The worst kind of passengers

in #travelfeed2 years ago

This is all kind of a moot point at the moment since for most of us, travel is still not an option thanks to that deadly virus that has a 99.5% survival rate but there was a time, if you can remember back that far, that we were allowed to come and go as we pleased. I have flown all over the world and there have been some good flights and some absolutely awful flights. I don't believe there is such a thing as a "great flight" but that probably has a lot to do with the fact that I can not afford business or first class tickets and have been relegated, probably forever, to sit in steerage.

Here is my list of the most annoying type of airplane passengers that I believe exist.

The giant


I've been in the situation where a person is walking down the aisle heading to his or her seat and been secretly praying "please don't be sitting next to me, please don't be sitting next to me" and thankfully, this has always gone well for me except once. If you are awesomely fat I am sure the situation is no more pleasant for you than it is for the people that you have to sit with and I do feel a bit of sympathy for the fact that you are triple the size that a healthy person probably should be but honestly, unless you have some sort of glandular medical issue you kind of did that to yourself and I don't have a great deal of sympathy for ya.

Seats are small enough already and when you introduce a person into the mix that can not possibly fit into one seat you are going to spill over into mine. By the way the above picture was taken from an article where a man sued (and won) against British Airways for selling a single seat to a massive person who ended up taking half of his seat as well as his own.

The stinky passenger


I'm not trying to single out a particular nationality here but I have been on flights in certain parts of Asia where the men are dressed to the nines but apparently have never heard of deodorant. How it is that someone can have nicely pressed slacks, a lovely silk shirt and designer belt and shoes on while at the same time smelling as though they haven't seen the inside of a WC in weeks is beyond me. B.O. is one of the worst things in the world and when you are placed in close proximity to a person like this that you can not avoid or escape, this becomes a personal hell. In one flight I actually went and pleaded with the flight attendant to get me to another seat because i thought i would get sick if I had to continue sitting next to this man. This one was of the only times in my life that I have ever been upgraded to business class because when I told her this, in secrecy, she was already aware of it and had noticed it herself. She discreetly moved me up to a seat that was so much nicer than the one that I had before.

By the way, do not attempt this tactic as a chance to get a free upgrade - I am very surprised it worked that one time for me. Thanks Malaysian Airlines!

The inattentive parent


Traveling is stressful enough without having to deal with screaming kids. There are a number of airlines that are (well I guess "were" before the world got shut down) starting to have flights where people under 12 years of age are not even allowed on the flight at all. I would pay more for this if I had to. Or how about an additional section in the back of the plane where all the screaming kids can be cordoned off away from the rest of us.

Anyway, I'm not talking about the children so much as I am talking about the parents in this situation. Kids are jerks sometimes but if they are subjected to good parenting they can be kept under control. I have been on flights where parents just let their kids wander, crawl all over the place and scream their heads off because mommy actually isn't able to open the window so junior can go crawl around on the wings of the airplane.

The chatty Kathy

I don't understand these people and thankfully they are quite rare. I don't really see airlines as a "getting to know you" type situation but there are a select few people out there that think this is a great time to meet and greet all those that are sitting around them. Thankfully headphones are a really great way to get out of this situation but I have actually been seated next to a guy that was such as chatterbox that he would tap me on the shoulder every time he had something to say.

I eventually made up a lie about how I was studying language on my iPod and would appreciate it if he would stop interrupting me. This eventually worked but then he acted upset and hurt for a bit and then moved on to the person on the other side of the aisle, who also didn't want to talk to him.

Sorry person on the other side!

For the most part, airplane travel is tough enough without these annoyances being mixed in and I certainly hope that you are not one of the people that I described. If you are, know that you are loathed by almost everyone and perhaps it is time to reflect on how you can help us all who are trapped in this metal tube thousands of meters off the ground not want to kill you.