Tears | 50 Word Short Story

in #fiction6 years ago

Raising the fiction bar on Steemit one 50 word story at a time, @jayna has issued a new writing prompt for the 50 Word Story Challenge. I haven't ever tried flash fiction at this length before, so I thought I'd give it a shot. The latest prompt for the challenge is: tear.



The rift drew closer to the station. A colossal tear in space-time, looming behind the final escape pod.

Inside, Jeffrey waved happily. Unaware, but so perfect.

She shuddered. “You fucking look after him, Tom.”

He nodded, buckling himself in.

With a final look at her baby, she sealed the hatch.





Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://www.thinknzombie.com/tears-50-word-short-story/

Sort:  

Way to cram so much suspense in 50 words!

Thanks @minismallholding. I really appreciate the feedback. :-)

Nice work! A couple minor changes make such a big difference.

Big thanks to you @negativer for the editing and advice.

Oh, this is fun, @thinknzombie! Absolutely phenomenal first 50-word story. I love how you placed a very human drama against an intriguing sci-fi backdrop. Well done!

Thanks @jayna! I had a lot of help from @bex-dk and @negativer. This was much harder to do editing-wise than I expected but so much fun. Thank you for running this challenge!

I do love the challenge of crafting something complete and satisfying to read in 50 words. I’m so glad you had fun with it, @thinknzombie! By the way, be sure to add your story link to a comment on the post. That way other #fiftywords participants will see it.

Thank you! I totally forgot!

It was you. We just tweaked. And I also brainstormed. That DREAM method you found helped, I think. Mine is coming soon. I'm behind.

You did such a great job on that, Andrew!!! Hugs

good contest..This will be a great opportunity for most of us @thinknzombie.