An Exciting Thing

in #life4 years ago

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Hey, darling. How about we do something exciting today?

The Good Lady husked at me as if she was on her second week of COVID.

Deep in the dark woody undergrowth of my nethers, my Whomping Willow, twitched slightly as if scenting fresh meat.

Something exciting...?

I questioned with a raised eyebrow in an attempt to resemble a seventies James Bond.

The Good Lady stood in the doorframe between the kitchen and the lounge and stretched at me seductively.

I looked around for the kids. They were nowhere to be seen but I could hear crashing noises and screaming from upstairs.

All ok on that front then.

Slowly I raised myself from the chair, it had been a while since I had shagged my knee in the mysterious becoming an old man injury. It was mostly better. In fact, it was probably fit enough to withstand some standy-kitchen-doorway action.

Was that what was on offer?

Should I get my boaby out and approach the Good Lady in that most romantic of man-ways with my lad in my hand?

The Good Lady gazed at me as I approached, tilting her head back slightly so I could see right up her nostrils.

Perhaps I should blow up them before spitting on my hand and slapping her rump as if she were a fine filly in a stable full of clean hay.

Something a bit different.

She murmured as I closed the distance between us.

I nodded. Something a bit different, eh?

Perhaps I should offer her some hamburger

It never failed. Even when it did.

My gun hand moved across my body, ready to unholster as I drew level with my lovely lady-wife.

The Good Lady wet her lips, the tip of her tongue resembling a budgie's penis and put a hand firmly on the centre of my chest stopping me in my tracks.

Are you game?

She murmured softly like an insurance salesman describing the small print as you signed.

Rrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhgh.

I purred with handsome panache.

Darling. Daddy says yes! Bring it down!

The Good Lady yodelled over my shoulder.

Huh?

I blinked confusedly like a Flat Earther looking at the horizon out the window of a plane at 38000 feet.

Harry Potter Lego! We have a new piece of Hogwarts to assemble. Won't it be fun!

The Good Lady skipped past me into the room where the Little Lady had bounded in with a cardboard box full of random and expensive bits of plastic.

Something inside me whined like a dog reminiscing over the testicles he once had.

Yeah, amazing.

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Lol...You had me worked up and then...Lego!

Still, you know I like me some Lego so I maintained a good level of excitement...Now just need to work out what to do with it!

When you get it done do a post for the Lego Community mate.

The budgie penis and flat-earther lines...Gold.

Hehe, aye. It looks like a worthy thing this one, half a wall of Hogwarts. The price of the rest of it is making me faint!

Bless them flat earthers! :0D

!ENGAGE 30

Yeah, bloody Lego is costly. I love it though. I am considering doing the Hogwarts thing.

The whole thing looks awesome and is a build and a half! That diagon alley the other day looked awesome too

One day...When I have some money and can afford to buy it. That's code for probably never. Lol.

You never know! The thing I have found is having the room to have them on display as it were. It starts to mount up!

Yep, I have them all over the place...Top of my piano etc. That's the problem. It won't be long and I'll send one of the bigger ones to Taraz for him and smallsteps...Just waiting until she's a bit older. I'll start to get rid of some to make room...

...For more.

🤣

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Oh, my!!! I just reposted this onto my page, which I do, unless, of course, it is riske! I wonder if my friends will think I am pervy or if it will bring a string of women over here to look at your legos?

Time will tell. Keep those legos tidy.

Upped and reposted

!tip

HAhaha! Surely they will only envy the beauty in the thumbnail and ask where they can get a fox fur stole like that!

My legos are impeccable at all times :OD

I can only say that piece of fleece called out to me as I scrolled on by. You just cannot acquire a stole like that anymore. It renders you timeless.

I am happy to hear about your legos being in proper order. I wouldn't want to catch you with your legos gone astray.

!tip

One must always take care of one's legos. It's the Gentleman's code!

Ah, the golden days of stoles and canes. Brings a tear to my eye! :OD

I quite agree!! You never know when you might need them! Days of yore.... who knew they would be so missed.

On a higher note, I didn't get coffee and it wasn't served to me. I need better maid service in this place.

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It never failed. Even when it did.

Bahahahahahhahahahaaaa XD this seems somewhat contradictory XP

Hehe, I know. Somehow it entertained me chewing the phrase in my head!! :0D

Lego, a constant reminder why not to walk bare footed.

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The modern day caltrops!

😄

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Hahahahahhahahahhahah awesome! I bet you jumped in joy😂😂😂

Almost... hahahahah!

Such is life, Boom. The women folk just never know how good they got it with such virile men around. I mean who else is going to open stuck lids or hold their purses while they shop?!?

No one!! Without them purses being held they are helpless!!! ;0)

The power of a women.....

Is an amazing thing!! :OD

Hello dear friend @meesterboom good night
That is what I admire about women, they know how to manipulate us, a puzzle game is never bad for a fun afternoon.
Have a wonderful afternoon and a happy start to the week

The start of the week is never good but thank you jlufer!!!

Yes, she wears me like a glove at times!! :0D

That is a very good strategy dear friend @meesterboom you always get more things than you want with that position.
You're right, the weeks should start one day later

A Tuesday to Friday week would suit me just fine!!

Bless you, don't worry it doesn't last forever, just until your little ones decide to move out, if they ever do haha

Only another 14 plus years to go!!! Yeek!

Just cross your legs and pray LOL

Ha ha ha ha the good lady was thinking about something very different from you ha ha ha, don't give up, wait and at night it will be your chance, don't stay like this ha ha ha.
Happy Sunday

I do seem to get the wrong end of the stick quite a lot of the time! I shall never give up!!!

I thought it was a rich Twitter embed?

image.png

It is.

That's totally weird, it wasn't earlier!

It can take a second to load. When you first load a page, they look like text, then load in over the next few seconds. Usually by the time you get to the comment section they are loaded, but if you go directly to a comment it may take a second.

It usually all happens within a second.

Damn, I'm fast :0)

I shall be more patient in future, cheers for letting me know!

awww, damn...you had to lego your prego :( Oh, well, she owes you one now LOL I like the idea of a #sundaystiffy tag lol.

I wonder if #sundaystiffy might catch on!! I dread to think. Lolz!!

My name is Bond, James Bond :)

I wish!

I think we all wish!!!! :0D

I like two on either end: Sean and Daniel

When is the new one out again? Damn! Its been too long!

Those are my favourites actually. Sean, possibly because of the Scottish connection but he was a great bond and Daniel has totally remade the role. He might be my favourite overall!

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