In times gone by, we used to read fiction to explore imaginary realities. Now we live in a reality so bizarre even Philip K Dick probably would have needed to up his drug intake to deal with it...
“They live in tiny spaceships which they insert into their subjects anal passages. From deep within human anuses they emit their instructions, which their followers hear as a voice in their anus telling them what to do. These people are known as the Martian Anal Division (MAD).
One of the key symptoms of people who are controlled by Martians up their arses is that they not only want to do what the Martians tell them to, but that they also want to force everyone else to do it as well. They often revert to the phrase “for the greater good”, and want to bring in “laws” in the hope that they can force other people to “conform” to the wishes of the voices in their arses.
In an attempt to get a better handle on controlling the non-MAD population, they introduce social engineering such as water fluoridation (make the population sick and obedient), vaccinations (make them sick and infertile), fear of “terrorism” (submit to more laws and surveillance), fear of viruses and other various “global apocalypses” (submit to more restrictions and taxes), and wars (the ultimate control system)
They also direct everyone with an anal implant to watch more TV, where they can obsess over misinformation called “news”, listen to angry black men making guttural rhyming noises about hoes, yos, and bros, become jealous over the size of the breast implants of women who sing the things that the voices in their arses are saying, and enjoy watching stocky men in tight shorts battling each other over leather balls.
Luckily, for all their cunning, the Martians have some serious flaws in their evil plan. When they insert their micro spacecraft into their victim’s anal passages, it tends to block their elimination of waste matter. So their victims slowly fill up with shit.
Already pressurized to bursting point, when they are confronted by people who refuse to conform, they start to turn purple and run around in circles making squawking noises like a chicken having an epileptic fit. Sometimes the backed up gasses start to escape from their arse like a loud rumbling fart, while sometimes they just blow up like an American false flag terrorists bomb”
This was originally posted on Steemit back in October 2016:
https://steemit.com/humor/@sift666/the-martian-anal-division
I would upvote it, but there's no point...You selfish bastard, taking away my upvoting joy..
I wrote this four years ago and posted it on steemit...accurate wasn't it?
lol - really? I thought you were using my recent posts...lol
You wish - but really I sowed the seeds for your mental revolution long ago!
Just don't call me a narcissist...
ah, a psi -op!!lol....I feel abused, and not in a nice way..
I absolutely loved this @sift666!! Thanks for the laugh and so freaking relevant today!! 🤣 I just wish I could upvote!!
I took the rewards off this account so I can let rip without being blacklisted on my main @frot account.
I had a bit of history on Steemit, and just want to repost stuff without looking like I'm trying to milk the system. This post was originally on Steemit here:
https://steemit.com/humor/@sift666/the-martian-anal-division
No wonder I hadn't taken a descent shit in years.. over due for a colonoscopy ....
Keep looking Doc the Martians are in there somewhere ...