I witnessed a shooting.

The crows gather a few blocks away
scream funerary screams
I run to see
stare up into the bare branches of a sunset tree fruited with grieving crows
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I look for a body
I don't see a body

CRACK

a sound resonates from the house with the yard with tree of grieving crows
they take to the air
the crows
circle and yell and come back for the funeral
I still can't see the body
I round the corner for a better view

CRACK

that sound again
a tiny explosion
what is it?

and then

the bird
the body
the fall
the limp wings
the lifeless plummet to the earth below
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my screams of rage
first reaction
I run toward the yard where the crow fell

stop

I can't
someone has a gun

I run toward the door of the house where I heard the sound

stop

I can't
someone has a gun

I have to protect the crows

clap!
yell!
FLY AWAY

they continue to scream
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no
stop yelling
look up

repeat the image of the falling crow with a message of death in my mind

they hear me
they leave
all of them
at once.
...

I am numb.

...

Why can't I feel?

the falling body
the falling body
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the calm and tranquil mind

It is illegal to kill crows

I call the police
second reaction
the calm and tranquil mind speaks
with prizewinning influence
but they've never had a call like this before
I didn't see who did it
they'll see what they can do
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my legs carry me up the hill
my arms carry a little dog
whose neck carries my wet hot sobs
the third reaction
I am so weak
I want to go back
collect the bodies

can't walk
can't make it home
can't make it home

I find the park
find a dark corner
the searing sword of devastation cuts into my throat
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I sway and whimper
gasp and moan

someone's child

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someone's partner

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someone's parent

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someone's friend

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strength finds me
and brings me home
home to my bed of snot choke scream writhe powerless helpless grief

...
the crow falls
over and over
forever
...


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Lorena


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Bo


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Junior


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Lod


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Baby Biggie


This really happened. All of it.

This is my fourth reaction.
This is my pain.
This shouldn't have happened.
But it did.
And you need to know.


Everything in this post and (and all of my other posts) is mine (unless otherwise stated) and can't be used by anyone else unless I say it's ok.

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What a desperate and helpless situation..... The scene is really sad and heartbreaking and the images as siemencantadoras.... Your crows are adorable...! A Big @corvidae.

Thank you thank you thank you for your sweet words and for reading.🖤

I read this last night. I had to sit with it for a while. The way you wrote it brought me right there in those moments. Horrible. I woke up with this in my mind this morning.

Absolutely stunning photos. I just gave up trying to photograph birds seeing these. That sunset in the first one, the colours are unreal.

Beautiful post, sending 🤗💖

Thank you🖤💙
You should never give up on something based on how you compare yourself to another's work, but I absolutely appreciate the meaning behind that statement. I worked on these photos that night, after it happened, and after I talked with my crow sisters about it. Making the images of my closest crow friends as beautiful as possible made me feel like I was protecting them. The only way I could feel less helpless. Writing and sharing the experience also made me feel less helpless. Maybe it will have an influence over how someone sees a crow or any other living thing, knowing how interconnected we all are... or something like that. For the handful of people that read it.
I'm sorry to drag you into the experience with me, but also glad to know that my composition was effective. Thank you so so much for reading.

You should never give up on something based on how you compare yourself to another's work, but I absolutely appreciate the meaning behind that statement.

I agree. I'd say it's living in the city that's discouraged me more than anything. It's very difficult to get shots of birds here, or at least the ones I want to...like the hawks and cardinals. Part of it is that I don't carry a cell phone, so I miss many opportune shots.

Very effective composition. Btw, I'm quite happy being dragged into the experience. I'm more than comfortable with that. I'm sure, those who are open will experience this deeply. You never know who you touch with what you create, often they are silent.

I'd say you're manifesting that protection and using what you experienced, transmuting that to do so. That is the creative soul, when one can do that sort of thing. I'm not wording this the best here, but I think you get what I'm saying.

Always a pleasure to read and the photos 💖

Worded just fine! I'm glad to know you understand my digital witchery.

I live in the city, too, but it's Portland and we love our trees and "certified backyard habitats" so that makes birding easier, I'm sure. That and the generally mild PNW climate.

You never know who you touch with what you create, often they are silent.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I like that, "digital witchery" and yeah, I get it.

I think you're most likely better situated than I am here

Jeeeeeeeeezusssss is that an iron forest?? You are very brave to live in so much city. I almost moved to Seattle when I made the decision to escape to the Pacific Northwest. Fortunately it was too expensive. It's a nice city, but Portland really does have the urban nature thing down. We even have wild humans... that's actually not meant to be funny. We have a huge population of mentally ill homeless, in part because (from what I've been told), our city is the most tolerant and the homeless "emigrate" here. Also in part because we can't/don't care to figure out a real solution. I am just as guilty of this as the next person, but am still kind to those who are kind to me, and avoid those who are threatening.

Well, that was almost a tangent. Good thing I stopped myself.

😂There's probably more plastic and glass involved these days, but I laughed when I read "iron forest"...great visual there! (around 14 million here, sigh). Definitely, you have the better location.

Interesting how homeless "emigrate" to Portland. There are a lot here, always has been and it keeps getting worse. Smart approach in how you handle them. That's the same that I do here. Size them up beforehand. I often talk to those on the street when I'm out and about, but avoid those where I get that read to not go near. I've had some great conversations and learned some things.

Not a thing wrong with tangents. A friend who does this (I do too) calls it tangential thinking. 😁

Such an amazing collection of photos and powerful heart felt words.

Thank you so much for reading. 🖤

You captured the feelings most of us would have experienced had we been in your shoes that day. A sad and outrageous incident.

Live and let live, I say.

Thank you for sharing your prose.

Cheers!

Thank you for reading.🖤

Whaaaaaaaat????? Bastards! Karma is gonna get them!

Sorry about the crow 😔

Thank you. Karma will get them baaaaaad. Of course, if they're shooting defenseless intelligent beings, karma is probably already getting them and that's why they're such a psychopathic monster. Still, let's make it exponential karma.

I love crows and have often used them in my artwork, these are wonderful shots and these amazing birds @corvidae and who doesn't love that a flock of them is called a murder?

Photos and story are great as always!

Thank you.🖤

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