I also faced situations when I had to choose between forgiving or forgiving. I do not say it was easy, but it was not impossible for me to forgive myself when the person who has wronged me has asked for forgiveness. But what to do when I have no one to forgive, or more specifically, the one who has wronged me either does not recognize her mistake, or does not want to forgive her forgiveness. Should I forgive him?

Peter came to the Lord Jesus and asked him, "How many times will I forgive my brother when he fails against me? Seven times? ". Even St. Peter faced situations in which he had to forgive and even expected that others would appear. He does not say "if he does wrong" but "when he does wrong." Everything is just a matter of time. Those around us will be wrong against us, but we will also be wrong against them. We have to get used to the idea. We live in the aftermath of man's fall into sin, we are all people who are mistaken, we all are wrong and we are wrong with each other. Being aware of this, we need to know not only that we are going to make mistakes for those around us, and we must ask for forgiveness, but also that we will face the situation of choosing or not to forgive.
In the Bible, Jesus says, "If you do not forgive men for their mistakes, neither your heavenly Father will forgive you your wrongdoings" (Matthew 6:15). In the Lord's Prayer we say, "... and forgive us our transgressions, as we forgive our sinners." There were times when we could not speak this prayer. I wanted God to forgive me but not as I forgive my fellow men. Elsewhere the apostle Paul says, "forgive one another, as God has forgiven you in Christ." (Ephesians 4:32). God seeks to make us forgive our fellow men but gives us a model: "as He has forgiven us." How did he forgive us? When did he forgive us? When did we ask for forgiveness or before?

Do I have to forget to forgive? Many repeat the slogan "I forgive you, but I do not look!" In fact, this is still unforgiving. In fact, you say, "I abstain for a moment." This slogan gives the wrong impression that in order to forgive you must forget. Nothing more fake! Is the fact that God has forgiven me that God forgot what I did? Not! God has not forgotten, but has chosen not to treat me in the light of my past.
What is forgiveness ?!
Forgiveness is a decision and a choice not to treat the person who mistaken me in the light of the evil he has done to me. Forgiveness is a decision not to question the past issue to blackmail the wrong person. Forgiveness is the decision not to talk to others about the person who has wronged me and not to persist thinking about what he has wronged me. This is forgiveness!
Do not expect to forget to forgive! By the very simple fact that you are proposing to forget, you remember and you will not be able to forget. You must not forget to forgive, but you have to forgive and so you will forget.
Where do I find power to forgive?
The answer is even given to us by the Lord Jesus: "A king wanted to reckon with his servants. He began to account and brought the one who owed him ten thousand yellow. For he had nothing to pay for, his lord commanded him to sell him, his wife, his children, and all that he had, and his duty to be paid. And the servant bowed himself to the earth, and worshiped him, and said, Lord, let me, and I will pay you all. The master of that servant, having pity him, let him go, and forgave his debt. That servant, when he went out, met one of his friends who owed him a hundred lei. He took his hand, and he gathered him on his neck, saying, Pay me what you owe me! His friend fell on the ground, prayed him, and said, "Let me go and pay you!" But he did not want to, but went and threw him in the dungeon until he paid his debt. When his friends saw what had happened, they were very sad and went away to tell their master what had happened. Then the lord called to him this servant, and said to him, "Sly, I have forgiven you all my duty because you have asked me." Do not you have the pity of your friend as I have pity on you? And the master was angry, and gave him to the oppressors ... "(Matthew 18: 23-34)
To be able to forgive you must first have known the value of God's forgiveness. Only one forgiven by God can forgive God. God has forgiven us for a long time. The mistake of our fellow man toward us, compared to our guilt towards God, is infinitely small. Because He has forgiven us for the sake of God, we can forgive Him with His help. But by the way, do you have the forgiven sins? Have you been forgiven by God? He gave you forgiveness to the cross when the Lord Jesus paid the guilt of our sins. He forgave us when we did not care for Him, but you must also come in humility and receive the forgiveness of the Lord Jesus. The power of giving forgiveness is the power you receive only by receiving with humility and gratitude the forgiveness of the Lord Jesus.
agreed
Do not let love and faithful leave you
Put it on your neck and write it in your heart
Then you will receive love and appreciation in the sight of God and man
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