I've heard this before and it gives me some sympathy for the people who do make those terribly destructive reports. So many console themselves with the thought of, "I know I had to make this report, but if nothing is really going on then no harm will be done."
Wrong. I remember having many conversations with my Nana, a retired nurse, about this. She was firmly convinced that CPS reports were completely harmless if the family wasn't hiding anything.
You're welcome and so am I!
Yes, it is hard to rationalize to yourself that you had to make this call (I never had to make one) but that it will be okay if they really aren't bad people. I do, however, have a friend who had CPS called on her special needs son by the teacher (who was trying to get even because my friend called the principal about the teacher possibly being abusive to her son). Anyway, CPS showed up, she let them in, interviewed them and the kids, etc. CPS said nothing was going on at home or at school and the case was closed. Granted, they are now in the system and have a file on the kids, but that was last year and they have had no calls or visits from CPS. I told her she was crazy for letting them in and trusting them ("they were so nice, I could just talk to them about whatever." - "you're crazy!! That's what they want is for you to just keep talking!") I just want people to wake up and see how this shouldn't be happening.
Having a special needs kid is a whole new ball park in this regard, too. My littlest brother has Down's and it has been a new realm of caution because no matter how old he gets, people always have their opinions on how he should be raised and treated. My mom has been really careful about making sure he is at every doctor's appointment, for instance, to make sure she has official record that he's been examined and she's followed medical advice because he's someone who could be reported on indefinitely. What a mess!
And the whole vindictive reporting...yikes. I don't even want to get started on that, other than to observe that one thing which can really make a family vulnerable is a divorce. Or children born outside of marriage. It seems to create a rift that is exploited at every opportunity. And you have conflict within the family, disgruntled in-laws, all kinds of messy stuff; and sometimes kids report on their parents just to get back at them for something they're mad about. The whole system is one giant mess.
Yes, my friend's son had a bad diaper rash. She thought the school was abusing him, they blamed the parents. It was kind of crazy, so it's good that he has a different teacher this year at a new school. When we were planning to move to Panama, I was afraid my family/friends would make a call because they did not agree with our decision. I'm sure there are families out there who would do that. I did not feel relief until we were actually in Panama.