Yes, I know you are grappling with more than I can imagine. I think about my wife, and I can't imagine parting ways at this point let alone the amount of years you guys were together. Losing Molly, most likely pails in comparison. But we've been through it a few times, and, death seems to harden one in certain ways. Not sure if that's good or bad. Losing pepper prior to this helped. In a way, I don't like thinking about it that way, but it has helped. I guess we cannot escape the constant reminders, they just become part of the healing process, I suppose.
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You are right in saying death does kind of harden one in a way.
I've lost close family, young and old, and it was heartwrenching each time, but one learns to build a 'shell' to soften the blow.
That shell was broken when I lost my husband!
One cannot compare grief, as we have a special place in our hearts for those we love. but if it's someone we see daily, like your little Pepper and Molly, it becomes a little harder.
We need to look back at those memories, and talk about them, cry, and laugh, as that is all part of the healing process.
However, the loss of a child is quite unthinkable, and not something any parent should have to go through. My Mom had to deal with losing two children in the prime of their lives, and she never got over that.
When it comes to one's life partner and soulmate, we know that we will one day have to say farewell, but nothing can prepare one for that feeling of utter despair that they will never be back again.
I say to people, appreciate every moment you have together, and don't leave things unsaid, as you may never get the chance to do it.
If only I could have had just one more day!