“In reality, these phone calls from people Papa used to know actually bother me a little bit – I feel like I learn patience from them, because Papa can kill a person with that voice on the phone, and he doesn't do that any more, but enough is really getting to be enough.”
This was eleven-year-old Eleanor Ludlow, eldest grandchild of Capt. R.E. Ludlow talking with her best friend eleven-year-old Velma Trent.
“Grandma Gladys says about election years that you find out real quick who thinks their lives come from politics and who knows their life comes from God,” Velma said.
“See, this is why I'm probably going to move back up with my Lee-of-the-Mountain relatives and be close to your Jubilee-of-the-mountain relatives, because this is ridiculous,” Eleanor said.
“It is,” Velma said, “but it's good when the fish are biting, Eleanor.”
“What do you mean?”
“Everybody calling your grandfather and my dad are just jumping onto the hook so they can come to Christ or get their lives back together with Him, because you know neither of the men are having any nonsense.”
Eleanor started laughing.
“This is true!” she said, and the two girls had a good laugh.
“Don't call anyone over here if you want to stay in the foolishness!” Velma said.
“But then what happens for the people who are not calling?” Eleanor said.
Eleanor's ten-year-old brother Andrew joined in there.
“The Lord could have them calling someone else,” he said, “but you know, even at ten years old, what I learned from my actual parents and about half my foster parents is that some people love the foolishness and aren't trying to get out more than they love the foolishness.”
“Same here – you know Andrew and I are really first cousins and that whole situation,” Eleanor said.
“Yes,” Velma said, “and I have some first cousins who are lost in the sauce too.”
“I've never quite understood that saying,” Andrew said.
“Your baby brother can explain it – hey Rob, got a food choice for you!” Velma said.
“Food? Where?” five-year-old Lil' Robert Ludlow said as he came running.
“You like my dad's barbecue, right?” Velma said.
“No, I love it, because, see, I need to get to like seven feet tall so I can get all I want – I have a real all soul but I need the rest of me to catch up!”
“OK, so, would you rather have the sauce, or the meat?”
“I need both, Velma! I need both!”
“OK, I'm making a note for Dad,” Velma said.
“Thank you!” Lil' Robert said and then hugged Velma and got hugs from his big siblings before going back to his seat.
“I get it,” Andrew said. “Rob is not lost in the sauce; he knows you need both. Balance.”
“So, it's like, we need politics, and we need things to relieve our minds, but we don't need too much of anything,” said Eleanor, who then frowned. “How does Rob have more sense than most grown people?”
“It's his real tall soul,” Velma said, with a gentle laugh.
“Yeah, he does have a real tall soul,” Andrew said. “But Rob also has a really good mind – he's basically talking all the time because his head does not have room for his brain at this point, but if you listen to him, he makes as much sense as he can at that age.”
“Rob is stable, like Papa,” Eleanor said. “He knows right from wrong as much as he can at his age – he understands goodness and fairness, and he's not budging off of those. He's got a stable personality.”
“Right, and most people if you put money in front of them or something they want more than they care about goodness and fairness, they are not so stable,” Velma said. “But see, human nature actually is stable in the way Grandma Gladys talks about it like a Jubilee-of-the-mountain: humans doing dumb stuff to get what they want and then getting what happens when you do dumb stuff is common.”
“Is it ever!” Eleanor and Andrew said.
“But the thing is,” Velma said, “when you know where you live from, it doesn't have to bother you as much.”
“Yeah,” Andrew said.
“So, we're just gonna let people who need to get fished over to where we are keep calling Papa and biting the hook,” Eleanor said, “with no need to go Edwina mode.”
“None,” Andrew and Velma said.
“We pray she grow out of it all soon,” Velma said, “because if not, Gracie [her eight-year-old baby sister] has been quietly putting bottles of water up on the table to get them blessed at dinner so they can be holy. You can learn a lot by eavesdropping on your big siblings watching The Exorcism.”
Lil Robert has it all figured out, and Gracie is prepared for the ones who don't. God Bless them.
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Yep ... Gracie is getting the holy water ready, and Lil' Robert is doing the best he can to figure it out!