Freewrite #3 : When your flame merely flickers..

in #freewrite6 years ago

How do you know when you've hit your bottom? What do you do when your flame burns out?


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As I'm writing this article my motivation and willpower is sub-zero. I have just previously made attempts on writing two different articles but they both turned out crap. The last couple of days have just been inexplicably awful and this is my last effort before I'll take a well needed break for the rest of the day.

I usually find myself pretty good at determining when I need to take a break or when it's time to push harder. Although , these last couple of days have been different. Rather than experiencing an apparent feeling and symtoms indicating that I would need to put the foot off the gas, it feels like I've been living in a smog of mixed, vague emotions, stranded between two borders of action.

During the day I've been applying my personal set of tools I find useful for recovering energy. Having an idea of what activities and triggers you personally respond well to would I say is a must-have in general. Today unfortunately, this was to no avail.

As my studies went shit around noon and my emotional tank was drained - I responded in a first attempt of taking a power-nap. I snoozed three times and felt even more horrid waking up.

I figured I might could need to get some lunch, so I plugged in my favourite crypto-podcast and went for a walk outside, ending up at my favourite healthy-food restaurant and had an incredibly meal.

Still felt like crap.

As I got home I didn't even glance at my studies and decided to write my planned articles - you guessed it - I threw away both of them.

William a couple of years back wouldn't have tolerated a loss and would continue a bloody battle into the depths of despair and frustration.

Luckily I've improved a bit in that matter.

There is a major difference between surrendering and just accepting that today isn't just your day.

Sometimes we just don't have the energy to execute on our planned tasks.

The courageous decision isn't then to keep banging our heads against the wall expecting a different results.

But rather to accept that Nature runs it course.

Because there is no reason to rock the boat just because it isn't heading in our planned direction.

We will arrive eventually if we just trust the process.

For those of you unfamiliar with freewriting, the art implies writing non-stop without pausing, just flowing, letting your subconscious parts of yourself to do the task of putting words upon the screen. 100% RAW.

Time spent writing: around 15 minutes.

Now I'm off to play some DOTA2

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At the moment i'm working 7 days a week during the day and about 3 or 4 evenings until about 10-11pm also, i'm totally knackered and not had a day off in ages. You just have to keep going and find the strength to do what you need to do.

Exactly, embrace the suck, as Freud said:

“One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.”

That's always a hard thing to give in to but I think you did the right thing. My first couple of months here I was posting every day or close to it but then life got busy, some days I just don't have anything I think I need or want to share / write about, so I don't.

There are those weeks when I only put up maybe 2-3 posts in a week and then a week later I regret it when I don't get the payouts as often. But I think often times a break is good and it's good to know the signs of needing to recharge mentally because I don't want writing and posting things here to become like a chore / job that I dread doing but feel obligated to do. I already have enough of those things in my life.

I love those days when inspiration just hits me and I immediately realize "I need to go write about this!"...whatever it may be. Those days don't happen every day though. Not for anyone.

Indeed it is a fine balance, but it's all part of the game, just have to embrace it 🙏🏼

Glad to see you around here @cryptokeepr!

Ayeee you’ve been doing a great job on here bro, burn out is to be expected at the pace you were going tho!

Some advice would be try to switch it up! I’ve done everything from streaming video games, drawing, and vlogs which helped keep everything fresh!

🙏🏼

Yeah definitely, variety is something I could use more, especially when both work and studies drain so much time it becomes a lot harder to produce profound self-development content every day ✌🏼

Well I made a decision that might help motivate you a little more. I've noticed your grind and what you have to offer to the community and I think with a little push you can be a big player in the community! So I decided to add you to my voting bot, which should add ~0.80 cent to each of your posts!

I was in a similar situation when I first started where I was going so hard that I burned out and stopped posting for 2 months and somebody reached out to me with a similar comment! Happy I can pay it forward! Looking forward to more fire posts bro!

Brother ❤️

My deepest thanks to say the least, great to see you spreading the value and positive energy here. Living up to your alias the spiderblogger to say the least 😉

And don't worry, you will definitely a lot more content very soon 🙏🏼

That’s what hero’s do haha! 🕸🕷🕸🕷

What @waphillip said. Mixing things up and having a mixture of topics (like this Freewriting post) are key to keeping the momentum going.

Have you considered making Podcasts on dSound? I think your Better You series could translate to that very well.

Keep on trucking mate, hope you can light the fire again soon.

Definitely 🤟🏼

Yes I have, still have yet to decide a final format, but as work & studies settles a bit I will spend more time figuring it out!

Thank you for your words, today is already a lot better so I think it did the trick yesterday 🙌🏼

You said it right at the end there: trust the process. You're a hard working guy and you're showing up. Good things will happen.

Thanks for sharing where you were at with us. All the best, brother.

Oh yes, good things await both of us 🤟🏼

Glad you enjoyed the read @chrismccron!

That's well said I really love this statement "There is a major difference between surrendering and just accepting that today isn't just your day." Sometimes our confidence levels decrease and if we feel ourselves like surrendering we would then surely screw ourselves up, rather we should just take a break and refill our garden(mind) with fresh insights and thoughts. Life is just a sine cycle , there are ups and downs , the way we treat ourselves in the down, would make us to move up. Thanks for sharing your insights :)

Solid comment brother, great to see you around here 🙏🏼

Being an engineer I love your sine analogy, it's inevitable indeed!

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