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Have you ever read the book 'the virtue of selfishness'?
guess not.
We're SO lucky to have you safeguard the morals of our society.

Pursuit of self interest is not selfishness. Life is a game (with high stakes) in which everyone must play to win. Nothing wrong with that. I play to win. Selfishness is cheating at the game. Metaphorically, unselfish people are normal cells. Selfish people are cancer cells. As an activist, I am metaphorically a white blood cell.

Normal cells like me. Cancer cells do not.

it's some much easier when you get to make your own definitions.

Nothing wrong with me defining my terms. You are free to define them differently. I'm all ears.

if you can make the definitions to suite yourself you will never lose a debate.

I'm still waiting for you to define "selfishness". Defining your terms is not a tactic. Every term used in a debate must be clearly defined for the debate to even proceed. Normally, the definition of a word is not controversial as all participants have a common understanding of the term being used. But whenever it becomes apparent that participants are using a term to mean different things, reasonable people of good will will take a moment to negotiate a common definition so that the debate can proceed without confusion.

You have my cancer cell / normal cell metaphore. I think that expresses clearly the distinction that I have in mind regarding self interest versus selfishness. What exactly is your problem with looking at it that way? How do you want to look at "selfishness"?

selfishness is a hijacked word.
It's was originally a synonym for 'looking out for your own self interest'
to use it other wise is 'defining your terms deceptively'