Is Social Media RUNNING My Life??

in #lifestyle7 months ago

Good Day Fam,

I just want to make a disclaimer NOW ... this will be long! so grab that glass of wine, coffee, snacks and eyeballs!

I am a busy stay at home mom, who tends to do the same old thing ...
every.
single.
day.
don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with that... until you realize why you're so depressed about it.

I spend A LOT of time on my phone, as i think a lot of people do. A couple weeks ago, I checked just how much time I was spending on my phone and I was honestly... shocked and disgusted with myself! I grew up in a time where cell phones WERE NOT a thing, until I got to high school and still, it was a flip phone with t9 and no internet. Bottom line, I spend way to much time on social media!

For the past 10 years, I think society KNOWS they spend to much time on their phones, or social media in general, but sometimes it could take that amount of time for it to mentally start affecting your entire life! Today I am going to mostly focus on my experience and how it has affected me. Maybe others feel the same way, and can relate, which is something i think is important and helpful in many ways.

I normally wake up, and instantly check my phone, which i have no problem with now that i am thinking about it, but check it, and then checking out is what is important. I tend to spend a LOT of time, doing absolutely NOTHING on social media. especially Facebook.

Facebook is soooooo toxic. As you may know, I have a YouTube channel, that I have become pretty passionate about. I have grown from the time i started making videos to now. In the long run, Facebook wont give me money in terms of me posting/advertising on my own, unless i pay them of course. I feel trapped on Facebook, because I don't get anything from it. Even the people on my Facebook ... don't care. No one likes my stuff, shares it or even clicks on it...
SO WHY THE FUCK AM I SPENDING SO MUCH TIME ON IT???
why should i post about my passions, my life and my family for random people i went to high school with or family that doesn't talk to you outside of Facebook. I don't want it.
Facebook = GONE!
I have fully decided to delete Facebook. Not only is it toxic to my health, my life, my family's life and my productivity, it's toxic to support a company that is so purely fucked in all its terms and conditions. Good Riddance, Good bye.

The second most used social media I indulge in ... is Instagram. YES YES, i know, Instagram is owned by Facebook ... BUT ITS NOT AS BAD! but it is also extremely toxic, and i think if you have an active Instagram account and use it daily, you know exactly what i am talking about.
On Facebook, i was endlessly scrolling and posting for nothing, on Instagram i DO NOT scroll and I post all day. On stories, on my feed. Sure, its invigorating when you get 100+ likes on a feed post, & people engaging, and making a little community for yourself. But, have you ever noticed people "dissapearing" from Instagram, or constantly saying "i need a mental health break" its because Instagram has pushed these people, including myself, to a point of getting NOTHING in return for putting SO MUCH effort into posting and making people who know nothing about you happy, when you're still depressed.

Instagram stories. Similar to snap chat, which i got rid of over 2 years ago. I have been going hard on the Instagram stories for about a year now. I have learned that if you do not post every day, at least 20-30 times a day, and using all of their engagement tools you will be shadow banned. You can see how many people view your story, but when your going hard for 2 weeks, you see those numbers go up, you stop for a week, and those numbers get cut in half, MORE then half, when you start posting again.

why should I be punished, for something that I'm trying to do for myself?
why should i be punished, for something that is supposed to make me happy?

Not only do you have to be active basically all day every day, you need to engage in all the posts that the people you follow post. By liking, commenting and now the new one, saving their posts and if you don't, shadow banned. This is really hard, when you are trying to use a platform such as Instagram, the way that I am trying to use it. Make a community, bring that community to my YouTube & Build a LARGE community all over.

Listen, If you have over 10k followers on Instagram, you're good to go. I believe at that point, Instagram will benefit you in terms of "payments" but do you know how hard it is to get 10k followers... when your just a small town girl livin in a lonely world?

Instagram reminds me of Blackberry.
do you know anyone who still has a Blackberry as a PERSONAL device? or only business men or women? Blackberry is a device i feel, geared towards business people. This is how I view Instagram. If you have a different platform, such as YouTube, and have a very large following on that platform, then it will be easy for you to get those people, over to your Instagram, because they already like you, they already like your content, so now they want more.
do you get what i am trying to say?

"when your lost, when your scared, when your broke beyond repair, you can lean on me"
"when your sad and insecure, & you cant take it anymore, you can lean on me"

With all this harsh talk about Instagram, I will not be deleting my Instagram. I enjoy the people who have followed me, who have engaged with all my posts, and who have supported me along the way, but i will be limiting my time on Instagram. The mornings, The afternoons, & once before bed. 3 times a day. I can't go hard anymore... & I'll tell you why...

My life is crumbling.
everything around me is crumbling.
I'm trying to hard for people who don't give a fuck about me.
my life is crumbling.

Like I mentioned, YouTube is the future. YouTube is the future, past and present & I will continue my journey over there FULLY. I will take that time i WASTED on Instagram & Facebook ... and invest my time in making my content on YouTube BETTER. Better editing, better filming, more patience, more time involved, because in the long run, YouTube is whats going to pay my bills faster then any other social media platform.
No, I am not on YouTube because I want to ONE DAY get paid, sure... it sure as hell would be nice, but until then ... I still enjoy all the aspects of making videos. Like i said, it has become a pure passion of mine.

I need to connect with myself and my family more. My REAL family. We have become distant, maybe its the pandemic, but i think we need to stop blaming everything on the pandemic. I got to this point, because I let it. That's not happening anymore. I will be focusing more on my life, my home, my family, my health, my family's health and the friends that actually stick with me during all this. Because were missing out on human connections, social media is to blame.

If this helped you, in any way. please let me know! These are all my opinions, what is going to work for me! follow me if you are interested in posts after this one regarding how my plans have changed and how i am doing!

Things will get better, sometimes you need other people in your life to tell you what to do, to guide you in a better path and to make you realize your so much more then just a username on a social media platform.

Xoxo,
MM