Officially Unofficial WHO Covid-1984 Update - December 29, 2021 (SATIRE)

in #satire2 years ago

Who-logo.jpg

Due to increased fear of the flu, countries that start with the letters “N”, “Y”, or “E” will not allow gatherings of 6 or more people on New Year’s Eve, December 31, 2021.

Countries that start with the letters “N”, “Y”, or “D” will not allow gatherings of 6 or more people on New Year’s Day, January 1, 2022. While The WHO realizes that this may be viewed as unfair by tax slaves residing in countries that start with the letters “N” or “Y”, it doesn’t really matter because we’re the self-anointed experts, so you all can stuff it.

It has been found that people with sodium chloride in their bodies are more susceptible to various unnamed and uninvented strains of Covid-1984. In light of this, The WHO is pleased to announce that Jerck Pharmaceuticals is developing an anti-sodium-chloride shot that will be rushed to poor people worldwide. The first one million volunteers for this shot will get a 10 dollar credit from GoogAppleZon, and a gold star!

Due to recent mask and muzzle shortages, WHO recommends obstructing breathing with coffee filters. Also, if extra protection from bad, life giving air is desired, a plastic shopping bag may be tied extra snug around the head. This method is highly recommended by Bill Gates and Planned Parenthood.

A recent study suggests that Covid-1984 may or may not spread through contact with the eyes. If this is true, The WHO recommends wearing at least one eye patch at all times, and two eye patches while operating heavy machinery.

END UPDATE

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WHO recommends obstructing breathing with coffee filters

LOL, it may be satire, but if there were a mask shortage, I could totally see them recommending this.

Thanks @ironshield

Yeah, it wouldn't surprise me if that would actually happen

that was good fun hehe.

you can use #deepdives for posts like this

Thanks for that, @informationwar

When I do another similar post I'll use #deepdives

My freedom comes from my creator, not the tyrannical government. It is time to wake up before the satire becomes reality and the new normal. What will it take to un-brainwash the masses?

Haha! Officially tickled. Seems time is running out for satire though, being that reality is much more absurd 🤪

LOL. Yep, @article61, the days of satire are definitely numbered. Society is getting far too absurd.

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