The road back to a healthy masculinity

in #life3 years ago (edited)

This topic has a bit of a controversial edge to it, so upfront I want you to know that my intentions behind bringing it up, are only ones of assisting healing and emotional prosperity, rather than conflict and more chaos.

What does it mean to be a man?

In society, what I can observe, especially in urban areas, is that the line between men and women in terms of their behavior (if we want to categorize it into feminine and masculine) is starting to disappear.

A lot of young men I see have become very feminine in their behavior. There appears to be a lack of being connected to that raw primal and determined power, that we know men can radiate.

Now I want to make clear right now, that in my opinion, it is of utmost importance for a man to get in contact with his feminine part, and to learn how to feel and process emotion. But that must not be, at the cost of being completely cut off from the true essence of masculinity!

On the other hand, there is the type of men, who are completely overacting what they think or learn is masculine, which appears quite obvious as a covering up of the fear of their deeper self and the possibility of a public rejection of those parts. It all comes down, to which environment people grow up.

Now the thing is, because this false masculinity has become so loud, and done so much damage, people have come to believe that that's the real thing! So they try to ban masculinity from our society. This is where we come full circle, and we can see how the other group of more feminized men has come into being. We are being taught as men today that our raw and more dangerous side is wrong. We are cutting him off from his primal self.

For the last year, we have seen lots of confused rants and discussions on the mainstream social media platforms about the gender debate.

And in these times its important, to tread very carefully in which direction we continue, after the exposure of our wounds, as there is potential to create an even deeper dilemma.


Men need healing and not castration.

The public shaming of masculine behavior in men won't be leading to any positive outcome! Masculinity is not a problem, it's rather the case that often men's relation to their own masculine is deeply disturbed and traumatized. If all behavior and emotion that is linked to the masculine, will be shamed and pushed in the shadow of society, we will end up with a herd of men, that constantly suppresses some of their deepest instincts and intuitions!

Things in the shadow don't heal, they start to mold!

A healthy man can acknowledge and embody his masculinity, without acting out his pain and trauma in primitive and pathological herd behavior. The primal energy I have been talking about can be channeled into something beautiful and radiant, but incredibly powerful! Which is why it might in this form still be viewed as a threat to some.
The solution cant is, to just create a homogenized mono-culture of gender-less behavior.

Yes, a lot of masculine behavior now and in the last centuries has been cancerous, but let's try to understand what is healthy masculinity, and start to cultivate it instead of banning it altogether.

Masculine and Feminine represent two different parts of a whole, but we need our polar synergies for a healthy culture and relationships!


" learn how to feel and process emotion. But that must not be, at the cost of being completely cut of from the true essence of masculinity!"

This line is beautiful, beautiful and beautiful.

At heart I am a beast or more accurately a part of my heart is a human and part of it is beast. I will never be free if I cannot let the beast ride along with the human. But I know know for a fact when they ride together it is the human that would ride the beast.

To me that is my manhood. The animal within me will live free but I will leash it when I choose to let it out. This world has too many people whom I care for to let them get hurt. To me manhood is not about dominating others but to rise above it and channel it back within myself.

"........Things in the shadow don't heal, they start to mold!"

Once again, beautifully said.

The world needs to see what's within a man by not looking at the man but by looking inside itself. This is how a what's within me can truly be seen.

So glad that @sean-king resteemed this post in my feed. Even happier that you wrote it. Thanks both of you!

Thanks for commenting. I wholeheartedly agree, about the duality of beast and human in our hearts/earthly core. When we acknowledge the beastly part with awareness, it transforms and shines a light through our presence. It is an essential part of natures polarity. But like you already said, nothing to add ***

You have to come to the realization there are evil people that love human suffering. There is an agenda to break everyone into different divisions and pit us against each other. We must root ourselves in the natural order and embrace ourselves. Men should embrace their masculinity and women should embrace their femininity. This will restore balance. Both the true nature of the sacred masculine and feminine in balance is harmony. We are out of balance, we have to realize this natural order to move in a better direction imo. Strong men, strong women, strong families, powerful people able to rule themselves.

🙏 you said it.
Self responsibility (self rule) for your actions and state of being is so important. Your probably right about the division that is trying to be created(chaos in general), but I try to not give away to much energy into these thoughts, as thats just what they might want. Anyway one has to realize that the norms and conventions dont make any sense what so, and are out there to weaken us and take away our power that comes from essence of who we really are as men and women

@innerspace I agree wholeheartedly.
There has been a demonization of the masculine of late. It’s crazy, reactionary and tragic. Let me post more mañana, but know...I see it this way as well.


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There's nothing I love more than being in the presence of sacred masculine energy. I feel so safe and wonderful.