I parked Where Waycross meets Big Tyler
And started to jog
I used to use this same sidewalk to stumble inside more than a few of the neighboring houses with dirt on my shirt
and the only wrong things in my pockets.
Now I jog
And then the thoughts being to trickle in
I woke up 37 minutes late.
I slept in 37 minutes because life sucked.
So I let 37 minutes of my life go because life sucks.
It makes no sense but I did just that.
An Irrational reaction to a problem with a simple response... None
But I still got up.
That is better.
That is a man worth saving.
That is a father worth a kiss good night.
That is a boy who has grown into a man of progression.
Tomorrow I hope to keep my 37 minutes.
Because It's mine.
And now,
like yesterday,
I already know life sucks.
But I don't have too.
...I pass the the building where the old seven-eleven used to be.
I used to buy Hurricane 40’s and 99 cent cigarillos to split, gut, and not smoke nicotine.
“I stroll where I used to roll,” I think, “How comically ironic.”
My brothers and I used to try and solve problems with chemicals, brew, and herbs.
he same problems I am currently solving now with a decision, rather than a side effect of maladapted coping mechanisms.
How progressively ironic.
...I turn around 1.5 miles in at Andrew Jackson Middle School. Were at eleven I discovered that I knew nothing while simultaneously pretending I knew it all.
Silent, I move, in the same parking lot that I used to reluctantly leave equipped with a long pink disciplinary slip and a conscious full of regret.
For not being silent.
How comically ironic.
But Okay.
Because now I'm Okay.
And silent.
The Hills in Cross lanes give me moments of strain and periods of relative rest if compared to themselves.
Ups and downs I guess,
is the way I could explain it best.
Like my life
and it's Ups
And it's Downs.
That are all okay
and ultimately welcomed
because they define one another.
They give life to their opposite
As Alan Watts has taught me.
...In the end I am back where I started.
Where Waycross meets Big Tyler
The same church that as a kid I would drunkenly wait for her to give me the Que to sneak into her window.
Now I just get into my car and head to my family.
My world.
A perfect partner
And a beautiful little girl.
So I woke up 37 minutes late.
Because of the same life that after a short jog makes me feel overwhelmed with gratitude and blessings.
The change in my perspective
The change in my mental direction
came from a mental decision to make a physical response.
A decision to try.
A decision to take the opportunity of life
To take the opportunity of another breath
that was gracefully gifted to me.
Not owed to me as a debt to me.
But given as a grant of spiritual sorts.
I make a decision to strive rather than just survive
Because every minute is worth a breath.
And every breathe is worth a step.
-L33
R.I.P Supremo (Chris) Christian Jr.
R.I.P Christian Stanley
R.I.P Jesse Lewis
Inspired by Charles Bukowski
Oh my goodness this is really beautiful. Genuine, heartfelt, inspiring. Excellent work. Watts and Bukowski too! Thank you.
Thanks!!! I haven't check profile in a couple days and I just seen this. It was a creation from the heart and to have someone appreciate and thank me for me is amazingly satisfying. It motivates and inspires me, Thank you!!
The pleasure was mine! Looking forward to more.
Memories 🕰
Your brother would be proud of how far you’ve come!
I know I am.