The Phantom

in BDCommunity3 years ago

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It was no understatement to say I knew not what had happened to me. The air still hasn’t cleared. It was hazy and it seemed that all color had dimmed but I could see. Maybe it was partial, or maybe I saw nothing but at least thought I did.

The whirlwinds too. They caused the whole town to panic.

Maybe this is the end of the world, they murmured loudly amongst themselves.

I knew not if they were real, or maybe they were just voices in my head, maybe rehabilitation would’ve genuinely helped if I had just seek the help I needed right when I needed it. It was still so fresh on my mind what had transpired 14hours before the crash. I had just been dismissed from office on medical grounds. My employer said I was no longer fit to perform at maximum, and that I was starting to become a liability, not just to the company but myself also.

Leaving my office desk to never again return wasn’t easy. I had grown accustomed to it because it served me memories of pain and laughter- when my own conscious mind wouldn’t allow such.

I felt empty. Deep down I had warred my mind to a last-stretch state until totally worn and incapable of letting out the negative vibes and the auras of stress that however lingered for eternity. I had witnessed the colorless ocean water of remorse, and with no inner voice to keep me in check, dived in.

Swollen eyeballs could tell the tale of the burst bank of tear drops. Maybe I was headed home before it happened. The accident. The very loud crash. The burning pain in my neck. My head-on collision with a truck.

What surprised me was that for a minute, I felt my soul and spirit leave me. It wasn’t part of the plan. My plan- I wouldn’t die until I’ve thrashed it out, but thoroughly with my found purpose. I did come to terms with a lot, few hours just before the accident. I made some decisions that would have bested the life I was living, but veil wouldn’t let me.

Memories can be a tricky thing. Some part of mine seemed to have wiped- clean slate, and some memories I never thought I had were coursing through me.

Me, a phantom?

Well, I wouldn’t rule anything out just yet.

Then…a new page flipped, and once again they were all burning- the asphalt, the stretcher, the body bag, even clothing of the few medics nearby. The scene seemed to get played out when it seems to have just started, like someone is applying the rewind and fast-forward effect. It can’t be real.

But…

Then again, it seemed kind of new- Thinking without brains and laughing without throat. I badly needed to see light. I needed Knowledge. I needed to see, but my rights to explore reality was once again denied me.

OK OK Calm down. Deep Breaths. This started another bout of whirlwinds.

I’ve been thinking…

What if the accident, in fact never occurred?

What if it was only in the minds?

What if all was a product of an unstable mind? One that had just experienced a complete melt-down. At least, that seemed more plausible to me than the whirlwinds, the phantom, body-bags etc. But again, it was so clear to me that I don’t think with my brain, at least not anymore- I don’t have one.

But why the fragments?

I suddenly jerk awake…

I had a seizure. The accident had been real all along. I had earlier on swerve off the road in a head-on collision with a truck. I was in a very bad shape, my head hurts and I could barely feel my legs.

My convulsed head had really done a lot. It really messed up my memory, but I know it will take a while before it gets better.

I had thought the worst part of the hellish nightmare was over.

Could hear the ambulance siren blare in the distance as I was been ferried to the hospital to get treated. Then I slid back into the dark…

Again I felt a change in the pace around me- I was like the center of a small whirlwind, scraps and plastic were flying up and around.

OK OK Calm down. Deep Breaths. This started another bout of whirlwinds.

And it again took me a while to realize that all were just fantasies that only existed in my mind.

The End!