And he broke your heart so many times oh...
You can't forget...
And you gave me a second chance...
But you regret...
I'm just here to let you know that it is time to let it go...
Please forgive...
These lyrics from Forgive by Chike kept repeating in my head as I watch him go on his kneels and plead with me to forgive him again, this is not the first or second time we are going through this same drama. He's fond of doing these things and coming back to ask for forgiveness and here we are again in the same circle of him pleading for forgiveness.
Forgiving him might not seem like a big deal, but definitely, it is not a big deal. The big deal is, why does he keep doing it, why does he always keep doing things that would make him apologize, why does he always have to say sorry, why does he always make me forgive?
Have you ever been in that position where deep down you want to forgive but rather than the forgiveness you are scared and held back by the future? By the fear of the unknown.
Forgiveness? That wouldn't be a problem as I said earlier, I can easily forgive but my question remains. Why does he always ask for forgiveness? Why must he keep doing things that would make him ask for forgiveness?
If it's about forgiveness, I've done that a million times but the question is how long do I have to keep forgiving? How many times do I have to deal with the pain that comes before the forgiveness, how many times more do he need to shatter and make me cry before he stops doing things that would make him ask for forgiveness?
Image by Eric Ward from unsplash
Love they said is supposed to be a beautiful thing, I might not completely oppose to that, but is it still beautiful when you are in love with someone who has to keep hurting and asking for forgiveness?
Wait.. then the love being a beautiful thing came up, the person that came up with it, did the person really deal with the love? I'm not completely saying it's not a beautiful thing, I'm just saying it's a bunch of roller coasters. The happy days are there no doubt, but I think instead of just saying it's a beautiful thing, the hurt that comes from it should also be talked about.
And people that always talk about forgiveness, if you don't mind me asking, Is forgiveness always the best option?
Do you really think it's always best to forgive? I mean, what if it's best to let the person go, what if you are better off without the person? I mean, what if you know the person would still do it again, is forgiveness still an option?
Well, I don't know what your reply may be and everyone is entitled to their own opinion but personally, I feel forgiveness should always be the option because most times it goes beyond the forgiveness, it has a lot to do with personality, future and healing.
When a man keeps on repeating his mistake, it is not love anymore. He doesn't love you anymore if he keeps apologizing to things that was blessed by your forgiveness. A true man becomes better for his woman. And as a woman, you must love yourself first and know your worth because that kind of man ain't worth of your time and love.
Thank you so much for your candid words
People often mistake love with taking an infinite amount of disrespect. Self love is more important, and we need to be true to our hearts
Very true the healthiest kind of love is self love.
Thank you so much for your response ❤️