I enjoyed your perspectives here @captainbob. As human beings, death and loss are probably the most difficult things to deal with. I think about these concepts frequently and man, it certainly is a constantly enlightening experience. Staying present, detaching from outcomes and expectations has been the most useful lesson for me thus far.
Side note: I really like the concept of having a (what I'm coining as) a "hospice shaman". My mom does similar work (personally soon professionally) and the impact of that work is tremendous.
Check out BJ Miller and the Zen Hospice Center. Interesting approach he and his team are taking.