Becoming a man: Marriage, Culture and finance

in LeoFinance2 months ago

Hello Hiveians
As a man, one of the happiest moments of your life is the day you get to walk down the aisle with that special person in your life, taking your vows to love for better or worse in sickness and in health knowing in your heart of heart that you have found the ONE. Looking at it from this angle to would definitely say that it's indeed a happy moment, one every man and even woman would relish and ofcource it is so emotionally and all but then is it so rosy and all just like the wedding pictures would make it seem?

Growing up in my country Nigeria, one of the very important steps a man has to take when seeking for the hand of a woman in marriage is the fulfillment of all cultural rights. Cultural rights in this aspect has to do with the groom having to pay Bride Price to the family of the bride.

In a way, a man would have to chose his demon if I will put it that way as Nigeria Is a country with so many languages and every language has its own culture amd traditions. There are some who will require next to nothing as Bride Price for their daughter on one hand and there are some who require huge amount for bride Price.

THE LIST
There is something called LIST and for every man who feels he has found the one would definitely get familiar with this so called LIST that would be given to you. This list contains several items that the groom has to purchase and provide to this brides family.

THE LIST AND FINANCIAL IMPLICATIONS
Like I mentioned earlier, marriage list and it's financial implications is determined by the part of the country the bride is coming from. There is a general consensus though that the highest is comes from the southern part of thr country.
For example if you are marrying a yoruba lady, here below is an example of a bride price list

eru-lyawo-list-for-introduction-yourba-traditional-engagement-2021-1-768x1083.jpg
Photo credit: https://www.weddingfeferity.com/yoruba-wedding-engagement-list/
Aside this list where you have to make financial commitments there is also another list entirely where you will have to buy several other things such as:

  1. Tubers of yam
  2. Bottles of non alcoholic drinks
  3. Bag of rice
    4)Bag of salt
  4. plan oil
  5. palm wine
  6. Bitter kola
    And so on and so forth.

Is-Bride-Price-oCurrency-Actually-Appreciating-In-Igbo-Land.jpg
photo credit: https://theeasternupdates.com/2020/08/03/is-bride-price-ocurrency-actually-appreciating-in-igbo-land/

This here is just from a particular tribe in nigerian. For a lady coming from the southern part of Nigeria, the guy will have to make payment that will end up running into millions which is not so easy for an average Nigerian man to provide.

IMPLICATION OF HIGH BRIDE PRICE
Due to this high bride price, it most times takes long for an average Nigerian guy to beat his chest and say he is ready to ask for the hand of a lady in marriage as he has to provide all these materials that are asked for if not the marriage will not be held. The financial implications of this makes the step into marriage a very hard and not so easy of a step for a guy to take. So many guys will be in their early thirties or even late thirties before they are even ready to make that step.

DEBT FINANCED MARRIAGE
SOme other guys will have to finance thier marriage by borrowing from friend or the bank just to be able to have a problem free marriage ceremony but what happens after is period of time where the man will have to spend the next few months or even years settling those debts, its not so easy.

Well, if not anything i know I am not ready for marriage 😭
Thank you all for visiting my blog and taking time to view.

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Thanks for this different point of view.
I haven't been in Nigeria and it seems so far from Europe.
Probably I'll go in your country: there are many people in Hive who write from Africa and Nigeria in particular.
It should be a nice country and thank you again to have told us something more about this place.
Ah and I hope you and your wife will be happy together. I do not know how say in english: happy marriage?

Yes it's happy marriage and some will say happy married life. But I am not married yet, still at the dating stage and hoping to take the big step soon.
Thanks anyways