It is not a happy thought but it is also good to admit these thoughts exist and do exist forva reason. As a little child I was quiet sure I am adopted. I never liked my mom so I also never blamed her for disliking me. She blamed me for all the bad things in her life, including my dad leabing her. I told her if she would have taking anti conception I would not be born. I still believe that would not have been such a bad thing at all. Again I am taken responsible for other people their misery. Each time I am surprised about that again.
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I think your parents and other 'adult' people made you responsible for their feelings, I know they did because I read a lot of your stories. My dad did that too. And that's so wrong! Because later on you still believe you are responsible for what other people are going through. At least that's what happened to me.
But you 'must' blame your mother for disliking you! You were a child, she was an adult, she chose to have you! You didn't chose her.
I guess it is something most parents/people do.. blaming their children/others instead of themselves. I doubt my mother did choose me