The Dark Side Of Me You Wouldn't Wanna Know

in #freewrite4 months ago

I wanna die.

Firstly, because of depression.

Obviously.

But I wanna live at the same time.

Intrsuive thoughts sucks and it suffocates the hell out of me.

I wonder about my sexuality.

I know I'm straight. But because of pornography, my mind tends to wander off the beautiful crevices of a woman's breasts and groin. But I don't like the feeling of being personally touched by a woman.

Other inappropriate stuff?

Aside from suicide:

MURDER.

I picture murdering the people I hate/got angry with in the back of my mind.

How wonderful and scary are the backs of our minds. Have you gone there? I went there once and all I can see is... nothing.

I believe in Jesus. But sometimes, because of rage, depression, hopelessness, and failure, I tend to shift back and be an atheist. Just blaspheme on the name of the Lord. But I don't verbalize it or what.


Again, I just throw it all in the back of my mind.

Seriously, the mind is the most dangerous place. LITERALLY. A lot of stuff comes in and out of it. Be it good or bad, advantage or disadvantage.

Sex.
Violence.
Greed.



33224988798_61eba8e553_z.jpg
"An Old Woman" (‘The Ugly Duchess’) by Quinten Massys



Hi guys. It felt like a millennium being back on hive and write some good old freewrites again. I saw this awesome post from Freewriters and just had to jump in on the fun. #freewrite #dailyprompt


I wrote this very bold and honest story for 5 minutes. If you felt any uncomfort reading it, I apologize. All of these stuff I said is hidden within the deepest part of my brain. To other people, especially those who knows me, see me as that "sugar-and-spice-and-everything-nice" kind of girl. But really, deep inside this body is a hideous and frightening creature. Hence, the painting of Quinten Massys: The Ugly Duchess. Hope you liked reading it, though! 😄

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I did like reading it, indeed.

Awesome! Glad you liked it. 😊😊😊

Mhmm, kinda hits home, before I became comfortable with my kinks.

Good for you. I got a good amount of kinks but only a few are being actually done. hahahahaa

Snakes, talkin' walls, spiral eyes, white noise and mirror-talk before bed.

I was reminded of my childhood when you mentioned "mirror-talk." Since I'm an only child, I often play by myself. I talk to the mirror by myself and create scenarios in my mind, like for example, I am some sort of damsel in distress and I'm having an argument with my prince but in a british accent. 😂

I hope you find peace sometime, somehow, somewhere in that brain.

Thank you. I yearn for peace so I actually hunt them down. Appreciate for the nice words! 💕


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