The rain poured heavily as though it wept for me as I sat on the cold tile gulping down the bottle a bottle of whiskey, hoping it's bitterness would take away the face of karma, mocking my grief. I was being paid back for the wrongs I did, I was now feeling the pains I inflicted on those women who I shered their hearts which had nothing but love for me into a hundred pieces. I loved hurting women emotionally, I loved the way they clinged onto me, hoping they could fix me while I tormented them emotionally. The sorrowful gaze they held as they tried to hide their brokeness. The feeling of dominance I got, their pain was like fuel to my ego.
I grew up in an abusive home, my dad would hit my mum right in front of me, I saw the bruises on her face, I felt it in my heart. I resolved never to hit a woman, I didn't want to be like my dad, I didn't want to see the bruises of my unsuspecting victims. I just wanted to let out the anger and pain I felt each time my dad would hit mum. I chose to let it out by hurting the women too, only that I never did it physically but I guess it hurts more when it's emotionally done, at least I could feel it now.
I would wait till they were comfortable with me, till they trusted me and fell deeply for me, I didn't care how long it'd take, they were vulnerable at this point and then I'll attack. It wasn't hard, I was handsome, young, financially stable and of cause I'd draw pity from them using my childhood pains and how I'd never hurt a woman. They fell easily for those... The soft punches on my chest as they cried, a few would plead for me to love them again and the others would call on karma. I laughed at the word "karma" it was just a myth to me.
I remember one I really hurt, Bessie was her name, she would clean, cook, pray, advise and do a whole lots for me. She had caught me having sex with other women a couple of times but she'd still forgive and be with me. I guess she was the one angel I really lost. I knew I loved her, She was much of a good lady. She always forgave till I had sex with her sister. She caught us actually, the tears that rolled down her soft cheeks, she uttered no words as she turned back to leave. I should have chased after her but I didn't. I just drank the evening away with the boys. I knew deep down I had lost the moon chasing stars but I wasn't ready to retire.
Till I met Ivy, she gave me much of the mental challenge I wanted. I was a player but she, she was the coach of the game. She never cooked, always extracted from me, she was a bitch and I fell for this bitch. My karma had come. Till the day we got married, till the day we had our son, my supposed son I guess. She was using me, the boy wasn't my son, she had accused me of physical abuse and filled for an annulment. She was to take half of everything I had. On my way out of the court where my marriage was annulled I saw Bessie, she was coming in for her court marriage. She was held by the hands of a deserving man, a man who appreciated a good woman. I could feel my heart beat rapidly as she walked pass as tho I was a stranger.
Ivy took half of everything I had except my soul, she stabbed it to a thousand pieces. I now felt pain, the pain I had inflicted on every woman who had tried to love me, the pain I inflicted on Bessie. I couldn't even tell her how sorry I was, I realised there was actually no gain in being the flirt I was. Now I had to pay the price, it was too much, tears filled my eyes. I wished I could turn back time, I would have chosen to make things right. It now dawned on me that I wouldn't choose the pains I cause those women if I were asked to choose a punishment for my crimes, it was too much. Deep in my regrets I heard the thunder strike, I looked outside and I was starring right into the eyes of karma, the bitch smiled at me.
Woww.. Some piece this is.
😣😣😣
Still...
Lol😀😀😀 what?
Not just touching ...
But still. That flirt tendency that keeps drawing a mans soul.... 😤
Its very strong .
Right in the feels there dude.
Good story. Romans 7 and 8 are quite inspiring. I do believe we reap what we sow. Knowing that should motivate us to live better. I have had to learn that I am not my father. I can make my own choices, and pave my own path. You can too. Godspeed.