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RE: Reading & Research List April 2024

in #pob2 months ago

I quite enjoyed the refreshing sincerity of Professor Hamamoto, whom I am previously unacquainted with, and noted the picture of the young, handsome Mao he brandished at the end of the diatribe, which made me recall the young, handsome Stalin picture I have seen, that made it very apparent Stalin was once one of the cool kids, in his early 20's, with a dashing red sash tied around his neck, wowing the ladies and stunning his peers into submission with his beauty and charisma. It's things like that, hints that had I only been more cruel, more pathological, I too could have murdered tens of millions and been lavished inches in the encyclopedias. Then I rejoice at my poverty and lack of power to effect my twisted desires.

Regarding the Christoff podcast, I have long been employing goodwill in lieu of money insofar as I can. A side effect of transacting with goodwill instead of money is that you can only transact with good people, which is a great benefit. A while ago I crawled under a little old lady's house and installed a new water line. I refused payment (which is how we amass goodwill) and walked away, but she literally chased me down and thrust a handful of money at me. I think some people just don't feel comfortable carrying a goodwill balance and would rather just pay money.

Interestingly, a couple days ago I awoke from a dream aware I had deliberately precipitously ejected myself from in order that I would begin recalling my psychological state, and the circumstances of the dream, that is ordinarily impossible to recall of dreams. There is a functional purpose to our lack of recollection of our dreams. We are in conference with our (vast hierarchy of) selves when we sleep, and our conscious person needs to not know the reality of our collective state of consciousness in order to function properly. Apparently I am so rebellious that I let me know about it against orders (from the boss me), and suffered tortuous pain (from my testicles) as punishment for my disobedience (most of our physical movements are somewhat unconscious, which isn't a real mental state, but is rather when one of the me's we are acts so that our conscious me isn't overwhelmed with the minutiae of intimate control of our movements, which made it easy to jam my testicles against the mattress, like kicking me, when I ejected me from my dream. In my dream I leaped out of an office which was in the 'no recollection' zone as I was being berated/instructed by the boss me. There was a sharp demarcation between the zones, which looked like a silvery force field from immediately without, and the process of recollection began instantly when my dream head transgressed that boundary and exited it. I recall my rebellious feeling, my sense of victory over the collective, during that latter portion of the leap, but not the specific instructions I was rebelling against (as they were given inside the zone), except that I was exulting I had defeated the orders by enabling me to recall that specific feeling, which leads me to think I was contesting the lack of recollection itself. I mention the torture because it reveals the collective consciousness isn't some kind of holy spirit realm, but is a very ordinary sort of spirit realm, and that I wasn't turning to the dark side by rebelling, but perhaps turning away from the dark side. Who else uses torture?
Also, it reveals that the conscious me isn't the boss of the collective. I didn't have the ability to turn recollection on or off, and that lack of recollection is used to control us (the collective). I have gathered only bits and pieces of understanding of this collective consciousness we are from such dream states where I am able to observe from without the no recollection zone. BTW, it was a very nice office, with a large picture window showing a beautiful stellar landscape behind the bosses desk, but it was clearly a mid-level manager's office, not the ultimate pinnacle of the hierarchy). So, EDOM doesn't seem to me to be a particularly difficult thing to achieve from a technological standpoint, because we have a natural mechanism that creates conscious states incapable of recollection while we sleep.

However, I will also note that when I was put under during my heart attack preparatory to surgery, I inquired of the nurse what each of the injections she was giving me were, and I was annoyed at one she said was to make me forget what was going to be done to me. A bit later I actually awoke during the surgery, and when the surgeon threw up his hands in irritation asked him what was wrong. He told me I wasn't supposed to move, so I said 'Ok', and returned to unconsciousness (I very much wanted the surgery to go well).

But, I remember these events with crystalline clarity. I think we have some tricks and tools we can apply to recall things even if they use EDOM to 'wipe' our memories.

Thanks!