Still...

[rok-sivante]

Comments

[jacobtothe]

A family member is struggling with letting go of a toxic relationship. It's incredibly easy for me to say, "just cut all contact. It'll hurt, but you'll survive. Acknowledge the feelings, but don't let them control you." It's doubtless a lot harder to do it, like kicking a tobacco or alcohol habit.

[rok-sivante]

yep.

and I dunno if it's really something we can ever actually tell anyone else what to do, as everybody's gotta go through their own timing and make those calls themselves.

and sometimes coming to those realizations entails sticking your finger in the socket more times than humanly sane. lol. it took a long while to finally ween off communications with her - as much as I wanted to keep the good parts alive, perhaps it really needed to burn for the reality to sink in that trying was doing more damage than good, only to end up back in the same loops, and that the Pandora's box was never worth it. not loving to either of us.

toughest shit I've ever been through, man. immensely deep love, but sometimes there's just something in the dynamic that's toxic. neither person good/bad, right/wrong - just not a vibrational match.

surely tough to watch others you care about go through it too, it being obvious as an observer. perhaps best thing ya can do is just offer the non-judgemental support, listening when needed, allowing them the space to go through their own process. eventually, the change will occur when the timing is right for them. 🙏

[nancybriti]

I recognize myself in the situation you describe. I just ended a relationship of many years and I feel that something is dying in me. Surely my youth, my desire to start a new romance, the idea of starting new projects. At this moment I feel that my expectations have grown and not just anyone can occupy the space that love has made in me. As we grow up we realize that love is not about putting initials on a tree, but about commitment, about looking at the horizon and between the two of us saying: let's go there together. Spring will return, the poem said, and I hope so. hugs, @rok-sivante

[rok-sivante]

weird mix of feelings, reading that...

on one hand, I can relate... though then again, maybe not as it's surely gotta be different as a woman, in a completely different life situation.

on another hand, part of me wants to offer some sort of condolences, knowing how tough it can be - yet also knowing that no words can ever really do justice and these may be these types of trials that we each have to go through alone at some point.

on another mysterious third hand, I feel privileged to have been able to offer these reflections (in the post) which you may see parts of your situation, being able to relate and maybe feel like someone gets where you're at (to some degree).

and perhaps there's no need for hope, as the poet is correct to point out the obvious: the seasons always do carry on in their cycles, spring inevitably to return. granted, it may look different as we've aged and journeyed to a different place... though perhaps that's all the more reason to surrender with a wonder & curiosity of what new we may see and experience in this new place from a new vantage point. 🤷‍♂️

🙏💖

[curie]

Hi rok-sivante,

This post has been upvoted by the Curie community curation project and associated vote trail as exceptional content (human curated and reviewed). Have a great day :)

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