I feel for you. My parents were lucky enough to be cursed with 2 children who failed to meet their expectations which has forced them to grow as people.
As we are two very different kinds of failures, neither of which fit textbook definitions of failure and both of which are quite happy, they’ve had to explore many different ideas of what success means and see, to be slowly coming around. They sure did a lot of damage despite really caring, when we were young though.
:)
My Father still believes that his way is the only way!
I like the sound of your folks.
xox