Major K.D. Mueller smiled gently … it was a bittersweet feeling, knowing that his most challenging but also favorite patient to complete an intensive EMDR therapy course was going to complete it early – this was the official last day, because Capt. R.E. Ludlow had resolved everything he needed to resolve, all the way back to his relationship with his father.
“I saw him last night … I remembered the last time I talked with him, to be frank,” the captain said. “It was a good conversation, though difficult … he had been too wrapped up in his work to be a particularly present father, but he had been an excellent grandfather, and he and I talked about that. He had become a Christian, for real, at the end, and that actually helped me to see the difference so I also would truly come to Christ at 39. What I remember was that he was able to say to me how he wished he had been more present in my life, and that I did not need to make the same mistakes that he did.
“What I said to him, in my dream, is that I had followed his mistakes for too long for his grandchildren, my children, and we sat and mourned together, but then I said that I will be both father and grandfather to his great-grandchildren, and I will apply what he taught me at the end. In my dream he was well enough to get out of bed and embrace me, and to tell me he is looking forward to seeing me again in due time. Then, Major, I woke up. All is well. It is all healed now. I know what I am to do.”
The major noticed his patient was deeply and radiantly calm … what a change from six weeks earlier!
“Well then, we may consider this big, big session over, and as you wish, we will be able to give that last two weeks to Lieutenant Wilson, starting Monday.
“Now, you can go home, Captain, but I suggest you spend the time you are not going to be spending with Lieutenant Wilson with your wife. Slowly work your way to passing the night with her, and see how you do in terms of nightmares. Work in your journal extensively, every day, and sing as much as you can. Establish good habits to maintain yourself in the new, deeper equilibrium. You're used to high internal tension, and what we sometimes will do is mentally create the situations we're used to if we don't take care to settle in the change.”
“PTSD strikes again in a whole new way,” the captain said.
“Right, but we can head that tendency off,” Maj. Mueller said. “Now also, you and your wife think about your schedule when you get home – your being away has not stopped the Ludlow Bubbly from burgeoning.”
“I told you that I know what I am to do. The company has a potential buyer – several, actually, because I have heard from Maj. Dubois that the workers are so into it that they would like to buy it. I have eight reasons that I cannot afford to get wrapped up in a business that is going to get as big as it is getting – nine, counting myself.”
“Always count yourself, Captain,” the major said, “since so many count on you. I don't suppose you will need employment ever again.”
“I most certainly will, because that sale is not for me. That's for my grandchildren's inheritance. Think of what it will cost to live in 2035! In the meantime, I will still need to supplement my pension, but I am sure the Lord will provide.”
“Well, first of all, I happen to have talked with a Col. F.V. Wozniak, and he says there are nine recording projects looking for you – and looking desperately, because basso profundo is so rare.”
“Really?” Capt. Ludlow said.
“And, there's a job at the Veteran's Lodge looking for a place to happen. There are a whole lot of Lieutenant Wilsons who need encouragement, and we have room on our support team that works from here to the state's Veteran's Administration Hospitals.”
“So, y'all think I can growl some folks into getting the treatment they need!”
“And are willing to pay you to do it, Captain!”
“Send me the job description in two weeks, Major. I used to work in housing from the Veteran's Lodge, but these landlords off this base were not trying to do better and I couldn't get better working that job – but what you are talking about here … I think I could, because that fits with the singing, and with what I have to do with my little ones: this voice must be used now primarily for growth and healing.”
“I don't think we're going to find anyone more dedicated or integral to the total process, Captain, than you.”
“I shall think and pray in this next two weeks about it, Major … and then I will be ready to review the specifics.”
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