Yes! I used to be one of those people who considered going at a slow pace as a form of laziness. I believed that by being fast, you achieve a lot, gain a lot, life will be good, and you will be happy. I mean, it is plain and simple, almost like saying “The fastest wins the race”.
I grew up with a parent who has two different personalities. My mom was someone who would barely take a rest; everything about her was always fast. She was hardworking and barely chose to rest, but no doubt, she is a lovely mother because she mostly does all this in the name of “being there for her family”.
On the other hand, my dad is someone who loves to move slowly and take breaks. He is also hardworking, but the difference between them is that he is always calm and he takes time to enjoy every moment.
Naturally, I was never like my mom and I don’t think any of my siblings were either. We would plead with our mom to take things slow and take breaks. Sometimes, we’d teased her, saying when we grow all big she would no longer be running her business because we would provide for her, we tease her that she would still be occupied but she would laugh and say “no, I won’t” but we doubt she would.
My mom lives like every minute counts, and it shouldn’t be joked with, and this has always made me think I was lazy and I wasn’t serious with my life, so I started trying to live at a fast pace. I never really realised that it wasn’t so until I grew up a little bit older.
One thing I realised when I grew up was the effect these personalities had on them. I noticed how my mom easily gets so worried and anxious even on little things, and my dad was always calm like he had peace within him.
I knew what I wanted, and it was definitely not being anxious; I wanted the peace and calmness that comes with living at a slow pace. I decided to focus more on my dad’s lifestyle.
He also works hard, but it comes with breaks and a little self-care. I would see my dad prepare his favourite soup in the evening, read books, enjoy some music, sometimes he asks us to put on some movies for me, and sometimes he even munches on snacks (which I thought wasn’t meant for adult, lol)
I can’t count how many times my mom came to us to complain about dad being so nonchalant and how he would turn a deaf ear to certain things, but we would always calm her down. Although, regardless of this difference, they were a good couple, if not the best I have seen.
When we tried to talk to my mom, she would tell me and my sister that we didn’t understand, and that when we became a mother, we would understand her. This word usually gives me a scare, lol, but I have never taken my time to ponder on it, but I guess when the time comes, we will figure it out.
My dad would always say this in our native language but I will try to interpret it “The world is moving and we that are in it are just following it.” Which basically means as the world is going, we follow the trend and always want to be among.
He would also say, “Control what you can, and worry less about those you can’t.” He is a strong believer of God, so he’d tell us, “You can’t control it? Fine. Lay your worries on God”
I gave up the fast-paced life; it was never meant for me. All I get from it was extra stress. I have tried slow living, and I prefer it. Slow living to me is like saying “Be calm, stay in the present, the future is yet come.”, it has made me value the present moment and try to enjoy it to the fullest.
I remember how I would try to meet up with the expectation of the world. I would compare myself with people of my age that are always occupied. I would try to wake up so early, and ended up in the bed late, always so tired to get up the next morning, but I would force myself to, in the name of wanting to be productive.
Slow living shows how self care is important; it removes headaches and anxiety. It helps me keep calm in this fast paced world. It shows the importance of gratitude, which most people barely have time for.
For me, my dad had me realised that slow living isn’t laziness, it just simply means avoiding being burned out. I know most people might consider it as laziness, but I have learnt from both sides, and I can say isn’t, unless you purposely choose to be lazy.
☘︎
“Nature doesn’t hurry, yet everything is accomplished.” ~ Lao Tzu
I love this quote a lot
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