Announcing "Ultimate Zoo Battle": A Tournament Style Deathmatch Between Zoo Animals!

in #comedy6 years ago

Is your tender, unassuming body ready for the event of the century? Enter the ruthless, brutal world of Ultimate Zoo Battle! Every day, two animals commonly found in a zoo will be pit against each other in a fight to the death! Which will emerge victorious?

YOU decide. Vote for which animal you want to win, and write a brief explanation of why you think it would emerge victorious. The decision will be made based on the crowd favorite, balanced against the quality of the reasoning given in support of one or the other combatant's victory.

The rules are simple. Two animals enter, one animal leaves. In matches between a land animal and aquatic animal, the battlefield will be flooded up to a height where both animals can move comfortably, or divided in half between a land and water area as necessary.

When the dust and blood settle, there will be only one remaining survivor, crowned the Grand Champion of Ultimate Zoo Battle. It begins tomorrow, so pick your favorite combatant now and begin devising strategies!


Stay Cozy!

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I vote for the komodo! His stealth skills deceive everyone's and he manages to strike just in the right time!

Penguin will be the ultimate winner... I m roaring for penguin... 😝😝😝

I pick human, because he is a tricky bastard. Nothing can stop him.
He will tame elephant, tiger, shark and alligator and send them to clean the mess!

Yaay! This is going to be super fun! I am excited now to get this going.

The dolphin will defeat the bee swarm. It will rape the bees to death.

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The cobra beats the ferret, the cobra can strike much faster on top of having venom. That is a one sided fight.

No way! Ferret has totally got this. They are ruthless. Haven't you ever seen Ricky Ticky Tavy??? He kicks so much cobra ass.

Chimpanzee and penguin, man that's not fair. Chimpanzee can beat the penguin with closed eyes.

That sound really exciting. It’s a brilliant idea. I’m curious what kind of animals there will be. Gorillas 🦍, sharks 🦈, lion 🦁, tigers 🐅?

It says which ones in the picture.

I just noticed. I think Baboon vs an alligator will be no brainer. Unless you put a gun into hi hands. lol coyote vs human? I guess humans belong in zoo as well. Not surprising.

Can you defend against cuteness of a penguin!? I think penguin will be number one.
He just needs to let someone scratch his tummy.

Cannot wait! Please tell me there will be illustrations and descriptions depicting the battles.

That’s quite awesome! I was gonna go pick the the bees but then I remembered that they are dying after thet sting.. not like the annoying wasps. Oh well got time till tomorrow to pick!

Oh boy! This will be fun. Bee swarm is a good one, definitely pretty tough to defend against. I'm not sure how well the human is going to make out. Picking a favorite among em all is tough though, so I guess I'll have to pick through elimination :)

Dang, I wanted to root for the giraffe, but I don't think it stands a chance.

I think either the gorilla or the grizzly will win it.

Haha sounds fun! Let the fights begin!

I am disappointed that Panda is not competing this year. After so many years as undefeated, I guess they just needed a break.

This is going to go viral, well steemit viral I think. Hell of a contest idea. I have no clue I can see several winners, and some losers, but an over-all is gonna be tough.

Wow so many evenly matched opponents. Coming from Canada I can see the Grizzly taking down the Cheetah. I mean a race it would be a no brainer.. but a one on one battle the Grizly is a ferocious can be 270KG of raw muscle. One blow to the cheetah and that thing is flat on its ass. The Grizly in close combat is a huge animal but also has quite good agility. I can't see the cheetah being able to compete here.

It will be a really big battle
I expect Assad to be the strongest
I wish you success

excellent post@thanks for sharing

Rhino lion and black bear hippo will be the best fights, let me see who wins. Can I see it on YouTube.

it will be alot of fun .
looking forward for Rhino vs Lion

I think grand champion will be penguin.. :D

Imagine this happening in real... Woshh... Is human allowed with some weapon?

Which will emerge victorious?

Human: The Most Dangerous Animal

This is super fun @alexbeyman
So...anaconda will struggle poor ostrich to death
No hope for the ostrich

Gooooooooooooooooooo sharks!!

The human wins . he's already killed everything on the list multiple times . Heck he most likely killed some of them listed already .

Dang, I wanted to root for the giraffe, but I don't think it stands a chance.

I think either the gorilla or the grizzly will win it.
Thanks You So much

Why did you think I wouldn't notice you've copied and pasted somebody else's comment from this same comments section?