The Coolest Names in World Football of All-Time

Even if you're a rubbish footballer, you can still be a winner with one of the coolest footballer names of all-time.

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14. Harry Daft

Daft means someone that is silly or foolish in English slang which doesn't serve Harry Daft very well. He was far from that as he won the FA Cup in 1894 with Notts County and also played first-class cricket.

13. Creedence Clearwater Couto

The Brazilian journeyman's parents named him after American rock band Creedence Clearwater Revival. Not the smartest idea as it's both difficult to write and pronounce in Portuguese. It's probably easier to just call him his other name Paulista. At least his name has given him some fame as he's only played in the lower Brazilian divisions.

12. Vagner Love

Back in 2012 Vagner Love had an interview with Playboy Brasil and spoke about the orgies he got involved in while playing in Brazil and Russia. His birthname is Vágner Silva de Souza but the interview makes sense now as he was given the surname Love as a result of his playboy lifestyle.

11. Norman Conquest

The Aussie keeper played 11 times for the national team and is inducted into the Football Federation Australia Hall of Fame. He shares the name with the 11th-century invasion of England by an army of thousands of Normans, Bretons, Flemish and other French provinces.

10. Danny Invincible

Australian Danny Invincible reached the heights of English League Two with Swindon Town and scored a goal on the last day which kept them in the Football League. He was very close to being capped at international level but suffered from back and hamstring injuries which he tried to solve by changing the position in his car seat. Not so invincible.

9. Anthony Philip David Terry Frank Donald Stanley Gerry Gordon Stephen James Oatway

Uhh...yes. I wish I was joking. This was the full name of former midfielder Charlie Oatway. His parents were both fans of QPR and when deciding what the name would be of their son, they decided to name him after the entire 1973 QPR first team.

8. Segar Bastard

He played for England way back in 1880 and became one of the most regarded international referees after his playing career. Bastard was also a big gambler and a fan of horse racing.

...I'll be back tomorrow with the final list of the coolest names in world football.


Football Blog FC is a spin-off of Wolfgang Sport, an American and British sports blog I created in 2017. The beautiful game isn't what I remember it to be as a kid and using satire is my way of coping with it. FBFC was created to write about football with a bit of fun reflecting the current state of football.


😂 😂 😂 😂
I can't even imagine anyone answering that no9's name. I mean how do you name one person after 11 people, totally hilarious and weird. But then I remember names like Drinkwater (formerly of Leicester city) and I have to say that English men bear some of the weirdest of names.
I hope this has a part 2 cos I can't wait to see another bastard and Anthony Philip Gordon etc etc....

glad you liked it! part two coming out very shortly

Honestly, some of the names I see some players bear are so hilarious. Many times, I have tried to understand the bases for those weird and funny names but I can't seem to comprehend.

It's crazy! I always try and keep an open mind as there are different languages and cultures involved. I'm sure some English names translate to swear words in other languages

Exactly! Some of them mean unimaginable things in other languages

Vagner Love also played in Türkiye. I also like the names, Woodgate, Drinkwater, Cannavaro, Costacurta, Bridge, Amokachi, Giunti, Veron et cetera...

One of this names appears in the final part ;)

Amazing information on Vagner "Love", I really did'nt know where the surename came from; as for Oatway... his parents must have hated their child to do him such a deed by calling him afet a full squad. I'll be waiting for the second part, my friend.

Part two out soon! Glad you enjoyed the piece

When I saw Harry Daft, for whatever reason, I don't know why the first name that came to my mind was Harry Maguire. 😂

That player who was named after the QPR team, how was his name written on his shirt, was it?

Haha! I'm sure many people are thinking Maguire is a daft.

Oatway was his last name on his shirt, just used his surname

Oh! Couldn't have imagined. Oatway is cool too. 😁

That are some obscure names, can not wait for the Top 3 to be honest :D

Omg this is so funny

Ooww, what are these names? Can names be that much cheap,some of the names even look as abuse! Their parents name selections were very unique, I suppose.

hahaha, 'abuse'! that cracked me up

Great Post!



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My favorite names always be the names of bvb players under Klopp


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