I have one of those worms in my brain also. I don't know what other things you have lost but I am nearly offline and hating this place I am in so much... wanting to just pick up and leave again, it feels like it is killing me.
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Well, the external world is most likely a reflection of your inner world. I've tried to solve my problems by moving my whole life, starting when I was 18 years old. I moved to Canada alone, to escape a world I hated. I've been running ever since then. This is the first time in my life when I cannot run anymore. I think that's killing me. I plan on moving back to the beach with nothing once my motherhood role is done.