sake of simplicity, think of the entire universe as being everything in your immediate experience. sights, smells, thoughts, physical sensations, mental perceptions etc.

Now imagine that there is an attribute to reality that we call mind. The mind aggregates all of the things that exist which we call experience. Each element arising out of nowhere and vanishing just as quickly. The mind continually integrates each new arising of phenomena into the selfing process, while discarding that which has passed away as being irrelevant (no longer me).

Both of my pups have died of old age. This really got me thinking of the impermanent nature of all things.

This is where suffering and misery arise. We believe in this permanent unchanging self as being a thing, instead of a rapidly changing process. We believe this even with powerful evidence to the contrary.

I used to look at all of this stuff as sort of an intellectual, philosophical playing with words with no practical use. It turns out that this is actually what the old wise ones were talking about when they spoke of awakening/enlightenment. It was never meant to be simply some religious ritual, but rather a shift in perception that leads to a very real freedom from mental struggle.

You see, simply by seeing through the cosmic joke, you are freed from the lie that imprisons you. The idea is extremely simple and seems too trivial to matter, but it is the formula to awakening:

All things are changing, the self is just an aggregation of these changing phenomena, no lasting satisfaction can be derived from anything that invariably goes away.

What happens once these things are deeply known, (not just intellectually, but experientially) is that the mind immediately lets go because it realizes that there isn't anything to hold onto.

It's a very simple thing to understand, but takes work to integrate. That is quite literally the entire reason that meditation exists. I've gotten small tastes of this letting go, and I can assure you that it is super real. But I can also tell you that the selfing process is a real son of a bitch, and does not want to give up its power.

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I think I have had this feeling from time to time as well. It kind of reminds me of how I used to feel on Christmas morning. You would be all excited and so into everything and then all the presents were opened and you just kind of sat there and thought well, is this it? It's all over huh, that was kind of a big run up to nothing. Of course the next year you are just as excited again!

Haha, yeah, I know the feeling very well. I think about it every time I get my hands on a giant bowl of ice cream, or something else I love. Nothing ever satisfies in the end as you are always left feeling a bit like something is missing.

It is a weird universe we live in. All I can think is that we're literally just here for the experiences.

Yes for sure. I do that with ice cream too. Gets me every time. I guess on the flip side I detest the thought and action of getting up early every day to work out, but I am always happy I did after the fact.

Good point! I really need to start doing that... This baby has really thrown a spanner in my fitness regime.

I can only imagine. I am about a year and a half into working out five days a week now. My buddy had a heart attack about two years ago and it really got me motivated.

“Spirituality is not to be learned by flight from the world, or by running away from things, or by turning solitary and going apart from the world. Rather, we must learn an inner solitude wherever or with whomsoever we may be. We must learn to penetrate things and find God there.”
― Meister Eckhart

I learned a lot from my father-in-law by simply being with him during a important time in my life. I placed this in a "hidden" corner of my website:

CIRCLE OF THE SUN


*

I will check out the link after feeding the little monster lying on my chest here.

I wish that modern Christians would study the Christian mystics like Eckhart. The religion has really gone astray and lost the plot. I know many Christians who think meditation and introspection are tools of the devil. I have had an actual pastor tell me before that meditation leaves a space open in the body for demons to enter. He clearly didn't understand what real prayer is. When you are listening to God, you are meditating.

I have had an actual pastor tell me before that meditation leaves a space open in the body for demons to enter.

Man, you have some weird people calling themselves "Christians" .... but I know, I lived in the "Bible Belt" in Canada and am very familiar with that kind of thought expressed by so called men of the cloth. The worse part is, they go door to door and teach bible classes, without having a clue themselves.

In the meantime, enjoy this video:

haha, I saw that on TikTok. Pretty funny! That pastor guy is a nut. I don't get how these people have a following. It is so stupid.

they are not stupid - but the people are!

I really need to try to meditate more about everything, see myself from another point of view, separate my mind from my body, that would be really relaxing. Great post and photographs, the place reminds me a lot of my country Uruguay and the city of Punta del Este. All the best!

@@ -252,10 +252,398 @@
low the
+insights already locked inside of us to manifest.%0A%0AThink of the natural state of the mind as purely peaceful and happy. We are not trying to become happy through meditation, we are clearing away the confusion and delusion that is obscuring it. Like a white bottle that is covered with mud. It isn't actually brown with a need to be painted white, it is simply dirty. %0A%0AI am rambling. Hehe
%0A%0A

update: no idea what the heck happened to this comment. Entropy?

hahahah 🤣🤣I think I understood what you mean anyway.
crazy message.

True Words!
I have discovered...
You have to get away from "the laptop on a stick" thing entirely, and see that for what it is as well...
It is a laptop for the soul, not more.
The "real You" does indeed reside elsewhere.
"If You lay down in "Quiet" surroundings...
And "Stop" the internal dialogue completely, and just lay there aware You will find Your Conciousness moves away from the head, to a place much lower in the body.
So like You say...
For most, Conciousness is watching the laptop, watching the world...
Hmm... 🤔😉😊
BTW..
I wanted to mention..
I Love Your App!
Have a Great Upcoming Week!
👍🏼🌄😊🌄👍🏼

Thanks for your wonderful comments, @lessmann!

The "real You" does indeed reside elsewhere.

I think this is why science is never going to solve the hard problem of consciousness. The inherent problem is that science is materialist by nature. We're going to keep trying to figure out how consciousness functions in the body, when the truth of the matter is that matter itself, the body and all of the sensations therein are a product of consciousness itself - not the other way around.

This is a sticky problem for science because its foundation is the movie screen itself rather than the projector.

It's funny huh?
Yesterday I watched a YouTube video about how "the system"
is designed to keep us addicted to the senses, so that that reality is all that You know or think about...
Have You ever read Carlos Castanada?
If not, may I recommend!
All 13 books, the first 3 are a little slow... Mostly background info necessary to understand the rest.
Basically through his "benefactor", Carlos learns about the "Seperate Reality" going on around us..
Very good and very deep stuff, I have been reading and re-reading this since I was 14 (I think 12 actually)..
Interesting, if You want to know what is going on beyond the senses..
😉😊😁
BTW...
That is the "Native American" view...
You can get it "Westernized" from Robert Monroe as well,
And they match...

I have 4 or 5 of the Castenada books. It kind of bummed me out when I learned that he actually made up Juan Matus, but the actual research is true. From what I understand, Matus is sort of a mixture of many different shamans and teachers that he met during his research.

That being said, the content is quite profound and some of it has really stuck with me. I have had some wild experiences that have shaken reality to the core. I also suffer from permanent DP/DR which makes everything seem fake, as if the world is a movie that I am watching through a filter.

One thing that I remember was a scene where Carlos and don Juan were in the desert and Castenada took some plant medicine. He saw a monstrous creature crying out and noticed it had a broken limb. Juan saw it as well, and described the creature. (he wasn't under the influence)

later on when Carlos came down from his high, he realized that the monster was just a plant with a broken branch... or was it?

I am not sure how exactly I am remembering the story, but the gist is the same. This is just another case of reality being totally in our heads. As a race, we create a consensus about what things are, and that is how they appear to us. Certain substances can cause this conditioning to drop off and the filters go away. Same thing happens with adept meditators!

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