English
When I was a child, I had many fears, as I was an only child until I was about 11 years old and, besides, I had, I would say, a lot of instability in terms of my caregivers; I was raised by my grandmother until I was 7 and then I went to live with my parents from a small town to the big city...thinking about it, my fears were awakened after I went to live with my parents. Not knowing, arriving in a new environment, where there were new rules for living together, where I was adapting to living with my parents, was a time of discovery and some fears...
Soon, I learned to be afraid of my father, as he was a very strict man of few words. As I grew older, that fear increased, because he was old school, he only said something once and then took action if his instructions were not followed, and even though I was a quiet and even shy girl, I did have my episodes where the belt was my best friend, on few occasions, but that was enough for me to fear my father quite a lot.
Source/ FuenteI held on to this fear for many years, even as an adult. I was always afraid to say something he wouldn't like or that would upset him, because I got used to living with the feeling that I had to please him and not contradict him so he wouldn't get upset. But this led to me feeling frustrated or upset, which filled me with confusion and discomfort. So one day, on my husband's advice, I decided to talk to him and express how I felt, what I had always wanted to say to him since I was little but never did. That day, I expressed it to him in the best way possible.
This happened when he was already ill, and in the midst of his illness, he became quite difficult; he didn't want to follow the doctor's recommendations and instructions, or he was rude to the people who helped me care for him, accustomed to me not saying anything because I was afraid he would get upset and scold me like a child. So that day, after one of his episodes, I simply sat down and told him so many things that freed my soul and that fear; everything flowed, he simply listened to me and in the end he understood.
From that day on, that fear of his reactions and scoldings ceased, but it took a lot of courage for me to sit down and face that fear. After I did it, I felt so good about myself because I felt that I had freed myself from a very heavy burden and understood that there are fears that take almost a lifetime to let go of. Today I remember my father as the great man he was, and I understand his attitudes much better now that I am a mother myself. He simply raised me with the tools that life had given him and that he knew, but above all, he was guided by love until the end of his days.
Source/ FuenteThis is my contribution to The Silverbloggers Chronicles - Prompt #23 - My greatest fear. Best regards, dear friends!
Español
Cuando era niña, yo tenía muchos miedos, pues fui hija única hasta los 11 años aproximadamente y, aparte, tuve, diría yo, como mucha inestabilidad en cuanto a mis figuras de cuidado; me crie con mi abuela hasta los 7 años y luego pasé a vivir con mis padres de un pueblo a la gran ciudad...pensandolo bien, mis miedos se despertaron después de que fui a vivir con mis padres. El no conocer, el llegar a un nuevo ambiente de vida, donde había nuevas reglas de convivencia, donde me estaba adaptando a lo que era convivir con mis padres, fue una etapa de descubrimientos y de algunos miedos...
Pronto, aprendí a tenerle miedo a mi padre, pues era un hombre bastante estricto y de pocas palabras. A medida que fui creciendo, ese miedo se fue incrementando, pues él era de la vieja escuela, solo decía algo una sola vez y luego actuaba si sus instrucciones no eran acatadas y, a pesar de que fui una niña tranquila y hasta tímida, sí tuve mis episodios en que la correa fue mi mejor amiga, pocas ocasiones, pero eso bastó para que le temiera a mi padre y bastante.
Este miedo en especial lo mantuve por muchos años, incluso ya de adulta; siempre temía decirle algo que no le gustara o molestara, porque me acostumbré a vivir con ese sentimiento de que debía complacerlo, a no contradecirlo, para que no se molestara..., pero esto me trajo como consecuencias que me frustrara o me molestara y esto me llenaba de confusión y malestar, así que un día, por consejo de mi esposo, decidí hablar con él y expresarle lo que sentía, eso que desde pequeña siempre quise decirle y que nunca le dije; ese día de la mejor manera posible se lo expresé.
Eso ocurrió cuando él ya estaba enfermo y, en medio de su enfermedad, se ponía bastante difícil; no quería acatar las recomendaciones e indicaciones del médico o se portaba de malas con las personas que me ayudaban a atenderlo, acostumbrado a que no le decía nada porque temía que él se molestara y a esas alturas me regañara como a una cría. Entonces ese día, luego de uno de sus episodios, simplemente me senté y le dije tantas cosas que me liberaron el alma y ese miedo; todo fluyó, él simplemente me oyó y al final comprendio.
Desde ese día, ese miedo a sus reacciones, reprimendas, cesaron; pero me costó mucho tomar el valor de sentarme y enfrentar ese miedo; pero luego de que lo hice, me sentí tan bien conmigo misma, porque sentí que me liberé de una carga muy pesada y entendí que hay miedos que cuestan casi que toda una vida soltar. Hoy recuerdo a mi padre como el gran hombre que fue y entiendo mucho más sus actitudes, después de que fui madre, que simplemente me crio con las herramientas que la vida le había dado y que fue lo que conocía, pero que con todo, lo guio el amor hasta el final de sus días.
Esta es mi participación en The Silverbloggers Chronicles - Prompt #23 - My greatest fear, mis saludos, queridos amigos!
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Our father's words are like a law before that we must obey otherwise we would face the consequences. Glad to know that you have let go of those fears,♥️😁
That's how it was; back then, that was the norm in parenting. Dad's word was law, no questions asked, and well, thanks to that, here we are telling the story. Cheers!
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I understand that growing up in a changing environment can be frightening, especially when moving from the warmth of your grandmother's home to the uncertainty of a new home with your parents. Adapting to new rules and dynamics is a natural process, and it is valuable to recognise how those moments of instability shaped your perspective. Every fear you faced was an opportunity for growth, and what you experienced has made you stronger and more resilient. Cherish those discoveries; they are part of your story.
Just as you say. This is part of my history and part of who I am. Today, I am grateful for everything I have experienced, both good and bad, because it has shaped who I am today, and I am grateful for that. It is part of life.
Thank you for your kind visit and your truly insightful comment. Thank you for reading carefully; it was appreciated. Have a great day!
Parents' words were law, and anyone who dared to disobey had to face the consequences. As you mentioned, parents taught and raised their children according to their own upbringing, always seeking their well-being and preparing them for life. Even as an adult, when I became a mother, I understood my father's principles.
Best regards!
We all understand this with certainty when we become parents and begin to see that it's not as easy as we imagined. Best wishes, my friend!