You might be a Redditor (Original Content)

in #funny8 years ago (edited)

Change is never easy and in your quest for Steem, it can sometimes be difficult to determine if you are on Steemit.com or still posting to Reddit, here are 25 tell-tale signs that you might still be a Redditor.

If you told your kids “we're going camping,” six months ago and still have not returned, you might be a Redditor.

If you spend more time in the McDumpster than you do in McDonald's, you might be a Redditor.

If when your iPhone died you heard Siri yell from her deathbed “You've made some poor life choices,” you might be a Redditor.

If you get stabbed three time a week by an American psycho and you have never even been to America, you might be a Redditor.

If you constantly complain that the news will not report on the Sewer Gator Massacre, which you are the sole survivor, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever gone into a liquor store wearing a Santa Clause outfit, you might be a Redditor.

If your imaginary girlfriend's relationship status says “It's Complicated,” you might be a Redditor.

If the cats in your posts of “Funny Cat Videos” have gotten progressively more dangerous, to the point where it is now just videos of you being chased while yelling “Not Again!,” you might be a Redditor.

If you are still mad at the weather man for preventing you from taking a shower last month, you might be a Redditor.

If you are under constant assault by billionaire elitists that keep trying to switch you with Dan Aykroyd, you might be a Redditor.

If the pay toilet you used last month has now pulled out all of it's savings for counseling, you might be a Redditor.

If the government's plan for taking your children away, was thwarted by some karate chopping mutants that you met in the sewer, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever woken up to find your shadow trying to cut your feet off in a daring escape attempt, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever called the milk company to complain “I'm not lost, I'm right here!” you might be a Redditor.

If you heard the alien scientist complain “You expect me to probe this bum?” during your last abduction, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever argued with the blood bank about which day of the week it is, you might be a Redditor.

If your reflection is obviously doing better than you, but still gets extremely depressed when it looks in the mirror, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever faked symptoms of a serious illness in Dr. Kevorkian's office, you might be a Redditor.

If you randomly get deported away from the country you were born in, you might be a Redditor.

If the Tooth Fairy had to hire additional help to find out where your teeth are fleeing to each night as you sleep, you might be a Redditor.

If you waited two weeks for escrow to finalize on a cardboard box, you might be a Redditor.

If you have ever met your future self only to find out that he took a one way trip to the past just to beat the hell out of you, you might be a Redditor.

If your palm reader acquired PTSD during the initial handshake, you might be a Redditor.

If your guardian angel appears only to show you how much better everyones life would be if you were never born and then jumps off a bridge screaming “It's a horrible life,” you might be a Redditor.

If you looked up during your last stabbing and saw that the American psycho was making it rain Benjamins on some stray hookers as he fled to the limousine, that was me and I post to Steemit.

Let's keep the party going, if you can think of any "You might be a Redditor" jokes post them below.

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If you know Steemit, you might be a redditor :P

LOL I love that $4 Karate Lessons sign!