Not a picture of my actual teen... they look far worse.
I love my kids. Truly. But when it comes to their fashion choices, I sometimes wonder if they are actively trying to test the limits of my patience. I mean, I get that self-expression is important. But at what point does it cross the line from trendy to downright criminal?
Let us start with the ripped jeans. I am not talking about a tasteful little tear at the knee. I am talking full-on shredded denim with more holes than fabric. I offered to buy my daughter a new pair and she looked at me like I had insulted her soul. Apparently, paying money for pants that look like they survived a bear attack is normal now.
Then there are the socks with sandals. My son insists it is ironic. I say it is a tragedy. If I wanted to relive the worst fashion choices of the 90s, I would pull out my old photo albums and cry in private like a normal person.
Do not even get me started on the oversized hoodies that could double as camping tents. Or the tiny sunglasses that serve absolutely no purpose except to make them look like they are starring in a low-budget sci-fi movie.
The other day my daughter wore pajama pants to the grocery store and told me it was a “look.” I wore pajama pants to take out the trash once and they acted like I had committed a federal offense.
Fashion is a mystery and my teens are clearly fluent in a language I do not speak. I have decided to let them wear what they want while I sit in my mom jeans and quietly judge from the sidelines. Because someday they will look back and cringe. And I will be there with photo evidence.